General Question

loveandmathbooks's avatar

What is your opinion of russian brides to be?

Asked by loveandmathbooks (18points) December 12th, 2008

suggestions, words of advice, anyone have experience on the matter?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

10 Answers

tonedef's avatar

From the way that you typed that question, I’m guessing that you’re a russian bride, and you’re looking for advice from other russian brides.

I don’t think there are any on Fluther, but who knows.

I think that the entire concept is a little too close to indentured servitude. Also, many women from Russia fall prey to human traffickers, who sell them into slavery.

loveandmathbooks's avatar

no, I’ve recently become in contact with a russian girl, I wasn’t out seeking a russian bride or anything like that.

From how I understand it, she’ll be heading to the United States with a VISA and what not to work. Some sort of work abroad program they have available to her.

My only concerns would be, social ramifications and things associated with it….how would you look at something like this as an outsider looking in.

wundayatta's avatar

Is this about a bride that is already scheduled, or is this a hypothetical question?

Usually brides from the bride importation business run into a common set of problems. So Russian, Phillipino, Thai, or whatever, most of this applies.

The women have usually signed up with an agency, and paid money to do so. They want to get the hell out of a place with a bad economy, or bad conditions, and find a rich husband to pamper them in the U.S.

American men often have the opposite idea. Here’s a woman who doesn’t speak English, and is beautiful, so she can be my maid and sex slave. When the two move in together, there is often a clash of expectations.

The women can not speak the language, so they are isolated and lonely. They did not imagine they would spend all their time working for their husband at menial jobs. They find the men they marry to be much less interesting than they were when they first met. The men find their women to be lazy and cold.

Often times, the women will stay with the husband long enough to get a green card, and then they’ll divorce and go back to the Russian community.

I’d say that overall, I think it’s a problematic thing, with neither the man or the woman getting what they want, and often a lot of disappointment and anger.

loveandmathbooks's avatar

@daloon I don’t think I would ever want to marry someone who doesn’t speak proper english. If she had an accent, that would be expected, but if she just wasn’t able to speak well, I would almost see that as a deal breaker.

I should note, she is mid 20’s and works as a physical fitness trainer. She intends to do the same here.

The word marriage has not even been brought up. I just assume at some point it will and was interested on a social impact this would have more than anything else.

But any personal experience on how it worked out, or someone you know that has done something of this sort would be great.

oasis's avatar

I would like them to stay in Russia.

Perchik's avatar

@mathbooks I think that if you love her once she’s here..and you think she’s right to marry, then society be damned, marry the girl. You’re clearly not paying for a russian bride, and she’s not coming over as a russian bride. Your friends will know that she came over for a job and should understand. Outsiders will see a [non russian man?] married to a russian woman. If her english is good, most people probably won’t even notice.

Knotmyday's avatar

Они, как Ницца.

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

I would think daloon captured it pretty well.

augustlan's avatar

I have no advice, but just wanted to say I love your user name…and Welcome to Fluther!

SeventhSense's avatar

@daloon
Sounds like you painted that one with a broad brush. I am sure that there are many Russian brides that are quite agreeable. The few Russian women I’ve know were very attractive, quite domestic, sexually open and very intelligent.

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