Trying to be maintain a friendship with an ex boyfriend's friend/ best friend's roommate?

ok. maybe it’s because of the time right now, but i am confused. this person is….your Ex’s Friend? Orrrr your best friend’s roommate? Or both? Or is your ex your best friend?

He is both. He lives with my best friend AND is also my recent ex’s good friend. Sorry for the confusion.

Ok so he’s not much of anything to you? You basically say that you have known him for a while but not really well. So more like you probably hung out a couple of times while you were still w/ your ex? So why do you need/want a friendship with him? Though it is strange for him to invite you over for beer and not talk. Strange and rude.

Since this individual is a good friend of your recent Ex, maybe he is unsure on how to approach you or communicate with you due to your previous relationship with HIS good friend and he doesn’t want to create any friction anywhere.

Or it could be just as PnL stated above and he is just a strange and rude individual.

I agree with Blue about the fact that he probably thinks it’s awkward and doesn’t want to seem like he’s betraying his good friend by talking to you (i don’t know how amicably you two broke up), but him inviting you over implies a) he wants to talk to you about something or b) he likes you and now that you are single, he wants to make a move but is unsure how to approach the situation.

I agree. I think he could be interested in you, and is uncomfortable talking to you because he would be inclined to spill it without knowing how it would be received, if you’re putting out “just friends” vibes. That would explain the avoidance of conversation with you by talking to others instead; he was distracting himself. Guys do that when they have something to say, but are not sure how it will be received.

If you’re interested in him, ask him to help you do something, and see what type of conversation transpires in a less public place. If you’re not interested, then keep the relationship to multi-friend settings.

Since he lives with your best friend, can you ask him/her about this and see what he/she thinks? I agree with the others. He was either being really rude, or is interested in you and doesn’t know how to act. Either way, he needs to learn some manners.

I agree with PnL all the way.

As a guy, I know that there have been a couple of women that I would want to spend time with but also felt the need to act distant because it didn’t seem right to be attracted to someone that my buddy liked.

Most likely, if there isn’t strong enough connection to get over that awkwardness, then you shouldn’t try to go hang out with him as friends unless your best friend is also around. Maybe something will happen, but most likely things will fade and you guys will go back to being casual friends again.

@chica—I’m assuming that his asking you to meet him for a beer was a one-to-one invitation and not let’s have a big group of people meet for a beer. The people he talked to at the bar were either people who were there by accident, or strangers, right?

Yes, they were there by accident. He may or may not have known them because we were at a place where he works. I thought it was clear to him we were friends and only friends. THANK YOU FOR YOUR INPUT!