Can you give permission for someone to have sex with your dead body in your will?
DISCLAIMER: This is not relevant to me nor to anyone I know! It is purely curiosity.
Sex with a corpse is illegal in most states, presumably because it could be considered rape, as the dead cannot consent to a sexual act. But what if you give specific permission for this in your will?
Let’s say you live in one of these states, and your husband is a necrophiliac. He does not act on his desires to sleep with the dead, but it is a fetish of his. You would like him to have sex with your body after you die. Can you specify this in your will, and if so, would your husband be exonerated from legal action if he were to have sex with your body after you die?
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166 Answers
It’s either against the law or it isn’t. It seems to be a matter of what state you fall in.
The gift that keeps giving…
I suppose only lawyers from each region could really answer this one, but I imagine it may be possible in theory, if other laws don’t prohibit it. This question makes a whole pile of others pop into my head that I probably shouldn’t get into right now though, lol.
I do think it would be better if the recipient were alive,i also suggest a bucket of liver if he dont want to break any laws.
Oh lord, this is something I never needed to ponder.
I have a breakfast cereal question removed and this gets play? {laughs and laughs and laughs}
perhaps I should have pursued the legality of coitus with my cookie crisp as opposed to how it reflected my personality
awww, the disclaimer took all the fun out of this question : P
Let’s back the bus up a bit; I’m not sure I would marry someone who was a necrophiliac in the first place. Why would I want to marry someone who might prefer me dead?
Who is to say someone won’t forge your will so they can make squelchies with you after your expiration date?
I do not need to think about this.
@asmonet – Then people could also alter your will to have you leave all you have to them. There’s a civil law notary involved for a reason.
@Vincentt: That scares me far less. I don’t want to be anyone’s Frankendate.
HELL NO, but that’s funny. I just saw Kill Bill last night.. and fucking Buck was paying people to fuck B while she was in a coma
I would imagine a state could prosecute the man for having sex with his wife’s consenting corpse, because the act itself is what is illegal and not whether it was consensual or not. I mean, logically your situation should be legal, but I’m not really sure why the law exists, thus the fact that it is consensual may not be justification enough to resist the law (for instance, if the law was enacted for corrupting the public or for the sanitary reasons, the act would still be breaking the law if consensual).
I have officially though way more about necrophilia than I ever thought I would. Thanks…? :)
I expect the list of people wanting to have sex with a stiff is pretty short!
It is illegal to give permission to break the law, and a medioaker attorney could invalidate the entire will if any part of it is illegal.
@DrBill: I’ve never heard of a Medioaker Attorney; is this an attorney who specializes in wills?
No, that is someone who barely graduated law school.
and took the bar seven+ times to pass
one person’s Ew, is another person’s Yowzier
What does a necrophiliac and an alcoholic have in common?
They both like a cold one.
Thats where Dead Sexy came from.
regardless of whether anyone would want to do something like that to start with, I would be really surprised if there is any state or country that allows such a thing. Because, contrary to what you seem to say in the question, it is not illegal because it is considered rape. It is illegal because it is considered necrophilia. And this in itself is a crime because you desecrate a dead body (it doesn’t matter whether you have sex with it or pee on it). A person’t body is considered holy, and therefore must be respected, even if that person doesn’t mind.
The above of course has caused many problems in donating organs, since it is basically illegal to chop up the body of a dead person (and especially one still in coma). But some states seem to have either found a way around it or turn a blind eye since it is for the greater good (and it is obvious that it was the deceased person’s will).
I couldn’t see this being legal at all. Some things in our society are considered taboo and will never be accepted. I know some things change over time (like how homosexuality was taboo in earlier decades) but there is something so universally nasty about screwing a dead body…doesn’t matter what culture you’re from.
Personally, I wouldn’t let it happen. I think my bf/future husband would need something better to do with his time instead of having sex with my remains. I couldn’t imagine that doing so would be good for the grieving process.
It’s only illegal if they get caught
It amazes me what some people are curious about??????
Hey whats all the fuss?
I have be doing this for years and she still loves it!
Do Stepford-wives engage in necrophilia?
Oasis—that was classic!
@oasis, you are SOOOOO bad, LOL.
@seekingwolf – I don’t see why it would be illegal to have sex with a corpse in a state that does not have a law against it, such as New York. Yes, it’s not accepted, but if there’s no law against it by definition it is a legal act. Of course, how exactly the person gets the body would most likely break certain laws (trespassing on cemetery or morgue grounds for instance). But in the hypothetical situation posed by the question asker, I have to conclude that if it happened in New York or other places with no laws against it, the act of having sex with the corpse would be legal and permissible.
