Should I reach out to my neighbor?

You could say something like you’ve missed seeing her on her walks. Then ask if everything is ok, but she may volunteer it when you mention it. I’d bet whe would be so pleased to know she was missed, if she’s ‘with-it’ enough. I’d guess she is since she’s taking walks again.

You could either go over or wait for another walk; either one I would think would be appropriate.

Kindness and concern is never a bad idea.

I think it would be kind, she may have a need you can assist with, as a neighbor.

Yes.

Speaking from the other side, I have a neighbor who sends me a text or a “Thinking of You” card with a note about once every 6 months saying Haven’t seen you lately. You OK??? Just want to remind you that I’m here if you need me. I’m very independent minded, but it’s still good to be reminded that somebody out there pays attention & cares. I don’t contact her for every little thing…choosing to save her for the really needed stuff like when my car was in the shop & I desperately needed a few groceries, She took me to the store & waited for me to grab a few things to hold me over until I could get my car back. Then she told me to call her once the car was ready & she’d take me to pick it up. She says it with such concern, it makes me feel more comfortable to call her when really needed. I’d find it annoying if she showed up at my door, but the gentle reminder is most welcomed!!!

I wouldn’t go to her door; however, if you have her number, give her a call & at a minimum offer. If you don’t have her number, wave at her next time she’s walking by & step out to privately offer to be there for her. Then ask for her number so you can contact her when you don’t see her for a while. Bet nobody in her family thinks to check on her.

Yes. It’s the neighborly thing to do. You saw her first hand so it isn’t like you are going over to see if gossip was true (we all do it). Unless you absolutely don’t know this woman and she doesn’t know you, checking on her would be a kindness.

The friendly neighborly thing to do is to connect with your neighbors. It would be best to connect in this situation. Knowing you care is very important.

@seawulf575

> going over to see if gossip was true (we all do it).

Hmm? I’ve never done it, never even thought of it; and none of my neighbors has ever come to my door to check on gossip. Must be different where you live.

Call her and ask if she needs help. She’ll ask why you are asking and tell her that seeing her made you a little concerned about her. Be honest….why not? That tells her she can trust you.

@Jeruba I guess. You’ve never looked out your windows when you see something odd at a neighbor’s house? Do you know your neighbors? Do you talk with your neighbors?

My little neighborhood is pretty friendly. I know many of the people in it, I talk with them on a regular basis, and we watch out for one another. But with that comes the inevitable gossip. There is the guy up the street that is just plain weird. Mental, really. Was stalking a girl around the corner until the girl’s husband confronted him. There is the gentleman up the street who just had a stroke. The guy across the street that is getting dementia. The woman next door and her mom who moved in about a year ago that aren’t used to living in suburbia. They invite us to their parties, we invite them over if there is a bad storm coming, etc. But many people are there for you if you need them. I always viewed it as being a community.

Sure I have, and sure I do, @seawulf575, but it has nothing to do with gossip. To me it seems like a normal level of interaction for a city neighborhood of the sort that has trees and sidewalks and yards separated by shrubbery.

@Jeruba Maybe it is the definition of “gossip” that is sticking. My view of gossip is sharing information about others. The things I mentioned are all things that came up in conversation in my neighborhood. Most of it was not said to spread dirt, just to keep others informed. Yes, the more odious forms of gossip also occur but that is just foolishness and I tend to ignore it. Speculation at best. And to be honest, I don’t hear a lot of it going on.