What is the best way to entertain an alzheimers patient?.

Listening to music is good, but the best thing for most- if they are in the “walking” stage, is to walk, walk, walk. Give them a sandwich or finger foods to eat while you are walking. Offer liquids in a sippy cup or glass with straw if they are shaky- carry it along and offer it often. If you let us know which stage of Alzheimers he is in, it would be more helpful for letting you know about activities. (Because of the poor memory, reading is usually not too helpful- they are too restless for that, and can’t remember what the last few sentences were.)

That is tough. My very old mother, (almost) 94 has senile dementia, which is a complete loss of short term memory. The staff where she is living recommended that my sis and I read “Learning to Speak Alzheimer’s” by Joanne Koenig Coste. (Amazon. It is a short, clear and sensible book and helped us separate our needs from mother’s. We would be behaving much differently and in a counter-productive manner had we not read it.

Good luck. You are a good nephew or niece. Remember to keep breathing.

A lot of energy will be spent on chores and activities of daily life. Follow your uncle’s lead and not your own guilt and need to “do something.” Often simply sitting in the sun or going for a drive (with very little conversation) is the best. Don’t be afraid of the silence.

My mother still reads but can’t remember. Her hearing makes listening to music at volumes that I can stand difficult.

With our mother, I (being the oldest and having the earliest memories) I can talk about the days when I was very young. Or the times before my birth. She has some memories and likes to talk about them, but they are spotty. If she gets stuck, I drop the subject.

Make sure you stick to the established routine and offer help where he needs it; dressing, shower, shave, meals?

It is not going to be fun. Your internal attitude will help you both a lot. It will be frustrating, if you let it.

You are a sweet and brave soul.It is so good to do this for your uncle and aunt

greylady’s suggestion seems best shot. Walking outside is best, or an indoor mall (lots of color, people,) and trying to converse while walking is good. Most brain dependant activities are tough on both parties.

My mother would find lots of color, people, noise and conversation distracting and difficult and would want to head for the silent hills as soon as possible. Generalities about Alzheimer or Dementia are not valid. We would both loathe indoor malls.

Last week we drove her to a look-out over the Stockbridge (Tanglewood) Bowl; we set her up in a deck chair and just sat and looked at the leaves and the lake and birds for 30 minutes. Very little talk. Then we took her out to lunch. She ate but said nothing. My sis and I chit-chatted.

I would like to suggest some interesting board games or mild physical games that would provide entertainment and also require moderate thinking.

@Boxing: often with Alzheimer’s patients, if they can’t remember or catch on, their anxiety levels go way up. You can’‘t generate entertainment or moderate thinking if their brain simply cannot do it.

My mother used to love jigsaw puzzles; now she is overwhelmed. Just one example. She also chooses to eat alone in a community dining room because 1) she can no longer hear too well and 2) she can’‘t remember enough to follow or contribute to a conversation. We are doing her a favor by letting her eat by herself. Trained nurses on staff concur.

Alzheimer’s is similar and yet totally different with each patient just as each patient is different. Some enjoy the indoor mall, some like outside in peace.

Ask your aunt some of what she and he do everyday

My deepest gratitude to
everyone for sharing.
My uncle is in the worst stage where he can barely walk so walking is not an option. I think that driving him around may be a good idea however since he has a very hard time walking I believe he cannot leave the the house as they prefer to say close to the bathroom and such. I think the worst part for my aunt is not so much the hard work but when he calls her name repeatedly even though she is right there and in fact never left the room. Sometimes he will repeat her name all day. He doesn’t seem to want anything exept to the need to say her name 200+ times. This seems to be what wears her down the most. It’s easy to dismiss until you see it for yourself as I did. She is so strong otherwise except when he is going through this which apparently happens two,three times a week. It drains her of the energy she needs to care for him. They live in another state. I am flying there to assist her hoping that she feels less overwhelmed.
Do Alzheimers patients regress back to their childhood?

@Jay: My mother does not officially have Alzheimer’s but Senile Dementia, which has a much later onset. She asks us the same questions over and over and carries around scraps of paper with notes written on them. When my sis or I take her to the doctor, she asks us, again, over and over the name of the Doctor and why we are going? She has picked up some sly tricks to help her (i.e., the notes to herself), but they are just tricks.

Can your family get some caregiver service so that your aunt can have a nap, a few hours off, some help with housekeeping? How old is your uncle? How much time does he have between trips to toilet? Is he sweet or bad-tempered? Does he still dress himself? Does he remember to eat?

Jaybee please give your aunt a hug…she is a hero to be able to do this so lovingly and you are good to be giving the care giver time to take care of herself

As you can see, all the comments above clearly show that Alzheimer’s changes over time and affects people differently.
Up until her death, my mother, who was totally unintelligble but physically able, did enjoy walking anywhere.
But when it got dark, she freaked out, unless she was at home.
I think, overall, the stages are similar for most:
My mother started writing notes to herself like: We moved here in 1955; got out her nursing degree and underscored the date of graduation, our pictures, as children, were all over the house…
Short term memory totally gone.
Disconnect between her actions and her mind (ie after a holiday dinner, she took some butter with her fingers and began rubbing her hands together, then grabbbed some bread slices to wipe it off; when asked what she was doing “washing my hands”
Then her ability to speak words stopped.
But as a person who always liked be outside and active, walks were a constant pleasure, but even then she would say, when able, should we go back now?.

Good of you to relieve your aunt, but get a good assessment of your uncle’s capabilities from her.

My grandpa has alzheimers. We go for rides in the country or to the park to feed the ducks in his old pickup he had to give up driving a little over a year ago.

Alheimers progresses differently than senile dementia in most patients. They tend to regress both in physical ability and in short term memory until you can tell they are in the stage to ask for Mama, or a familiar name, over and over. Later, he will stop talking all together.

It sounds like your Uncle is past the wandering, walking stage, but he may still be able to go on car rides and have an ice cream cone, etc. with your help if he is still able to partly feed himself. If he is not continent (has to wear an adult diaper), be sure to have one on him when you leave the house. If he hasn’t needed them yet, it may be a good time to put one on him for a trip away from home (bathroom)- you could get a package of the kind that are very padded, but have elastic waists so they can be pulled up and down, like underpants.

He may like soft music, or music of the era when he was young. You can try it, and see if he smiles, or acts relaxed. If you go somewhere to eat, take a wet washcloth in a plastic bag for (probable) spills. It will be a lot of trial and error on your part, to see what works on which days.
Jaybee, it is a wonderful thing you are doing for them- that is about the hardest thing in the world- to be a care giver round the clock, over many months or years.

Thank you once again to everyone. This has been truely helpful.