I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
I died once. Fortunately I had such a clause in my will. My wife did her thing (fortunately, I had died in an… appropriate state). It was the darnest thing. I came back to life!
Eeyyyuh! I was looking forward to a roll in the hay with the wife in a bit, dampened my spirit.
I can’t believe 10 people thought this was a great question.
if it was legal you could make some money, sell hour tickets on ebay (needs a best before date stamped on them too), then when you die they just need to bring their ticket stub to your wake….. and lube
@NaturalMineralWater: Technically, it was. Despite content someone might find objectionable or unsavory it was a unique question that made us think. That’s why I GQ’d it, though other might see it differently.
Why does everyone think that having sex with permission is wrong? There’s legal consent, it is not rape.
Everyone has fetishes. Some people like to use toys, some people like to have other bodily fluids involved, and some people like having sex with dead people. Even if you like having sex plain and simple, some necrophiliac could think “ew” to the way you have sex. As @Mizuki said, everyone ha a different view on sex.
As for defiling the body, that only happens if you belong to a religion that taught you this, i.e.: Christianity. Someone mentioned that no other culture would want to do this, and that necrophilia is universally wrong. If that is the case, imprison every necrophiliac on the planet if you feel so strongly about it, which by all the responses in this thread says, you feel very strongly about it.
I say, bone that sack of bones.
OTOH, wouldn’t you want to know what they died of? What if it were catching?
squelchies? I always thought it was bumping uglies, but hey, I can work with squelchies. As for sexual preferences, the only one that strikes me as unnatural would be celibacy.
I GQ’d this one, too…even though I didn’t answer. I thought it was creative and it did make me think.
About things I really didn’t want to think about!
pancakes for being my gq twin.
I’ll share them with you!
are you also amused that every question concerning sex seems to boil down to pancakes now?
also, thank you, darling.
GOS—Know a lot of necrophiliacs, do ya? What happens if you get old and fat before you die, would any of your clique be interested then?
I can’t believe 12 people thought this was a great question. I think I’m in the twilight zone only… I didn’t hear any theme music.. peculiar..
How far will tolerance go is my question.. first it’s necrophilia.. then it’s bestiality.. then it’s..____ ? Isn’t there a line somewhere?! I never cease to be amazed at the antics of humanity.
Tolerance should be never ending as far as I’m concerned, so long as it involves two consenting people, or in this case, one consenting corpse and one consenting person. Animals cannot express consent, thus bestiality is not an issue of tolerance but an issue of animal abuse unless one can demonstrate that the animal takes pleasure from the act (which I’m pretty sure we can’t).
Furthermore, why does it matter to you what I choose to do with my body? If I had a thing for corpses (which I don’t), give me one reason why I shouldn’t be allowed to enjoy myself provided the corpse was consensually given. It’s the exact same as one’s preference for ice cream – just because I think Neapolitan ice cream is horrendous doesn’t mean I have the right to tell you not to eat it. It doesn’t affect you, thus you have no right to proclaim judgment over what I choose to do (or choose to not do). I’ll never cease to be amazed at how other humans take offense at things and concepts that don’t even involve them. Live and let live, people.
@dynamicduo Look, I don’t want to make a debate out of this, it’s not what fluther is for.. and this is a can of worms better left sealed..I’m just amazed that’s all..flabbergasted.. So you side with Dr. Kavorkian then? Do you think mass suicides are ok? They all consented right? I’m just appalled.. nay.. disgusted at the thought of boundless tolerance… and yes… that’s me.. of course you have your own take on it.. I’m not trying to stop anyone from having a roll in the hay with a lifeless corpse.. I’m just astonished, astounded, dumbfounded, open-eyed, open-mouthed, staggered, stunned, stupefied, surprised and thunderstruck that someone would want to… so sue me
@NaturalMineralWater, I have no desire to sue you, not sure why you’d think I would, maybe you’re an American? One of the purposes of Fluther is in fact to debate and to think hard about issues that we may not want to think about! This is not a can of worms that needs to be left sealed, you just don’t want to think or discuss the issue, and that’s your right to do so and I don’t think any different of you for doing so. You are free to stop following the discussion if you don’t want to open the can up further.
