How, when, and why did you decide to live the way you do?

Right now I live my life based on my income and the opportunities I’m pursuing. For example, my partner is in school, and I am paying for both of our lifestyles. This is limiting the way I really want to live, but I know that it’s an investment for our future, and in one year’s time we will be able to take giant leaps forward towards our ultimate goals.

As for what those goals are, some are concrete goals which we agree on, some are goals we pursue individually. Some change from time to time, new ones added on, old ones taken off. They change based on our life experiences, what we learn, and what we observe going on in the world. But there is always a goal. It is what keeps me going during the darkest of times.

I am in the second step on a 3 step plan. I will live the way I want to once this phase is complete. I’m a little behind schedule, but I am being patient, because I learn as I go.

Everything I am, and everything I do today, is because of my past. My mom was abusive and sheltered me. I have three siblings, but still. It was just me. I was verbally, mentally and physically abused. Ever since I left her house I decided I needed to experience everything she never let me, and more. Since I left in June ‘07, I’ve been to 17 states, (18 this Sunday), Lived in 4, and also have lived in another country. I don’t want to be someone who works their whole life. I want to explore, see things that not all people get a chance to see, and more than that, I want to make a difference in other peoples lives, for the better.

Instead of being depressed over my past, and abusing drugs and all that because I felt bad for myself, I took a step back and realized that what I need is to really start LIVING.

@chelseababyy thanks for your post. You sound like one gutsy lady. I don’t understand one sentence tho..

you said: My mom was abusive and sheltered me.

Would you expalin what you meant by that please? Do you mean sheltered as in put a roof over your head, or protected you?

I am living in a way that is not intentional, but I am not unhappy with where I am. I decided several years ago that I wasn’t going to regret things that happen to me if I don’t have control or if something doesn’t go the way I planned. It’s a waste of energy to regret…instead you just have to keep moving forward.

I don’t know where I want to be in life…I moved to London immediately after graduating from college with a 6 month work visa in an effort to find a permanent job and relocate entirely; their job market is currently worse than ours so….didn’t really work out, but it was a brilliant experience and I wouldn’t change it for the world. Now that I’m home I have little to no direction and am just trying to find a job that will pay the bills for a while so that I can sort things out.

I’m going to live life and even though things don’t work out and stuff goes wrong and I don’t know what I really want….I’ve decided to be happy no matter WHAT happens or where I end up.

Sorry. Was multitasking while writing.

@scamp, sheltered meaning would not let me out ANYWHERE. Not with friends, not anywhere, not even to go for a walk around the block. Then when she started to get abusive I tried running away because I just couldn’t handle it and there was only so much Family Services was willing to do, especially because they never believed a word I said about my mom, because she put on a show for them. She ended up telling them that I was ‘just being rebellious’, which wasn’t the case, I just didn’t feel safe within the household.. At that point she took me out of school (in which another way I was sheltered, I had no phone, no friends except those in the outpatient program and didn’t talk to anyone. Plus all of that made me become a lot more reserved, and not so much outgoing), put me in an outpatient program at a mental hospital, and finally after a few months, and lots of therapy sessions, my insurance wouldn’t pay because the therapist said there was no need for me to be there, and my mom was the one with the problems.

But now, I’m me. That’s all I can be. And I’m PROUD to be who I am.

I think we make decisions every day about how we want to live, what we want to do, and who we want to be. Some decisions I made decades ago affect my life today, and some decisions I made today affect me now and will in the future. Some people feel more comfortable following complex, elaborate plans and others feel more comfortable taking the next logical step and going from there. Some people’s intention might be to wing it. It’s still living with intention.

@chelseababyy thanks for clearing that up for me. I’m sorry that you went through such hard times, but it sounds like it has made you a much stronger person. I think you have a great attitude. Kudos to you for not falling into depression drugs, etc. You have every right to be proud! The world is your oyster baby.. go for it!!

