What should you NEVER do in raising teenagers?

Do not be condescending.

Do not consider yourself the only person with power in the relationship.

Do ease up on rules and restrictions gradually.

Do seek professional help if you see storm signs.

Do keep your mouth shut when you are carpooling (you will learn some fascinating info if you drive like the invisible mom).

Don’t snoop or pry.

Do remember how you felt at times when you were a teenager.

Go far away and scream from time to time.

Adopt a friend’s teen and lend her yours’.

This too shall pass.

Never want to be their friend more than you want to be their Parent!

Never show fear!

Never tell them any bad things you did when you were a teenager and don’t let them get into too serious of relationships when they are young.

@jessturtle23: Most of the teens with the “loosest” parents I know in terms of alcohol and drugs and telling their kids about their experiences with them are the most straightedge well put together kids I know. (Not that you can’t be well put together if you drink and do drugs.) Just for a different perspective on that not telling them about your own teenage years.

Don’t look it in the eyes, they take that as a threat!

I don’t agree with the friend post; my daughter and I have always been best friends. We both respect eachother and as she’s grow older has come to understand some of the things she didn’t when she was younger. We’ve had many arguments, but always end up talking thru them and laughing.
My best advice would be to talk to them openly ABOUT EVERYTHING (nothing should be taboo). You can recommend the correct way to do things; but at times they have to learn by doing. As hard as that is to watch; it’s important for them.
I told my daughter about my experiences as a teen, when she was old enough to understand. Best of all, try to remember how it was when you were their age; I remember my teenage years vividly. I was far from an angel, but not that bad.
Keep an open mind: esp regarding fashion trends. Make sure they know what’s expected of them re: grades and school.
And lastly, don’t sweat the small stuff.
Good luck!

Set boundaries, but be flexible. Set-up agreed upon consequences, and stick to them. Never say one thing and do another.

I’m a teenager for one more year, and my parents always logically explained to me why something was bad to do. They taught me that you shouldn’t do drugs, because even though you get a great feeling, it will eventually ruin your life because you’ll overdose or waste all your money on the addiction. They never just told me I couldn’t do something, they told me why I shouldn’t do something. So when situations came up, common sense told me I shouldn’t do this. I guess the main point would be to get them to understand consequences of their actions, then you won’t have to force anything.

Don’t forget to breathe!

Be honest about your values, expectations, and boundaries. Make sure you keep your word in every situation. Remember that you are the parent and that kids need structure. All actions are not intended to bother you, but normally come from an inability to regulate frustration tolerance. You are a parent to provide roots and wings.

Never lie or break a promise with them.

Never give them alcohol.

Never assume you know everything about them.

dont campare them to each other, my parents compare me to my older brother (we are 13 months apart) and i cant stand it, and neither can my brother.

Well I would recommended a couple of great books to check out or buy to gain some insight from experts in this area of parenting. Between Parent and Child by Dr. Haim G Ginott is a fascinating book about strengthening your relationship with your children and how to be a model in your child’s life. Also Meg Meeker has written two books that will be helpful for both parents, one is called Strong Fathers Strong Daughters and the other is called Boys Should Be Boys. Here is a link to an article about some of the myths of parenting teens as well. Hope this information is helpful.