I don’t know who this Dr Kavorkian guy is, and I’m astounded that you would somehow assume I support an opinion or action I have never heard of. But I will respond to your suggestion nonetheless. Mass suicides, while somewhat consensual, are something I do not actively support, as many mass suicides are the result of being in brainwashing cults that prey on the weak or stupid, and these cults are set up in a way to dismiss or thwart any attempts to leave, thus it isn’t truly consensual in my mind. But it’s nonsense to think of banning cults, as the definition of a cult can change over time and depending on who is wielding that definition. So my final answer to this side question is both yes and no – yes people should have the right to kill themselves whenever or with whoever they want to, but no I do not agree with the existence of cults that encourage this behaviour so long as there is no easy way out for a now non-consenting member.
@dynamicduo
Dr. Kavorkian was arrested for assisting the elderly (consensually) commit suicide.I made the connection based on the information you provided about your viewpoint: “Tolerance should be never ending as far as I’m concerned”
“so sue me” is just an expression.. I have no idea what nationality has to do with that. If I were to honestly desire for you to sue me I’d be sadomasochistic and mentally deficient. (or know a good lawyer who could turn it around into a crazy, twisted counter-claim that I was emotionally scarred by the whole ordeal and needed compensation for the bereavement of my stability)
“you just don’t want to think or discuss the issue” actually I honestly thought that fluther was simply for questions and answers, not debates. Perhaps I should read the “What-is-Fluther” again. If it really does encourage debates, then bring it on.. I enjoy a good verbal battering from time to time.. it gets my brain sparking.
Brainwashing is exactly what has happened to you my friend, and many others in the form of toxic, never-ending desensitization to immorality. (such as the meager notion of seriously entertaining this question)
I’m getting off my soap-box now because I’m a very passionate person with concern to my beliefs and I often rub the fur the wrong way unintentionally. I’ve been in countless debates and they always end the same.. (no one changes their mind so the entire “process” is nothing more than a curiosity of psychology tantamount to the proverbial head hitting the proverbial wall)… that being said, I’d gladly continue to beat my head against that wall because I’m the kind of cat who is doomed to die of curiosity.
Interesting question, but makes me feel like bad at the same time. I would not give permission to have sex with my dead body for nobody.
Your conclusion that I have been brainwashed somehow into being tolerant and accepting of others made me laugh :)
Anyone think that the sperm would still try to give it a go?
Do you think that they would realise they had been had?
@NaturalMineralWater – Americans (at least over here) are often stereotyped as being people that sue about the littles of things :)
@oasis – GQ :P
Warning: sexist joke coming up.
So, six men and a woman ended up at an uninhabited island. They manage to gather some food and stuff, and they manage quite well for one week, two weeks, three weeks…
But then something starts to nag, so they come up with something: every day one of the men gets to have a go at the woman, and every Sunday the woman gets to have a day’s rest. This works well for a while…
But then the woman dies. The men still manage for a week, two weeks, three weeks… Then, finally, they decide it’s about time they bury the woman.
@Vincentt Ooooooooooooo! You baaaaaaaaaaaaad..
Surprised that the consensus seems to be that it’s wrong to have sex with a dead body because the dead body cannot typically give permission.
I’d’ve guessed that the foremost reason not to have sex with a dead body is that it’s likely to be extremely unhygienic. All kinds of nastiness commences upon the onset of death.
It’s simply not safe for you, nor for the society you’re a member of, for that behavior to be allowed.
That and it’s effin’ twisted and someone with poor self esteem really needs to get some professional help.
The first time I saw the question, I am like “oh my god!” but I just had to click on it to make it worse!
So, I think Rob is saying that everyone should wear a condom when having sex with dead people…
@Vincentt Where is “over here”? =D
@dynamicduo that’s it?
@robmandu No doubt… strange how people think they live in a vacuum and that their behaviors don’t affect anyone else simply because everything is labeled consensual
forgive me for not reading all of the previous comments and possibly repeating someone but,
I can’t help but think the reason behind it’s illegality would be not a corpses’ inability to give consent (I would trade all the rapists out there for corpsef*ckers any day), but that it would be desecration, ie vandalism. So theoretically, if permission was given, that might not count as desecration. Kinda like when shop owners pay graffiti artists to makeover their four walls. If he had the right lawyer mr. so-and-so could get his rocks off right before he says his last good bye.
and I agree, mr. so-and-so should wear a condom.