@scamp You’re quite welcome. It’s okay. And you’re right, I’ve become a LOT stronger because of it. And I also realized who I really am. I figure coming out of what I went through with my head up and my hopes high will not only be better for MY future, but it kinda also shows my mom that I’m better than what she tried to tell me I was (which was ‘nothing’). A lot of my family didn’t believe me, and went with what she said, because she is an adult, and I was not. It feels good to show them that I am way more than they ever thought I could be. Goes to show, people can go through anything and come out okay. Pitying yourself just doesn’t make sense.

Thank you for the compliments.

the only ‘way’ i live is as fairly as i can. i do what i can to make others comfortable, and try not to lose sight of my own interests in the process.
i’m trying to take things more easily though. i think i tend to care too much, or get too involved, in a lot of things to the extent that i get overwhelmed. i guess i’m working on changing that. but really, i just take things as they come, or i try to anyway. i’m trying to make plans that allow me to enjoy the life i’ve got and do what i can for other people, without being completely unrealistic.

Well…we didn’t have a choice. Life was just going along fine, actually everything was pretty darn great – then I got cancer and life changed – a lot! We went from being this family that went places, did a lot of things, did projects together, to slowing down. I even had to start asking for help. Not my strong point. I’ve been in and out of the hospital and had to hire a nanny to help with the kids. We have one in high school and one in kindergarten. Of course, the nanny was temporary – because I like raising my children.

Everything used to be just so and now, there is a bit of chaos, here and there.

The funny thing – we’re all happier.

OK!! as “The Company” per say , I do not belong. Period!!.
Everyone is already “bought and sold”. OOOOh, if you’re at this level, it’s good. If you’re at that level, you are accepted!! Hey!! what degree are U at? Well, Hello Bullshit!! FU!!
I(‘m sick and tired of all this “Ball Games” going on that so is such a Fuck against the face of America, it aint a pimple. Hey!! I’d rather see a nice bunch of smooth tits instead of some MFking assHole Faces of dead presidents carvred out in granite in Mount Rushmore. Hey, We have to express our outrage too.
So, I live My life….......... in spite of you!!
FU!! me nobody freom Minnesota.
and if you want to wake up into you’re real reality,
just say “No” to your dream fuck. You may just graduate and wake up to what actually is!!
Hello!! What’s Your name?

Though i am not super rich, i am physically fit and emotionally happy.. This is my life and i am very happy of what i have now..

My daughter was taken on Christmas Eve. I decided to quit my jobs and get her back. I spend half my day contacting different people and organisations and the other half trying to forget about the whole thing and stay calm. I travel back and forth between different countries and have already spent a fortune, but I hope it will all end soon. I will go back to work in September, by which time I hope to have her back.

I have tried some things and observed other things as I have made this journey. I have moved toward things that have been pleasing and away from what was painful. I have been handed some unexpected challenges and dealt with them the best way I could. When I have made mistakes I have tried to correct them with the least possible collateral damage.

So I guess you could say my life is intentional because I have always been thoughtful in my choices

@Jack79 – Wow. I won’t even try to say more than I do hope this nightmare ends for you, as soon as possible. You will remain in my thoughts.

@Jack79, I am so sorry to hear about your daughter! I will pray that you will be able to find her very very soon!

it just came up it self.I honesty did not choose my live.I choose just the place where to live.The place I choose because it seem to me right to be on.The another stuff is just a luck of liveing

life as a whole happens so slowly…i mean…no maybe not slowly but SO many things and events happen and occur that i think it’s so complicated. I do think of my life sometimes as a series of unfortunate events, but am gradually beginning to take control (and reminding myself that it IS my responsibility!) of it now… but again this is happening so very slowly…it’s very ,much like three steps forward two steps back

thanks for a reminder though as to kick myself up the butt again and reevaluate my intentions x

@lynneblundell: At least “three steps forward two steps back” is better than “two steps forward three steps back”. Cheers!

The way I’m living is by plan and intention, with a specific goal but it’s not by any means ideal. The end goal is worth it to me in order to secure the financial stability of two people instead of just one.