(NSFW) what is sex like for virgins?

It totally depends on the skill and consideration of your lover. There is no “one size fits all” answer.

Don’t have sex just because you are going to be 16. There are all sorts of risks with having sex and of course use a condom if you do choose to have sex. It is usually best if you are with someone you care about and they care about you and you both trust each other.

I think for most people the first time isn’t much of anything and you are so caught up in what it is going to be like and a little nervous that you don’t even experience it fully. If you are a female it is nice if your hymen is already broken so there is no pain involved. You might have already broken it if you masturbate or use tampons.

Often awkward. It will get better with practice.

Whatever you think it will be like, the first time will be different and likely a disappointment. Fantasy is way better than reality.

First of all, DON’T have sex just because it is legal! That is one of the worst reasons there is. Only if you are ready AND only if you want to AND only if you are being safe. I am a 17-year-old girl and I have not had sex yet and I’m still okay with that. I realize everyone is different so I’m not here trying to tell you what to do, but just be smart about it. Sure I wonder about what it is like and I’d be lying if I said I never fantasized about it but I know there are many ramifications that stem from it also. Please think very hard about this.

Awkward, sticky, disappointing. Wait awhile, you’ll thank me later.

@KIA: GA.

Wasn’t going to dive in here, but I want to push the opposite direction as one or two other people here. Obviously, don’t have sex if you’re not ready, and only you can decide if you’re ready. Definitely DON’T have sex because of peer pressure.

However, also don’t wait just to wait. Don’t wait because you want it to be ‘perfect’, or any romantic nonsense like that. Do it. Be safe. Wrap that dick up. Use alot of lube. But get past it. Because once the pressure’s off, then you can enjoy it. And it’s just easier to do that when you’re relatively young and your partner is in the same boat as you.

You’re only a virgin once, so try and make it special.

Try not to make it end too quickly.

Just want to say that there’s a lot of “sex” that can be experienced besides penetration and most of it is a lot more satisfying. It makes sense to do a lot of physical exploring, especially with someone you care about, before deciding to “go all the way” as we used to say.

Turning sixteen doesn’t mean it’s time for you to go out looking for sex. That is a decision to make based on the relationship between you and your probable lover. And keep in mind that even though you may think you are ready and desire this person, you may change your mind right up to the last minute. Be sure or say no. Trust that voice inside you.

It isn’t all anyone thinks or says it will be. Best to go in really liking the person you’re with.

Depends on if you’re a boy or a girl.

The sex I had as a teenager was not half as good as the sex I had as an adult. When a teenager, we were learning, inexperienced, I was not advocating for what I wanted or needed, and the end result was not too thrilling. Of course, that was not everyone’s experience but I think it happens more often than not.

That was my experience too @jca2. I think that’s the experience for most girls their first time….and beyond. It’s like “What’s the big deal all about?”

^^ Or, “That’s it? You mean we’re done?” Jeez, I didn’t even know there was something to look forward to.

@elbanditoroso I’m pretty sure that if you go without having sex for more than 3 months that you revert back to being a virgin. HA!

^^ WRONG. You become someone who used to have sex…you CANNOT get your virginity back no matter how long you wait!!! After 3 months, you no longer care IF you ever have sex again!!!

I was a guy who got convinced to wait for “true love” or some crap like that. I regret waiting as long as I did and all of the times I declined the invitation. I thought somehow women would respect me more or something, but it really just made me look like a werido.

I’m not saying you should ever agree to do something you’re uncomfortable with or do anything unsafe, but I waited longer than I could have and realized later that it was a dumb choice (for me at least).

@LadyMarissa Wow. Lighten up. It was a joke.

Losing one’s virginity is a lot like the first time you cook a big holiday dinner. Way too much planning, overthinking, and anticipation for what will likely be a mediocre outcome.

Virginity, in and of itself, really is not something that should be celebrated or mocked, it is not that big of a deal. Being intimate for the first time should be with someone you trust, but don’t set too much store by it.

