What is the point of Wax Lip Candy?

We used to get those when I was a kid. You just kind of…wore them. After that got boring, we’d chew on them, like gum. Gum with no flavor. So, uh, hmmm…it beats the shit out of me!

Because it’d be difficult to explain why you’d
given your child a chew toy meant for dogs?

‘Tis funny looking.

I have one of those flexible rulers, the ones that bend (kinda defeats the purpose of having a straight edge) and I chew on that all the time, maybe it’s a bit like that?

Not to mention you get to look like a gimp with no reward.

I agree with everyone. I think they are also a subtle way of the “man” trying to eliminate dumb kids like I was. I ate them for years till someone told me they were wax. I just thought it was really, really, bad candy, but I was one of those boys who believe, “Candy is Candy and should always be eaten no matter how bad it is or what it is.”
In my later years I enjoyed attaching them to pumpkins and blowing them right-the-F-up!

I don’t know, but they used to crack me up…they were incredibly gross, though! The humor was short-lived, but for a quick laugh – they were fun.

They were like the poor man’s Nik-L-Nip. A big, gross chunk of vaguely bubble-gum tasting red wax. At least Nik-L-Nips were filled with that incredible nectar. How I long for that nectar. And then you got to chew the bottle, too!

Both of these candies are exquisite examples of American wastefulness.

My grandfather would buy my cousins and I one every time he would see us when we were young. We got a kick out of seeing each other with them on, and our parents and family got a kick out of all the photo opportunities that come along with it. So, although there was no taste to this so called “candy”, we all enjoyed them, and maybe that’s all they are meant for.

I remember them having a subtle sweet taste and just chewing them like gum.

Great herpe hiders.

It was just like a mask, like fake ears or Groucho Marx glasses. They just looked funny. You put them on and mugged and acted silly with them and then chewed on them. They were slightly sweet and tasted weird. Don’t know why anyone ever made them in the first place, but once they did, I guess they kept making them because kids bought them.

@bluemukaki, I have that kind too. Love ‘em! But eventually I chew off the markings.

I used to just go to the stationery store and look in the engineering supplies section. But they became hard to find around the time people stopped doing their own drawings. I went from store to store asking for a certain kind of ruler, explaining that the primary requirement was chewiness. For some reason clerks were not eager to help me. Finally I found them online and bought six. I’m only on number 2 now and hope the supply will last me the rest of my life.

They were invented by a candy company, and originally contained sugar and a sort of juice flavoring. They were fun for pretending like we were grown-up ladies, wearing lip-stick. What I want to know is why on earth grown up women actually want their lips to look like that today, with injected butt fat. ewwwwwww

@Yarnlady Excellent point! Ewww is right.

@Yarnlady Now, if a 7 year old girl wants to pretend to be a grown up, she wears a halter top, cut offs, and dances around to the Beyonce video.

@tonedef I’m just glad I only had boys