How do you refer to your neighbors without names?

“The Happy Clappy Black family” was one. (it was understandable to say black as they were the only black family on the street, so not a racist remark or something)
the happy clappy bit comes form them having christian group meetings.

The Guy down the street.
The plant lady.
The people with the dogs.
Stranger Danger.
The Spanish couple.
The Andy looking guy. (He looks like one of our old friends)

Tinkle and Toast.

She kind of tinkles like a bangle bracelets do when she walks. He is forever eating bread or toast when he comes out of the house in the morning to get the paper.

Wow! You have neighbors with no name? That’s just weird. I’m pretty sure all my neighbors have one.

The Boys (a houseful of about five guys who play in a punk band).
Fat Man (I know.. mean, but I didn’t pick the name! Honest.)
Bettina (we made up that name).

We have three neighbors we know by name – kind of.

There’s Chris and his wife and two kids (no idea of the wife and kids names)
There’s Pauline and the grandmother, aunt and uncle (again, no idea about the others)
There’s Joe and his wife (we don’t know the wife’s name and even though Joe has been dead for a couple years, we still refer to them this way)

And then there’s the two neighbors we don’t know:
Loopy guy and his mommy (older guy still home with mom. he’s a little wacky)
That guy (a portly fellow behind us who likes to ride around his jumbo yard on a four-wheeler, bare chested, with his toddler sitting between his legs and a beer in one hand)

@AC: Some neighbors you just can’t cross that introduction barrier to learn their name. For instance, the times when we are reminded we don’t know Kinky Athletic Sex’s name and know that she’s home aren’t really times we feel like we can go ask her.

Though you are right, I should have said “without using names”.

“Tinkle and Toast” – <snort> That’s awesome.

Lurve.

My neighbor’s had a lab that would jump the fence and always get into my garage can. I called the dog Trashdog. I would see his owners a couple walking Trashdog. I called them Trashdog’s mom and Trashdog’s dad anytime I saw them. Trashdog’s mom was hot too.

Cheerleader House (daughter was a cheerleader and mom was the coach….why did they have to practice their dance routines in the street w/ the music blaring?)

Jeep house – formerly known as the Meth house. (lots of people coming and going, they own a jeep….The new name seems nicer)

Swingers (‘nuf said)

Poodle people (freaky poodle owner who wants a playdate w/ my dog. Um. No. Thanks.)

The rest have been replaced w/ their actual names. I looked them up on the county auditor website.

I would recommend one of these…

Hi Neighbor…

Hi, I’m Empress Pixie, and you are…?

Matt and Katie, the frat dudes, the fat asshole in the yellow house, dude with the mustang, the people that live in the old store front place and the guy who owns the green house.

Skeleton man, the guy who is 6 feet 4 inches tall and weighs 120. Fire lady, the lady who tried to set the other neighbors house on fire 3 times in one week. (sent to a mental hospital for 30 days). Or ususally I call them by their dogs name as in “Rockys parents”.

Anyone else have a “crazy spying neighbor lady”?

seriously she knew when we painted out basement because of those little basement windows

@uberbatman Do you live next to my mom?

We have a crazy spying lady, but we call her Nosy Nellie;
we have Drunk Dog Walker lady, self explanatory;
The Blue Door Family, also self explanatory;
there’s Invisible Lady; who nobody has seen in 6 years (except when she got into a car with someone last October and left for 4 hours and came back, only to be invisible again);
and…The People on the Corner (very creative, I know!). But to counter those folks; my best friend lives right next door and we have a kick-ass gay-guy couple on our street that give the best parties ever! Lot’s of elderly people who love our kids, too – I totally dig my neighborhood.

Currently we have Crazy Old Bitch next door.
In the past I’ve been neighbors with:
The Child Molester (he really was…I’m glad he wasn’t there long!)
The Babysitter from Hell.
Drunk Landscape Dude. You know…the one who fired a gun inside his house.
Barbie and Ken.
The Peeping Tom.
Naked Guy (who actually banged on the door – naked).

@augustlan: Did you answer the door?

