How would humanity and human invention be different if humans had evolved with tails?

I don’t have an answer, but I’m looking forward to seeing the answers other people have!

I don’t know how it would be different, but it would be fun. I can think of people I’d like to grab by the tail. Thong underwear wouldn’t have ever been invented. tinyfaery, you often think about this? Thats awesome.
I personally would like to have one of those tails that you can swing from a branch with.

Ya having a tail would be cool, the main things the pop into my mind are would people have fur or lots of hair, I can’t relay thing of any animal that has a tail with no fur or hair on it…

This is a really interesting question. It would make our world different. That’s for sure. Fashion would definitely be affected—having a tail would give a whole new meaning to “coat and tail(s).” Would we wear long sleeved tail sweaters in the winter or do something absurd like “tail warmers?” Would brides need trains on their gowns? Would we wag our tails when we were happy to see someone or put them between our legs when ashamed? Would we put our tails around each other sitting at the movies? If so, we’d have a whole new means to express ourselves! Would we use them as another arm—dang, that’d be helpful at the grocery store, carrying books around campus, washing cars, holding your kids’ hands (or tails), swatting flies. They’d be so very useful and expressive—why’d we evolve out of them? Now I’ll be thinking about this often.

@suzyq: I wish I could give you more than 5 lurve. =)

I keep thinking about the chairs. They’d have to be made differently, probably some kind of side support for the chair back.

It would be like getting into those desks we used to have in school where you had to sit down from the correct side.

If we had kept tails, it would have been for a reason – because they were useful. This presumes that we’d have stayed in the same forested habitat as the common ancestor we had with other primate species.

If we were still in the forest using that tail, it was because we never had to leave – either the forests didn’t disappear leaving savannah (or we didn’t have an aquatic period). We probably would not have had to become as clever as we are, with our overgrown brains that brought so much benefit and so much trouble. We’d probably be very like our nearest cousin, the bonobo.

However, I don’t think it’s the retention of a tail that would cause us to live that way; rather that way of living which would have caused us to retain a tail (because those who had tails would probably have done better, reproductively speaking). If things happened as they did (with the forests shrinking, giving a selective advantage to the most clever) and we still kept tails, the would have probably become vestigial by now, much like our wisdom teeth or pinky toe. And I bet that people would be as embarrassed of them as they would be now by brow ridges, in a Neanderthal kind of way.

On the other hand, if anybody teased me about my tail, the urge to fling poo might be overwhelming.

lol4rl, aquatic ape. I love it when that pops up.

If I were to have a tail, I’d like it to be prehensile. It would be my third hand (or fourth, I use my mouth a lot to hold/pry things). The combination would result in my being sooo much more dexterous. And kinky possibilities abound.

I’d also like to have stronger erector pilli for making my hair stand up on end. I’d like to be able to make the hair on my head stand up like a cockatoo’s crest – whenever I was shocked by someone saying something stupendously stupid, pfftttt, up goes the hair.

And cats eyes – they fascinate me. Those oh-so-reactive pupils that expand and contract with excitement. I’ve always wondered if the world flashes brighter/darker/brighter as they prepare to pounce.

Could I also have adjustable melanin pockets in my skin so I can flash moving patterns of colors and shapes across my skin like an octopus or a cuttlefish?

So now I have this picture of myself – an agitated self waving a tail, with rapidly expanding and contracting pupils, flashing my crest with waves of colors flashing across my skin. Cool, hmm?

Ooh, prehensile tail would be a good thing! I would like to be able to convey emotion with it like a cat does. Fashion would become really interesting with a tail…

I’ve always wanted a tail! Now I want a cockatoo crest, too.

All chairs would have a hole in the back, like those weird orange plastic ones from the 70’s. A great way to tease some pretty girl would be to sneak up behind her and give her tail a gentle yank.

and the slang words, lordy, there would be some great slang about our tails.

Supposing we did have tails, we would probably have them for a reason. Since we walk upright, we don’t really need to have a tail for balance. Well, I can only speculate of course, but I imagine we would have spent a lot more time in forests if we had, say, prehensile tails. Such a tail would be useful for a forest dweller.

Of course, it is possible for a species to retain a body part even though it doesn’t need it anymore. As long as it doesn’t get in the way, it can be retained. It’s hard for me to imagine what it would be like if humans had tails. I don’t even know what kind of tail a human would have. Probably short and fleshy. I would want it taken off. Thank Xenu for modern medical science.