When something good happens to you or when everything is going good in your life, how do you deal with feelings of uncertainty?

I think what happens is if everything is going well we know that it can’t last forever so we prepare ourselves mentally for a letdown. How much time you spend thinking about it depends on your personality. I almost never think about big things going wrong.

However when I get to work hitting all green lights, I find a parking space reght next to my classroom, find the copy machine free, don’t have any surly kids and finish up by 3:30, I just know something is hanging over my head.

Having minor challenges actually offsets that little frisson of threat you get on a perfect day.

I think what you feel is because you are responsible for the whole load. Wanting more is a result of meeting the goals you attained for yourself. You did all this, and you feel you can do more. On the other hand, times are tough, and being responsible, that’s impinging on your happiness.

@Alfreda, you’re right! I know that I have to maintain responsibility to obtain more, but that’s not the problem. A lot of my struggles were the result of the mistakes I’ve made, but I never stopped being responsible – if that makes any sense. I didn’t have much help, so I had to be or else I would have lost my mind and almost did! It’s just that now that things have finally settled down, I feel like there’s a ticking bomb somewhere just waiting to go off. I try not to let this take over me, but it does worry me at times.

There’s a good book on happiness that you might like—Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Gilbert. It’s not a self-help book, but is about how the brain works and the psychology of happiness. Like having things isn’t what makes us happy, but the pursuit and the anticipation of the event. One example he gave was winning a gift certificate for dinner at an expensive restaurant. The happiness comes from telling people about winning, and planning the evening—who you’ll take, what to wear, what to order. The actual eating of the meal is less important. Happiness is the ability to project into the future and anticipate what could happen, the planning. The problem is, extraneous circumstances get in the way and mar that future event, so it never comes out exactly like we imagine it would.

My therepist once told me that I lived as if I were always waiting for the other shoe to drop. And, I do! I think it’s just the way I’m made. I push those thoughts away as insistently as I can, but it’s not easy to give up being a worry-wart.

@Augustlan, I totally agree. I try to look at things in the way Alfreda has described, but that sucks! It’s like once things start looking up for you, you’re on a natural high! Unfortunately, what goes up…I sure as hell don’t want to come all the way down! But I guess I just have to realize that’s how life works…?

@joni1977 interestingly enough, the title of your question is exactly what I’m going through at the moment. Life is wonderful but I can’t be happy, instead I’m stressing over it.

I’m definitely interested in seeing more answers.

I understand were you are coming from and I am happy for you. But maybe planning for the bad things and knowing that you are prepared for the bad might allow you to enjoy the good more.

I keep enough to live for one year in very liquid assets. I figure I can sort my shit out in a year. So I don’t really have to worry about paying my bills or eating. In fact I just moved and am unemployed. But I am not worried. The flowers smell just as sweet.

I agree with LAN. I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop, perhaps because it always does eventually.
But, one thing I’ve learned:
Looking back brings heartache.
Looking forward brings fear.
Living in the moment carries the greatest chance of joy- though, you must be intentional. Take slow, deep breaths, relax, look for the joy in the day, practice gratitude.
Waiting for the shoe to drop robs THIS moment of the. Blessing that it is.

What a great statement, cdwccrn!

Life is never certain. Even in the old days, we had to store food against winter because good times don’t last. Lean years follow good years – and it’s best to be prepared. That edge of anxiety is what helps you not get caught short when it happens. It’s human nature.

That said, good years also follow lean years, and a new harvest follows each cold season. We just don’t feel the need to constantly prepare for the best, because it doesn’t require that much – just enjoyment. :)

Well I thank you all for your input and it’s good to know that I’m not alone. I have always practiced gratitude and I am enjoying it by living in the moment (yes, that was a great statement @CDWCCRN). I just have to learn to stop looking over my shoulders…so often. I’ll take a peek every now and then.

Be careful about living as if waiting for the other shoe to drop. I got so anxious waiting for it, that I thought that making it drop would be prefable to waiting so anxiously.

Thanks. This lesson took alot of painful years and tears to
Learn. I still forget to practice what I preach, though.

I think you might be waiting for the other shoe to drop. I think when good things happen, I’ve been rewarded by the universe for spreading goodness and keeping positive. It sounds like your life is balanced. I can’t say for sure that it will stay that way, life is life. But, keep an eye out, I would say. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best. I’m glad that you’ve found a happy place in your life.