I’m a bit with petethepothead. My view of myself is the only one I know, and how could it be other than accurate? It is, after all, my view of myself.
Now, it seems like my view of myself does not correspond with others’ view of me. I tend to view myself as a distinctly unsexy, indifferently-looking fellow, who has ideas that are pretty different from most people. I believe most people would think I’m immoral (godlessly immoral, at that). This is one reason why I like places like fluther, because the people here, in my opinion, are not like most people.
Sometimes, I think I’m worthless, stupid, and undeserving of any good thing in life. Mostly I think I’m a failure. I don’t think I’m funny, but much too serious. I’m not very successful, either.
Sometimes people tell my my view of myself is distorted. I tend to think people say things like that just to be kind—a white lie. I believe I’m a forgettable person, barely registering on most people’s radar screens. Out of sight, out of mind.
I’m not a good friend. I’m lazy. I think and talk too much. I can’t follow through or complete anything. I’m obsessive. I’m scared of everything. I’m weak mentally, emotionally and physically. I don’t deserve to be alive.
Obviously, those are pretty nasty thoughts to think about myself. So mostly, I try not to think about myself. It’s extremely depressing to think about myself.
Oh, yes. I think I’m sneaky. Like if I get really down on myself, then maybe someone will say it’s not so. I do like to hear this, but since I’ve manipulated people into saying it, it doesn’t really count. So, I see myself as manipulative.
No one would want to be me. Although, they might want my life, but only if they could excise me from my life.
Is this accurate? It’s the way I see myself, so it must be accurate.