Most embarrassing thing you've done recently?

I left my spankerchief out and my girlfriend found it.

wet the bed

This past weekend, I was in Portland for a wedding. My hair normally takes like, 4 hours to dry and I prefer to air dry it, but I wanted it to be done by the wedding time. As I was roaming around the streets, I suddenly found this laundromat vent blowing hot, laundry-scented air out onto the sidewalk, and I hatched my plan.

I splayed out on the concrete underneath the vent, took some things out of some grocery bags that sat by me, and started texting on my phone. I sat there for some time drying my hair, when around the corner came two clearly, homeless men with plates of food in their hand.

”Uh, can we have our spot back? You’re sitting in our spot” they said.

I apologized, nervously packed my stuff into bags and realized how crazy I must have looked.

”If you’re cold, you can stay here with us” one of them said, and embarrassed, I wished them well and headed back for my hotel.

My jacket was hooked on the car door and I walked out of the car and I fell on the ice. This was in front of many people, many of whom are or were in at least one of my classes.

I peed on figbash’ bed. Whateves, it happens…

@peedub: What was probably even more embarrassing was that when I went to clean it up I mistakenly grabbed “Spanky” – your favorite tube sock.

I told some girl I barely know that she “tans entirely too much” and that “she should realize it doesn’t look good”. Haha I was drunk of course and later apologized to her but I certainly felt like an asshole.

Who gave you lurve for that one? Spanky’s ok with a good pissing.

I couldn’t think of anything. Now I’m thinking something disgustingly embarrassing is going to happen in the near future. I’m stoked, haha.

Oh! The other day in conversation, I was talking about how nice this girl I work with is with another person I work with. The girl’s last name is Sweetwater. I was trying to remember her name while we were talking about her and I was like “Oh yeah, that blonde haired girl, Jessica, what’s her last name? Jessica Sweetbottom.” The lady I was talking to started cracking up and I was like wtf why was that lolworthy and I was like “Wait..did I just say Sweetbottom?” And the lady was like “Careful you don’t go around calling her that.” Needless to say I felt like a tart.

I was hanging with my brother and his wife, flying all day across the country. At one point I started humming this random tune. They both looked at me, and my brother said, “Do you know that’s the typical theme song for porn?” I didn’t, I had no clue where I’d heard it. Face turned beet red.

posted a somewhat-insulting post on fluther insulting the intelligence of another user, only to find out that it was I, not she, who was 100% and completely wrong.

I fell off the exercise ball in a class at the gym. I landed with a thud and the ball went bouncing into another, unsuspecting member. I’m SOOO coordinated. Not.

LOL Probably had the lock on my door swing open at my school restroom and everyone see my using the toilet LOL