Next door we have Martin and Wife. Not sure if Martin is his first name or last name. We just smile and say hi.
Across from them is Yelling Family, who live at the top of their lungs.
Snowbirds live on the other side of us.
Cheesehead lives down the street a little ways, across from Brady Bunch Doors (self explanatory).
Behind us is Yappy Dog’s Family. The woman yaps even more than her little white rat, and she’s a complete airhead.
We also live near Becky Lookalike, who’s dog resembles my dog Becky.
Speed Racer lives down the block. Gestapo Guy is around the corner, across from Formerly Mister Perfect, a new neighbor who bought his house from a lawn maniac we called.. well, Mister Perfect.

angry man
mr nevercracker
the old lady on the corner
the christmas lights people
the people with the big dogs across the street
dude who over-fertilized his grass

i do know quentin and cathy because their kids play with mine and there’s a newlywed couple across the street where, for some reason, the dad, mr. pearson is always there. and marsha live next door. she’s married to angry man. hernando is on the other side and has a beautiful family we rarely see.

oh well.

@bythebay Hell no! I was like 12 at the time, babysitting my nice neighbor’s son. My friend and I were sitting in front of a window, when this guy flashed us from his apartment window across the way (both ground-floor apartments). We closed the blinds immediately, but being giggly teenage girls, we peeked out a few times. Next thing we know he’s banging on the door, demanding that we let him in, because he saw us looking and ‘I know you want it!’ We called 911, and since we lived in a bad neighborhood, the cops were there in less than 2 minutes. Caught the guy outside, completely starkers, while his wife was in their apartment, totally unaware that all this was going on!

As an aside, this was one of three naked men I saw outside while living in that neighborhood!

just a footnote here, because this is a great question, but when i was growing up on the south side of chicago in the 1970s, we knew EVERYBODY on the street by name. thanks, in part, i believe, to “block club parties” and neighbors who knew what you were doing (as a kid) and not supposed to be doing. what happened to that era? why?

Back home growing up we had (all nicknamed by the neighborhood kids):
The “Beaver” family – they all had buckteeth. :/
The “Bitch” – we filled her mailbox with horse shit on a weekly basis.
and The “Liars”

Now, in my apartment complex, so far my roommates and I have dubbed these two:
The “Loud Boys Upstairs” – obviously very loud, we think they wrestle a lot or something? and almost always drunk
and “Cute Truck Boy” – he’s hot, and drives a truck.

any musicians stumped for band names? i think you can get a lot of ideas off this thread.

@augustlan: the older neighborhood ladies might have appreciated all those naked men running around!

@dlm812 Was she bitchy before or after you started putting horseshit in her mailbox every week?

that would make me bitchy

@Snoopy: Before – she hated children and often said and did mean things to us because we would ride our bikes down the road, etc. – which is why we put the horse shit in her mailbox… but it didn’t really help the matter.

In my defense, I was the youngest member (maybe 7 or 8 y.o.), and therefore not the brains of this whole idea.

She eventually moved.

Nut Case on the corner.( a crazy woman who is always nosing into everyone’s business.)
Southern boy, (who lives upstairs and has a thick southern accent)
And the Clean Up Man (retired dude who likes to sweep out the dumpster area)

And let’s not forget “Clipboard Claudia” (who takes her pretend “job” on the homeowner’s association just a little too serious.)

@uberbatman, I confess that I am “crazy spying neighbor lady.” But that’s how I noticed the guys taking the TV out of the house, and called the police.

@scamp: Clipboard Claudia reminds me of a children’s book character. Perhaps you should write a book about her?

We know the names of all our neighbors except for the family that moved in down the street most recently. (Actually I just realized after I typed that that I used to know their names, but I forgot them, because) we always just call them trailer trash or those trashy people….

I’m not sure whether they would be horrified or not, honestly. I think they go out of their way to give that impression.

Outside of their house on any given day you will see:

-No less than 5 cars each one at least 10 years old and rusty-looking
-At least one car on blocks
-A bright blue cooler that has been on their front porch for almost 6 months
and
-TOILETS
(oh, and usually exactly one of their porch lights is burned out, but the other one is still on.)

I don’t have neighbors without names. We know the people directly across the street and all the rest of the “neighbors” are so far away that we can’t see their houses. Technically, we can’t even see the house of the people across the street, but we can at least see their mailbox and driveway. They’re the only ones, though.

We have the ‘The weird neighbor guy… the one on the left… no the other left’.
(Because both nextdoor neighbors are guys who are weird, but both for different reasons).

@dlm812 thanks for the idea! I just may do that some day. let’s see, what should I call it? How about Clipboard Claudia’s Classic Condo Capers? ( I’m open for suggestions, BTW)