Problem! It's about this girl.

Invite her out on a date. If she says yes, have fun on the date, and ask her on another one, and repeat the process until the dates are no longer fun (at which point you break up) or you decide that you’re perfect for each other. If she says no, she’s not interested; move on to another girl.

I seriously think that she will say “no” though.

Then you can eliminate the asking her out part, and move on immediately.

I know this sounds cheesy but it gets to the point…

have a heart to heart with her, of course you don’t have to put on the cheese. just be like “hey, i really like you a lot….more than just a friend” then see how she reacts.

don’t be scared :)

I shouldn’t be scared really.

Get her a nice Christmas gift and give it a break until after Christmas.
What kind of “bad” thing might happen anyway? Are you worried about her hooking up with Joseph?
If that’s the case you won’t stop it by worrying or even by “trying” to stop it. Some things just aren’t meant to be.
I can tell you that people are atracted to happy people who enjoy themselves and don’t seem to need someone else to make them happy. Work on being happy in yourself and the girls will flock to you!!

@ jodi that really helped.
I’m buying her a Christmas gift.

erm…exactly how old are you? Not that it matters, because whatever advice we give you, you’ll mess up anyway, because that’s the proper way to do things…make mistakes and learn :)

I mean I’ve been trying this girl thing for at least a quarter of a century and still get it wrong most of the time.

But if you can be brave enough to just go tell her, you might be pleasantly surprised :)

As long as you are prepared to also face a disaster of course.

General advice in life: in situations like this, think: “what’s the worst that can happen?”. Then go for it. It is the only thing that ever worked for me :)

@ jack79 : i loved that answer

I’ve asked girls out before. every one I asked said “no”, but two girls asked ME out.

Talk to her friends. It will let her know that you’re interested (because her friends will tell her that you’re asking), but also allow her to keep things from being too awkward if she’s not interested. You can find out if she’s interested in anyone else and it might make her friends like you more. It’s always good to make an extra effort with a girl’s friends because they have to sign off on all possible boyfriends. Good luck!

I’m never into this whole “dive on them and tell them the truth” idea. All you’re doing is overwhelming her and forcing her to make a decision there and then.

Flirt a lot. Be obvious about the way you feel and daring in doing so. Don’t wait until you’re alone to flirt; just take the plunge and flirt; don’t fear her not reacting in the same way in-front of everyone. There’s nothing wrong with being a little competitive.

@richardhenry great advice. If someone I knew as a friend just came up and started telling me how they felt, I would probably think they were, at the most, stalking me, and at the least, a bit weird. I would be impressed with someone flirting with me first.

I think a good way is to write a short letter. You can say way you mean and think it out. Plus you aren’t in their face needing an answer. Just a simple note saying how you feel. That’s what I did and it worked :) Good luck.

Whatever you do, just don’t do nothing. I’ve done nothing before and I regret it. I also did something obvious, in fact it was a heartfelt confession of love kinda thing, and I also regret that. Obvious flirting and paying attention to her responses should give you a pretty clear direction. If she flirts back, keep at it, maybe ask her out on a date, you know, the romance thing. If she seems put off or uncomfortable, I’d say that means she’s not interested, so if you want to keep being friends you need to cut out the flirting and work on being friends only.

I think a letter is only a good idea if there’s already a small spark or if you’re really close. It sounds like you have some more impressing and making-her-want-you to do before you make any plunges and ask her to weigh up what she thinks of you, which is all a letter would do.

This is the same problem my current boyfriend of 1+ years had when debating whether to go for it with me or not. He was just so terrified of rejection and didn’t want to make a move that could scar whatever hope we had for a relationship in the future and having had the worst experience with girls imaginable didn’t help his feelings either He couldn’t discern whether or not I was “interested” or just on the “let’s be friends” track. Fortunately for both of us :) he took the plunge and, like richardhenry said, just flirted. It worked. Now he has my heart, and I’m not going anywhere. :)

…but with the gift, be careful. Don’t get her anything too outrageous… she’s already going to feel guilty for not getting you anything.

When I think back on the the guys I’ve dated and the guys who have asked me out but I turned them down, (and there have been quite a number of both over the years), the ones that walked up to me and said “Can I have your number” or “So, Chica, I really like you, will you go out with me?” always felt really awkward, and I tended to say no to them. The ones that flirted with me, told me I was cute, winked, smiled a little too long, those guys kind of made my heart flutter, and I seemed to say yes to them more. That’s how Tim won me. Well actually, he did that by telling my I was the most gorgeous woman he had ever met right after we shook hands He’s kind of unique, though.

Just kind of a summary of my thoughts and experiences – hope that helps!

I think this is all in your head, and you are creating this tension. Back off for a few weeks, and then resume your normal relationship with here after the play.

The pagaent is over and I don’t want to wait a few weeks! And it’s normal to have problems like these I don’t think it is tension, right?

Be yourself. Treat her good. If she can’t appreciate it, find a girl that will. You shouldn’t make anyone do anything, especially make a girl be attracted to you. It also kinda sounds like you’re making a huge deal out of this. How old are you?

14.
and sorry. I am making a big deal because the first girl I asked out I was as nervous as a 6 year old performing to 10000000 people. And that’s very very stupid of me.

Don’t worry, that’s not stupid. I’m 19 years old and have asked out a number of guys and I still feel like I’m going to faint every time I’m about to ask someone out.

I understand. But 14 years old and looking for a girlfriend? I don’t mean to be so blunt, so take this thought with a grain of salt.

I remember back when I was growing up, and remember all the people pairing off ‘getting boyfriends and girlfriends’ and seeing where they are now. Not a single one of them(obviously) stayed with the person they originally were attracted to. 14 years old isn’t that far away from adulthood, but there’s still some considerable learning that needs to be done.

Because of this, I can’t really give you a good answer. Ask her out, learn how its done. If you fail, you’ll know better for next time. If you don’t, you’ll still know better for next time. It’ll be a learning experience either way you go with this, just be sure to pay attention and take notes(not literally).

I know that, but that’s how it is in my life—all my friends do and so I say “when in rome”. It’s also about what I think. Some kids in my class dated at 3rd grade! I used to have a ‘girlfriend’ in pre-k (i actually kissed her) but then I never saw her again. :( oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh life

@kid Did you recently star in a WalMart commercial?

that was so mean!!! Don’t call me kid.

What an annoying advert.

I’m confused. Your name is kid, why do you not want to be called your name?

What’s the difference between 90’s Kid and Kid?

call me alex.

people generally go by your screen name, which is 90s kid and then, to save time, use a shorthand version of it as in “kid”. If you wanted to go by Alex, you should’ve used that as your screen name.

if you want to be called alex, why didn’t you make that your screenname?

but I am putting a substitute for kid..
Call me alex. Screen name is not the whole world.

@90s_kid: If someone who hasn’t read this thread starts seeing ”@alex” everywhere, they’re gonna be wondering who the hell alex is and to whom my reply is directed at. I’ll call you “90s_kid”, end of story and let’s move on now.

They’ll figure out eventually. I though of that though.