If an interent date flies down to meet me is he hoping for more than coffee?

Let him know your intentions and feelings before he/she makes the trip.

If I was traveling that far, I’d be hoping for a lot more than coffee. As basp said, let him know beforehand.

Duh. Yes.

uh…yeah I’d better be getting more than coffee…. If I was flying through an area for business purposes, and I had time enough for a date with someone on the internet, I would probably treat it the same as any normal internet date.

“welp, maybe I can get a run in” —-Burn After Reading.

re internet dating – how far in kilometers would a guy travel to just expect coffee with yet unseen internet date? Is there some sort of limit?

First of all, you may be the one expecting more than coffee after you meet him, ever thought of that? And please tell me you have at least exchanged RECENT and REAL photos!

Secondly, if I had to make a rule of thumb, I’d say a couple of hours’ travel (assuming money was not a big issue) is something I’d gladly do for a casual cup of coffee with a new face, without any strings attached. But yes, for 300km I would certainly be hoping to meet the love of my life. That doesn’t mean that you have to be that person, but it sure means that this is what he’ll be hoping somewhere deep inside.

3OOKM wow get the guy a couple of TWINKIES to go with it!

People will do extraordinary things to get laid. People generally don’t do extraordinary things to get coffee.

When you meet him remember that no matter how sweet, funny and understanding he appears to be on the Internet, he is a stranger. Also, he only shows (just as you did) the aspects of himself he wants you to see.

Finally, why are only his expectations setting the tone here? How about letting him know what your expectations are before agreeing to meet him?

@Marina & @laureth – Indeed. Exactly what I was thinking, but in different words!

If he is looking for love on the internet assume he IS A WEIRDO.

The internet’s as good a place as any to look for love nowadays. It’s better than a bar, imho, because you have a chance to get to know the person from the inside, where it often seems like pickups at bars are all about T&A.

I couldn’t agree more.

@laureth – LOL!

,make sure you get a picture of them before you do anything, and even then keep in mind that it could be several years old, before they had kids, gained 20 pounds or maybe even not their picture at all. It’s very easy to convince yourself that they’re something special, and get disappointed when you find out they have a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp.

meeting people offline is sooooooo much better

of course, this is just IMHO

I have met 6 girls (including my current gf) through the internet, either directly or (more commonly) indirectly, ie on sites such as this one and not in an effort to flirt.

1 was horrible in person, saying things which directly contradicted the impression she gave online
3 have been my RL friends for over a decade, and I got involved with one of them romantically for a few months (after being friends for over 4 years though)
1 was too fat (I mean sumo wrestler fat, not just overweight)
1 am I still together with and it has been a very fulfilling relationship so far

So overall I agree with laureth, in reality only 1/6 was a complete disaster, even though the fat girl could have been more honest

It’s possible that he is hoping for a lay when he gets there. Then again, perhaps he just wants to see if he can take the relationship to the next level – that is, meet you in person to see if you guys connect as well in person as online. If there’s a chance of the relationship going anywhere, it’s a step that has to be taken at some point.

That said, be very careful. As much as you might think you know him, he could be something entirely different. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.

I know 3 people who married people they met on eharmony.com. One came from the UK to the US. All three couples have been married for 3— 5 years, and seem relatively happy.

You’re doing both of yourselves a great disservice by not telling him up front what the conditions or limits of this meeting are.

Basically, no, no one travels on a plane ride just to have coffee with an internet stranger. They travel that far to have sex with an internet stranger.

You must be some hot stuff, jellyfish! If nothing else comes out of it, you have a story to tell one day. “A guy flew 300 kilometers just to sleep with me. Because I’m. all. that. Yeah.”

All cool answers – I just know that all this pre meeting email stuff can be an illusion and we want to know asap if it will work in real life – so we need to meet and if he’s not local he needs to travel a fair way – so then too many expectations come with the distance! I made it clear I may not be up for more than coffee. He is still coming!

I say all good then. Just be careful and hopefully everything works out for the best. :o)

well it is best for both of you not to expect too much, but keep all options open and you might be pleasantly surprised :)

Depends on the Coffee

We met – it was fabulous – we just clicked in every way – and we both kept our clothes on – so thanx for all the answers

Did I ask him if he was hoping for more than just coffee?

so are you going to meet again? Is it moving forward? Or was it just a one-coffee-stand?

It is the real deal – we are planning a trip to Ireland and are totally committed – he is planning on moving here in nr future. I know it seems unlikely but there u r -we talk every day for at least an hour and text about 10 times a day. he came down earlier than planned and I am blown away – my son has his nose out of joint a little tho – u get that. Heaven on a stick!!!!Totally worth hanging out for a fabulous loving guy and a 11/10 kisser. And its mutual!!

Happy for you jellyfish. So internet is not that bad after all, is it? Remember to invite Al Gore to the wedding ;)

I’ve always said that meeting people online is a good idea, since you start inside-out, ie with the person’s character and common interests first, rather than the way they sat on the barstool or what sort of cleavage they wear.

thanx jack -