@fireside I’d bet you’re right if his profile is accurate.. which I try to ensure mine never is xD
@fundevogel it is basically two completely different arguments.. legality vs morality .. I say who cares about the legality issue because of the morality issue.
I guess that’s the tricky thing about law, the potential difference between its intent and its action.
@Vincentt I can’t argue with that.. it’s true that there are quite a few pathetic Americans who like to sue.. I’m just not one of them
@NaturalMineralWater: Greed is not something confined to Americans. People file lawsuits all over the world.
I’m no expert, but I’d guess it depends entirely on what state/ country you live in. But morally I don’t see a probelm if both parties consented, although it’s definitely not my thing—call me old-fashioned, but I prefer a warm, responsive partner who is also enjoying the whole experience (or at least doing a good job of pretending she is!)
so then, we have decided that prying the lid off the urn and making ‘joy juice’ into it is illegal AND immoral? Glad that’s settled.
I’m not into recycling that much.
I fucking hope not. Does anyone want to think of their neighbor getting busy with a dead body?
Every year 15 million children die of hunger, but we’ve got to spend our time thinking about some one in a million spouse who want to fuck their cold dead mate.
hmmm… interesting (?) question.
i really wonder why you spend your time thinking about this… and also i wonder why i am now.
Write it in your will?
Bring this to the courts, fight the man!
I dont see any reason why one of them being dead would prevent two consenting adults from being able to fuck
I’m no lawyer. So I’m not sure. My guess would be NO. This reminds me of a comedy sketch by David Cross where he expressed a desire to allow himself to be gangbanged by necrohiliacs after death as a way to make himself useful and to not be selfish. Also he’s pro-organ donation. So…there’s that.
If they had married for a while, what difference would it make if the wife were actually dead?
Because death trumps marriage. Remember, “til death do you part”?
Whoa, has ratboys response been here for awhile? I’m shocked no one has said anything about it!
A woman’s husband is a necrophiliac. That’s one. She knows it. That’s two. And she leaves him permission to f*** her dead body? I am not ordinarily profane, but no other expression seems to fit. Just on general principles, such a will should be challenged in any court.
I shared this with my mother, and I think she had a great answer.
“It disturbs me to think that it happens often enough for there to be a term for it!”
I died laughing at this one! Ummm, no, not really dead, Get back! I said get back!!!!!
A decomposing body is a health risk. Because of that I would have to say NO. Someone is going to take possession of the dead body, they being the ones to allow you or not. Unless you know that person and they are willing to turn their back. If you get sick, they are to blame for allowing you to do the dirty, very dirty deed.
Beside, do you want your last memory to be of famaldihide and decomposition? I am turned off if it is not smelling fresh down there.
Till death do us part. Move on. Learn to let go of things. Not cool.
Clearly it’s an untested legal area which the courts need to decide. Any volunteers to be the boinker or the boinkee?
Over my dead body…
oh, wait
okay, first of all I am disturbed that I am even analyzing this, however, we do not know how we are going to die. If the wife dies traumatically, like a car accident, gunshot wounds, eaten by a shark, why would her loved ones want to view the body, let alone spend private alone time with it. Also if stated in a will, by the time the court is done debating its legality, the corpse would be beyond stiff.
cum wile it’s still fresh
Sounds like a Chuck Palahnuik novel (Lullabye I think).
isn’t it kinda gross? and besides, how about the hygiene issues?
I’m pretty sure my ex-wife was dead when I would have sex with her.
if this is what you both want , so be it. but state law may prevent it from happening. Makes me think of an old song by Alice Cooper, Cold Ethel, hey there is a lot worse in this world than necrophelia
I’m so glad someone replied again and resurrected this question. It’s something I think about all the time. I am curious as to the answer to this question globally, and the legal aspects of it from State to State. It is a vital question, and I think more people should take the time to find the answers.
What is life all about anyway?
Ultimately, it’s all about the sex after you’re dead, right?
20 gq’s… (vomiting noise). I think fluther’s moral compass is broken.
@NaturalMineralWater How does that mean their moral compass is broken if its all consent?
I just made it 21
I wouldn’t give permission at all. That is violation of personal rights. And, that’s sick too.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha
@tandra88 It wouldn’t be a violation of rights if you wanted them to do it.
…I stopped following this question months ago…
Makes me wonder how any of my questions got modded…
Hell….most of us have had problems having our husbands have sex with us when we are alive sweetheart.
I’d rather let him pine away for what might have been.
