How do I become friends with these people?

Just invite one or more of them over for a drink (coffee, tea, beer). You might consider having some awesome donuts or snacks to spring on them.

Maybe, get to know them individually first? It’s easier to get to know someone when there’s only a few ppl. I’ve been hanging around a group of about 15 ppl (then random accquaintances out of the group) but only are really close friends with about 5 or 6 of them. my group doesn’t always hang out altogether, it breaks up into littler groups. Altho i don’t know a lot of them as well as others, after hanging out with them in a smaller group, you get to know them better and see them differently and wanna hang out with them more.

After a few more times you hang out with that group, they’ll get to know you better and most likely invite you to hang out with them more. Eventually, you’ll be officially in their group. New places are always weird at first, it’ll all fall into place soon enough.

But i still think if you got to know them individually it’d be cool. or like, one day just be like “Oh, i’ve got nothing to do on _______, wanna hang out?” and then just… get to know them better. If you get to know one person at a time, it’ll be easier for them to get to know you, and for you to get to know them.
I dunno if that made any sense, i’m half asleep.. =|
lol. yeahh.. hope that helps?

Holidays are perfect for having people over. Have them over for drinks and to decorate the tree. Everyone knows you’re from out of town, so that’s a great reason.

You may want to try to make friends with them one by one, rather than the whole group. If it’s mixed gender, borrow one or two of the girls to “help” you shop for mom, sisters, etc. Take them to dinner. Give them a chance to get to know more about you in settings where they can focus in more on you. Then you can talk about the experience of leaving your social network behind and moving to a new place and having to start over. If they’ve never lived elsewhere, they may assume you have your own interests and friends.

You should also look to cultivate friends from other sources. Volunteer a few times a month so you can meet new people. The Animal Society is a great way to meet new people.

I don’t think asking a bunch of people out that you’ve hung out with is desperate at all. My experience is that if it’s just unnecessarily difficult to socialise then they might not be good friend matches. All my best friends I didn’t consciously ‘make’ but really we just ended up spending time together more and more.

Having said that I agree with curiouscat – you’re friends with people, not a group so when you spend time with them, actually converse with the people that you’re actually into being friends with. If you get to know one or two of them then they’ll naturally usher you into their group…

And if they use social networking (facebook, etc.) then use that to keep in touch, funny jokes, etc. Keep in contact…

I like Alfreda’s shopping angle, but would even extend it further. Maybe ask someone to show you the coolest places in town to shop for <insert items here>.

If I’m hearing you clearly underneath your question, you’re in a new place and wanting friends. That seems totally normal. You met some cool people, you want to be friends. And you don’t know why they don’t seem to invite you.

One wild idea is to assume you’re already friends with them. Not really, but in your mind, in your attitude. Just realize that you’re cool, you’re a good friend, and you’re already in. Then when you see them or hang with them, you have nothing to prove. You’re ALREADY in. And then, if you have a request or an invitation, from that place of assuming you’re already buds, it’s easier for them to hear. What do you think of that? Here are some more straightforward ideas:

-Have a housewarming party! You’re new, it’s a great chance to invite everyone you barely know without it being awkward.
-Make a request. Send out an e-mail to this group of friends asking for help in finding whatever you’re looking for. People like to help, especially a new person who is asking for help.
-Keep looking for friends. Don’t get stuck on this group of friends. You’ll be less needy when you’re with them. If they get you, they’re lucky. Good luck!

First, I REALLY lurved the sincerity of this question.
Also, a lot of great answers to this post… I’ll try not to be redundant:

The best way I’ve found to get “in” is to ask a lot of questions. You’ll learn more about their likes and generally most people like to talk about themselves. Helps if you’re genuinely curious.

The one thing that worried me in your question is you saying you “don’t really know any fun things to do.” If you can find fluther, you can certaintly google your interests and find places to pursue them in your city.

OR, instead of asking the group to hang out with you, ask them where you can do things that interest you. “Where can I see some great live folk music?” or “Where can I get some shade grown coffee” or “Where’s a good place to go rock climbing?”
It’s like a subliminal way of saying, “hey! I have interests!”—> then when they tell you, you can invite them along. If they decline, at least you have an interesting thing to do where you can meet people who become your friends naturally because you have interests in common…

Folks that are more open to friendship may be found elseware. I’d not put many of my eggs in the friend’s egg basket. Join a group or hobby club or place were to meet other folks new in town. This will be easier for sure.

You may also confide in your roommate that you are looking for ways to be more involved.
See if they will hang out with you and one or two of the larger crowd.

Ask them what they normally do for fun and then just suggest that when it hasn’t been done in a while.

Find something fun to do on your own and then tell them about it. That way you won’t feel or seem like you are just dependent on them to have a good time.

I never liked when roomates would “move in on my friends”. I’d be quick to put an end to that

I actually don’t like it when a new person comes, and then I intro them to my friends, and then they try to ‘take’ my friends too. in the end, after a while, we all become good friends and it all works out tho. Maybe if u wanna hang out with the other ppl individually, ask ur roommate to tag along as well, since it’s their friend. Or ask ur roommate to hook you up with some ppl and show you around.

Gonna go with the “find your own friends” answer as well. Don’t be a remora.

@knot, lurve for “remora”

i’m really stuck on the giving of good advice, but you seem to be getting along, maybe give it some more time? try and break the ice a bit more, and maybe things will be more…. donutty? like… more easier and more welcoming when you get to know them more, and they get to know you better too. or maybe… finding your own group is more… donutty? ....
mmm… maybe i’ll come back with some new describing words… i’m feeling find of lame