The guy I lost my virginity to was much more enamored with the idea than I was. To echo @canidmajor, it’s not that big of a deal. Down right boring and disappointing, actually.

@Dutchess_III I’m sorry that you seem so negative on sex. It can be quite pleasant.

Reading these responses… gosh, I don’t know what to think…?

I’ve had a handful of positive experiences @janbb. And they were earth shattering.
Other than that I just went with the guy’s flow. And it was pleasant.

@RayaHope “I don’t know what to think…?”

Trust your own judgement. Don’t let others pressure you (into sex or celibacy). It’s your body and you’ll know what’s right for you.

Jeezus.

I see 31 answers but only one honest virgin with anything to say.

Looks like this is another question where the “losers” are the winners ;p

^^ Well, why don’t you contribute some of your wisdom to the discussion then?

@JLoon I don’t understand your objection to 30 of 31 posts here. The question is, and I quote, “What is sex like for virgins?“
One can pretty well assume that all of us who have had sex were once virgins and can therefore speak from experience.
Did you misunderstand the Q?

@canidmajor – Yes I do crabbypants, evidently better than you know how to take a joke o_0

@janbb – I think some of us knew more about sex before we were virgins.

But that’s not wisdom, just a thought.

Got the joke, didn’t find it funny. It was couched in too much gobbledegook.

@canidmajor – I’ll bet that’s what she said.

I’m well and truly lost now. Luckily, a turkey dinner is on the horizon.

@Arcus – It’s not a job, or a hobby, or an accident, or a plan, or a problem, or the answer to everything.

It ends up being like most of the rest of life. So make it fun, with someone else who wants to have fun with you.

And remember that half the people who tell you what sex is secretly wish they could go back and make it better. But the good news is, everyone can do that.

So start whenever you feel ready. I’m on your side.

You’ll be fine.

How can we go back and make it better?

@Dutchess_III – Every next time is another chance ; )

I didn’t have a clue until. I met my first husband when I was 22.

@JLoon I think some of us knew more about sex before we were virgins.

Is this what you intended to type? Because what comes before virginity??

Experimenting comes before losing your virginity @smudges.

@smudges – Yes.
@Dutchess_III – Yes.
@Everyone else – Yes, yes, YES!!!

And I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.

@Dutchess_III @JLoon wrote ”before we were virgins”. We were born virgins, so there’s nothing that came “before we were virgins”.

^^ This ^^ is becoming emabarassing, and the OP is probably wondering what the hell they started.

No, it’s not a misstatement or a misunderstanding (on my part) – it’s a joke.

I don’t usually explain jokes, or diagram sentences. But I will this time just to keep anyone else from tripping over this thing and hurting themselves -

It’s actually based partly on a quote from Groucho Marx :
“I’ve been around so long I knew Doris Day before she was a virgin.” But also, from something I heard on some rerun of Roseanne :
“I was a virgin until I was 20, and then again until I was 23.”

Still wondering? I said it because frankly I think it makes as much sense as some of the disappointments other people were sharing.

Sex is supposed to be fun. And if you believe that, sooner or later it will be.

Now move along. Nothing more to see here.

Ok, now I understand…sort of. But jokes aren’t really funny if you’re the only one who gets them or you have to explain them. So to get your joke, someone would have to have seen or heard the quote from Groucho Marx or seen that particular episode of Roseanne. Otherwise it was simply easily misunderstood. Since what you wrote made no sense, I figured it was a mis-type. smh

@smudges – You can stop now 0_o

Offense is taken…never given.

@LadyMarissa – Right.

This reminds reminds me that around here, telling a joke is like having sex in public.

Some people will be disgusted and go away.

Some people will be interested and cheer you on.

And some will tell you you’re doing it wrong because they don’t feel anything.

(And in case any fluther “experts” are wondering, I’m not joking)

For me, it was exellent! Just about as good as a girl’s first time could be.

For me(female) it left me wondering what all the fuss was about. A bit confusing. I was 15.
The “age of consent” only really comes into play when it involves an “adult” having sex with a legal minor. Statutory rape and all.