After death is one thing, but while living the act could make you dead if your heart is not up to the challenge.
After death, better to be recyled naturally and mixed with potting soil.
Plant a cherry tree
Eat me.
laughing, laughing, laughing my socks off
My opinion on this question is that I am deeply disturbed. But how would this be executed it the husband was granted permission to have sex with his dead wife? What if she died say in a restaurant or at a friend’s house, and the husband is not with her? She will be brought to the morgue, and what would the husband do, just show up and ask for a little alone time with the body? Where would this take place? shudders…
Is this not the best Fluther question ever? There should be an award for visiting here.
LOL I think the hardest part would be convincing the dead partners family to leave you alone with them for a few hours!
If you’ve got their permission and it’s what they want… well… I guess it’s ‘ok’?
When it comes down to it, they’re dead – so the only protests will be from living people!
You think he would still be all horny even though he is grieving?
Brings new meaning to lets grab a cold one. Didn’t have time to look over all the answers so hope someone else didn’t use that old necrophilia joke.
@Just_Justine Think of it from a guys perspective: Eternal erection
@Adirondackwannabe isn’t that the girls perspective? Now I’m confused and thinking about it. Which I didn’t want to!
this question is just sick
@pwincess99 – which leads me to wonder, if it’s so sick, what exactly were your search terms tof find this 14 month old question?
just sayin’
because i was looking through the sex collective! :) thats why :)
@pwincess99 – ahhh, all makes sense NOW. I was just jerkin’ your chain anyway, welcome to Fluther.
OMG! Is that you, Chexie?!?!
Yes, that would certainly wake me up from death! Rigor mortis——perhaps—- with most of my body, but most definitely with my penis! Lol.
Response moderated (Writing Standards)
To quote a few Flutheren…...Ewwwwww!, Eeyyyuh!, Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew!
Well, if I’m cremated, it will be a little difficult for someone to have sex with me in the “dust”! Lol.
Some may think it’s dead wrong.
Makes you wonder what someone said for them to be modded!
What about when morticians have their way with a cold one?
MMMm… okay, here in my country a corpse no longer has natural nor legal existence.. it’s actually a “thing” inanimated thing… so, in that order of things ..you would have to figure out who would be the owner of the corpse. and the owner, is legally allowed to do anything with the “things he owns”...but then again, here, there are laws that specifically forbid to do anything with corpses.. so.. no way it’s not legal. jajajajajajaj .. funny and actually interesting question jajajajja!
It would take at least a year for your will to go through probate.
Your corpse might not be at its best.
I have read over 11,000 questions on this site and this has to be the weirdest one yet! That’s all I am gonna say.
If by weird you mean great, I concur!
I love that this question still gets found.
@augustlan – I wish there was a better way for older questions to get found more often…
Was this the question of the year?
So..if the husband is a necrophiliac, and if the wife gives him permission to have sex with her body, how is that gonna happen? The wife’s family won’t let him do anything..
GQ
Anyone else getting as turned on as me?
What if this question were reversed?
Would Viagra be useless?
In other words, would Viagra be benefical for a male corpse?
Why does this question only have 33 GQ’s? Shame on those of you who have visited here and not given up the lurve.
I don’t know, but that is A WEIRD QUESTION. What made you even think about this?
I’d guess no, since it’s illegal. Even if you put it in your will, I still think it would be illegal.
…...... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. BAD MENTAL IMAGE. BAD MENTAL IMAGE. BAD MENTAL IMAGE. (repeat)
Hey I just found this one…hysterical thread… thanks for the laughs…I don’t know what everyone is going on about…why wait until the Will is read, just get on and shag her already, that way she’s not going OFF whilst you’re going OFF!!!!! HAHAHAH… Sorry:( couldn’t resist)
General? Funny as, I just read the pooping thread as well and have just pulled myself back up from the floor from that one ROFL. I couldn’t even see the text on the screen I was crying so much! GOS is a gem for coming up with these beauties.
Saw this and thought of this thread.
^ Oh the good old days of Fluther! lol ^^^ @AstroChuck ‘s article is a classic.
Wow. Seven and a half years later, I count only four of these responders who are still with us and two more who are with us rarely.
Rarely is better than never!
7 and a half years, this Q. is a pretty mummified corpse by now. haha
@Vincentt Wow. Welcome home. Make that three who visit rarely.
Wow. Working up a hot sweat over a cold corpse. Literally.
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