Why did I fail in life? I did everything that I was supposed to do. I don't understand why I failed?
Every since I started kindergarden I always got high grades. I was always a good student and never got in trouble. When I was in high school I was in the top 5 percent of my graduating class. I was in honors and ap classes. Most of the time I was one of my teacher’s favorite students. When I went to college I continue doing well. I graduated with a 3.8 GPA in my Bachelors of sociology. Now I am working as an assistant manager at dollar tree with more than 80000 in student loans. It is not fair that I am poor with a ton of student debt while Kim Kardashian and these instagram models and rappers have millions of dollars with no debt. They have no education and some of them have criminal records yet they are doing far better than me. Why did I fail?
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17 Answers
You have a degree in an area of study that does not generate anything of value.
You can go back to school and learn something of value, or go learn a trade to earn a good living. Or get a Masters and then a doctorate in Sociology and teach.
You can also take civil service exams and get a job working for the government – either local government, County government, state or federal government. You should look at websites for civil service exams in your area, see what tests are coming up that you qualify for, apply for all tests that you qualify for, and you will get hired from a canvas list. I just retired at age 55 with a pension, after working for the government, having a BA in History (and what do you do with a BA in History?).
You won’t like this, but it’s basically down to pure dumb luck.
There are certain traits that are more conducive to “success”, primarily extroversion and conscientiousness, but then it’s down to pure dumb luck whether you have those (and others) in the first place. Given your studious nature, you’re probably good for conscientiousness.
Extroversion is really useful these days, particularly with “influencers” and similar lucrative pseudo-jobs that basically entail having your own online personality cult.
Really—don’t beat yourself up about it. It’s not your fault. It’s just the way reality is for us humans. The stupid and inept can become popular and wealthy with enough luck.
I think it’s society that’s failed you. You studied hard and did your best. You should have been able to get a better job. Maybe your country doesn’t value the (social) sciences enough? A relative of mine studied what you did, and he lived very comfortably, writing books and advising schools. He did, though, get a higher degree than “just” a B.A. If you’re free to move, you could think about going back to school elsewhere, for less money.
It’s definitely completely wrong that you got a degree, thinking the money and time would be worth it because you’d get a good job, and then it turned out not to help you much. From a European perspective, that amount of student loans is absolutely inconceivable. I don’t know why your country is making life so hard for young people, but it’s certainly unfair (and unwise).
I do think you can probably get a better job, though. Have you tried asking people in your field for advice? Or looking for jobs that call for a college degree, but not a specific one?
You are not a failure. One is only a failure when one blames others for the mistakes one makes. Best to learn from your mistakes, and move on. Life happens to us all.
I know a mature student who took 40 years to finish his accounting degree. He started his own company and just retired.
I think society has failed you more than anything.
Entertainment industry is flourishing because of us, believe it or not. We made them who they’re now. 1 episode of tv series gives them ( for a 5 min scene) more than the salary of software engineer’s monthly hard work (depending on their popularity). There are many places where the society has failed us, but this one is at it’s worst.
Aside from that, things mostly comes down to one’s own luck also, many believe luck has nothing to do with it… it’s hard work that pays but this only applies when everyone plays fair, I know the world doesn’t.
Anyway, for your question, you can try to learn new courses, get as many degrees as possible, also gain working experience… It matters a lot when applying for a high post jobs..
Don’t be discouraged by how society treats you.. and keep trying..
Good Luck
Call me cynical, but we live in a world where aggressive psychopathic behaviour is what succeeds in life, whether it be in business or politics or almost anything else. Look at Elizabeth Holmes for example. She failed to complete her university course but went on to create a $9 billion company based on nothing but a forceful personality and an unwavering self-belief. There are endless other examples many of them genuine successes as well as many who have ended up in jail.
@michaelglee You are doing fine. We are competing against 7 billion other humans. Don’t give up. You could start your own YouTube video and help others in your field for free, (to start). Or do something creative. Assistant manager at Dollar Tree is a great accomplishment for a 20/30 year old.
If you watch the show Teen Mom, you would see how well off you are when compared to the possibility that you dodged. Having a pregnant wife while, you playing video games instead of looking for work, to look after the baby.
You are doing well, compared to the average. Congratulations @michaelglee, and keep up the good work.
I would suggest you go for some career counseling and see if you can get extra training or be directed to a field where your degree would be an asset. Many community colleges have free career counseling services. Don’t label yourself a failure, but don’t think you are a victim or entitled to a good life. You may have to work to figure this out.
Your expectations were set to high, either by you or your parents. Fate is fate. There is no reason behind it.
School lied to you about the real world. The smartest person I know makes sandwiches in a deli. He picked a degree in some social science. In the end he could not fully understand that success is not automatic, that you won’t be paid just to be smart and have good grades or a good demeanor. Society will not pick you to be useful somewhere. You have to figure out a balance between what your talents are, what you like to do and what society values and rewards. There is not a lot of need for sociologists. It’s probably not a career option. But, it’s value is in adjacency. If you supplement it with some other trade you can find that success. I know another very smart person with a degree in philosophy. He is an electrician making six figures. The soft skills he learned and the rigor of his education is easy to spot and has served him well in a trade. Most important is just don’t just give up and settle for Dollar Tree. You’re no failure, you’re just not successfull in your mind yet.
A lot of high achievers think of life after school is the treat they get for doing good as a child.
I dropped out of college, and joined the military. There I learned a few important things about life. One is, each school, training course, hobby adds something to your value, but not one is a final step. No matter how much you prove yourself in one arena, you have to bring it full force to each stage of life, or employment.
Getting frustrated, and losing momentum is a future killer.
About 30 years ago, a friend got a Bachelors in Sociology and he ended up working full time (although seasonal) at the County golf course. I’m not sure what he did there, groundskeeping maybe? Again, that’s a civil service job (which I discussed above) but a totally different job than the degree was for.
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