What has been the most defining moment of your life?

It wasn’t really a “moment” for me, but a relationship with someone.

I realized through this certain man that psychiatry would be the best thing for me to go into. He also started to teach me Latin and the importance of it. I also discovered England through him, and a few years later, I visited it (I have family there) and I realized that I would be much happier there I would in the US.

That was 5 years ago and he’s gone. But I’m still studying Latin and to fulfill my dream…

After working at one company in Ohio since I was 19 years old (total about 14 years), I told the owner of the company to go F*** himself because I was tired of his shit. In that moment, I traded in my “stable” job that I thought I would always have for a multi-year experience with poverty in Arizona.

There wasn’t one moment in particular, rather a series of related events that shaped my direction.

My birth was pretty defining for me.

Deciding to join the Air Force has changed my life. Doing four years in the Air Force opened the door for the good job I have now and I met so many cool people who now live across the world so I am able to travel to different places for vacation and to hang out with friends.

My college choice, spending several months overseas, my career/professional choice, choosing where I was going to live, my marriage and having my kids.

All of these choices were equally defining….made w/ considerable thought….they all were crossroads in my life.

My answer from an earlier question. :

Of course the births of my children affected me profoundly, but most of the ‘defining’ moments I can think of are not so pretty.

The day my mother allowed me (at age 7) to go to my child molesting uncle’s apartment, alone, I realized I was well and truly on my own. When I was 13, and took it upon myself to make him stop abusing me, I realized it was ok to be on my own…I was strong enough to survive it. As a result, I am an over-protective parent and never depended on anyone for years. When I fell in love with my second husband, and truly accepted that I could rely on him, I realized I was no longer on my own. With his support, I was finally able to end an awful relationship with my mother, and move on.

My therapist thinks the real defining moment of my life is buried in my past, when I was too young to be verbal—perhaps around the time my younger brother was born. Since I don’t remember, I can’t say.

@augustlan- Good for you. No one gets to pick their family so everyone should quit feeling sorry for getting rid of the shitty ones. I wish I had an overprotective mom growing up.

War. Driving 8mph and actively trying to find things people are trying to kill you with (ied’s) instead of doing the sane thing and running like hell tends to color your perception of life.

I was in the house when my mother killed my father. I was hiding in a laundry basket with a teddy (a polar teddy bear) bear when I heard the gunshot. That pretty much fucked up my life.

Oh, that’s awful JP. I’m so sorry to hear that.

@johnpowell: That is just terrible and tragic – I’m glad you have survived the experience, scars and all.

@augustlan: Good for you indeed. I’ve just learned this lesson myself (as you know) – there are a lot of toxic people in the world. Some of them happen to be family.

Sometimes I don’t always know what to say to things.
sigh [hugs for Augustlan and JP]

I’m sorry JP and August.

Thanks, guys.