General Question

Jeruba's avatar

How can I best make use of help in doing cleanup?

Asked by Jeruba (56106points) March 31st, 2022

I have some serious decluttering to do. I’m having to face the fact that I am not physically up to the task; my chronic back pain flares up quickly and goes into debilitating spasms.

So if I use help, as I realize I must, how do I do it? I don’t even know the answer to the basic question: should I give direction—or take direction? or both, or neither? I don’t even know what direction I would give.

So much of what’s here I have to review myself because real stuff is thoroughly mixed with disposables. I can’t just say “Take everything.” Nor can I succumb to the urge to save everything, which is how I got here—that plus a lot of procrastination and distraction.

So should I—

•   Hire a decluttering expert for ~$90/hour to manage the process (so, necessarily, it would have to be brief)
•   Hire a document-sifting expert to identify what’s important among all the papers
•   Bring a sympathetic relative to town (from far away) and avert my eyes while she uses her best judgment
•   Pull out a few treasures and some basics, plus important papers, and let a salvage outfit just haul the rest away
•   Hire a crew from a local nonprofit for the developmentally disabled, who will supply the physical power but need close supervision and direction
•   Allow a friend or two to come in and work under my direction
•   Other?

Whether I move back east or not, I have to do this part.

If you’ve been here and dealt with it, what worked?

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9 Answers

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I am sorry to know about your back pain. That’s not something I would wish on an enemy.

This is a quandary and requires some thought. I sincerely hope someone who has experienced this first hand will answer.

I like the idea of hiring a professional best. They are accustomed to sifting through many piles and culling what is truly unnecessary. In the way of therapy, they are an emotionally unattached, disinterested third party who can objectively state whether something is of real value. It is expensive, so I suggest setting a time limit that you’re comfortable with. Once the time limit is reached, even if they haven’t concluded, you can make one pass through the remnants to assess what is there and then pay a salvage company to haul away the remainder.

I like that idea best, because it involves the least amount of emotions. A sympathetic relative is going to trigger emotions – rightly or wrongly. The point is that the emotions (possibly problematic ones) will be triggered. Friends will cause similar problems.

If you hire a crew from the nonprofit employing the developmentally disabled, you are going to have to supervise, and that will trigger emotions. You would be bombarded during the process with question after question about the worth of items. You would have to make judgements over and over again as long as the process lasted.

There’s the idea of you pulling out a few treasures and having everything hauled away. My hesitation with that option is that you might be tempted to keep more than is necessary. There is also a possibility of regret after the fact. You could decide to get rid of an item and then regret it later.

All of this is sad. I am sorry you are faced with such a difficult task and hope you will find a solution you are happy with.

canidmajor's avatar

When my friend did this, she went to her senior center to get recommendations for organizers, estate sale people, etc. she sorted through the paperwork herself, but hired a kid to keep feeding the shredder.
Good luck with this!

kritiper's avatar

Deal with the big stuff first. You’ll be amazed at how fast the mess seems to get cleaned up!

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Get two or three people that buy estates to give you written offers, get a pro for processing documents. Cash from sale of furniture, rugs and artwork.

raum's avatar

Oh man. I can sympathize with this daunting task. But not sure if I’m in much of a position to offer any advice. Kind of in a similar boat. Trying to tame our own beast over here.

I’d be more keen to recommend a technique if we were done. But we’re still in the thick of it.

LadyMarissa's avatar

There are companies that were specifically set up to assist hoarders. They are very adept at sorting the keep, the emotional, & the trash. When in doubt, they will ask you IF you want to keep. IF you really want to get rid of the clutter, leave & allow them to go at it. Yes, you will lose a few things that you would prefer to keep. Still, I think you will find it easier to deal with the loss of that item than dealing with the emotional side of being sure to keep it!!! They don’t come cheap, but they are very efficient. During the sorting, they also deep clean your home. And I do mean DEEP clean!!! They are pro’s at recognizing clutter & fixing that problem for you.

JLeslie's avatar

Based on other Q’s, I think you need to do some sorting, so I think having someone with you to help do the sorting might be productive. Maybe 4–8 hours (1–2 days). They can help you with the thought process and get the momentum going. One session, and then you do it on your own for a while, and then another session when you get stuck.

Once you have sorted then you can donate, throw away, or sell. Although, I think your main goal in sorting should be what do you want to keep.

A senior center near you might have recommendations of people or companies that take care of all parts of it. I would call references if they have names and numbers, and they can tell you what it was like. I think previously I linked the organizers association https://www.napo.net/. It sounds like you’ve already contacted organizers if you know the hourly fee.

If you have things worth some money, there are usually people who will clear out a house and pay you. These estate companies give you very little money for your items, but sometimes the alternative is you paying someone to haul away everything, especially if it’s heavy or large items. Little things you can just add to your trash pick-up.

Used book stores and libraries will take books. My dad just got rid of 14 boxes of books a few days ago, he made a couple hundred bucks. He said he has 110 more boxes to do over the next several weeks.

Note: when a company comes to haul your items away, expect they will work very fast. You have to be really ready and make sure you have the items you’re keeping separated or out of the house altogether.

jca2's avatar

I haven’t read the previous comments so I’m not sure if my idea has been mentioned yet, but I would start going through things (papers, knick knacks, memorabilia, clothes) and then hire a kid (teenager or young adult) for 15 or 20 cash per hour to help with lifting, bagging, sorting, and putting stuff in your car or somewhere where it can be picked up. Vietnam Vets will pick up at your house for free. I used to think they took only clothes but they also take “stuff” stuff, like baby cribs, books, appliances, and “stuff.”

LadyMarissa's avatar

Here, Goodwill is an excellent source after you have it sorted, bagged, & ready to go. They will take pretty much anything including the kitchen sink!!! PLUS…they will let YOU determine what your donation is worth & they will sign it so it can become a tax write-off as a donation to a charity.

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