What story can I tell the Apple store about why my phone looks like a lava lamp?

“I went to use it and it looked like this”

If you are going to lie keep it simple.

As simple as possible is the best bet, that way you don’t accidentally change your story half way through. @johnpowell has the best, most simple response.

I don’t remember?

Tell them you don’t know what happened to it.

Say that an Apple Store rep broke into your house at night and did it. That way they’re obligated.

The truth?

@cdwccrn See my post.

Accuse The Jobs of urinating on it. They’ll probably give you a new one, and a new iMac just so they can keep it as a shrine.

Speaking of new iMacs, I actually like the way they’re using i7’s in this last batch. Still not nearly as fast as my new PC, but a huge improvement.

Yeah, I would go with jp’s suggestion.
But maybe imply that you think what really happened was something along the lines of what richard suggested.

Ask them if you should even be touching it or if this is some kind of battery acid seeping out.

Or maybe don’t be a lying scumbag and tell the truth? Do you really think they are stupid enough to believe stories like that? I worked as a technician in the Apple store and got lied to every day by customers trying to get free stuff after they poured milk or wine or what have you in to their computer or ran over it with a truck. Why not just take a little personal responsibility and actually pay for your mistake?

Applecare is not insurance, it is an extended service plan. It does not cover user damage, it only covers manufacturing defects for an additional year. Filling your iPhone with suntan lotion or whatever it was that you spilled in it is not a manufacturing defect and the damage is your responsibility, not Apple’s.

Steve Jobs? Who else would give a fuck?

Apple people worship him. It could be a religion.

Great. Just what we need, another religion.

I just hate when people try to get something for free and when they don’t take personal responsibility for their actions. I also worked as a technician in the Apple Store for 2 years and had customers try to lie to my face every day like you plan to do, trying to get something repaired for free after it was so obvious that they had damaged it themselves. I’m also an Apple shareholder and every time someone talks a technician into giving them something for free even when they obviously don’t deserve it, it’s simply another cost to the company.

Good for you. I’ll just consider it repayment for my 1st generation iPod click wheel that NEVER worked, and that Apple would not replace. Get over yourself.

Did they fix it?

Haven’t gone yet. I’ll get to it over the weekend.