I think this is horrible timing in life but why now?

Every guy’s line after a break-up is true with you. “Bitch was a fuckin’ lesbian anyway.”

Go with it man. If you actually “turned her gay” then she’s retarded.

No if she’s into chicks, she’s into chicks

It has nothing to do with you. Repeat, it has nothing to do with you.
You cannot change someone’s sexuality. She is who she is. Perhaps she was hoping she could be heterosexual while she was with you. She’s not… and it has nothing to do with you.

Oh hunnie, please don’t blame yourself. You can’t control the actions of others. It is what it is and it won’t do you any good to be hard on yourself about it.

Just out of curiosity- I’m confused about who broke up with who?

well. she broke up with me. we had been dating for about 3 years.

You can’t “turn someone gay”. People can’t help how they feel. This isn’t a rare thing either. I’ve heard a lot of people who have been in heterosexual relationships find out that it’s not what they want.

@KrystaElyse totally. My boyfriend has two exes who are now in relationships with women. And, kiev749, I am SURE his bedroom skills have nothing to do with it. I’m sorry you’re going through this, it must be hard.

yeah…. it kinda sucks. but shit happens is the way i’m lookin at it. my bro’s are all givin me crap for it, i thought i would consult some intellectual people. Thanks all.

@Kiev749 Don’t let your buddies give you crap. I bet if it happened to them they wouldn’t appreciate it much! Keep your head up and you’ll meet someone else :)

@Kiev749 – Your friends are ignorant. Let them know that they are totally immature. Break ups are never easy, and you can never be prepared for them. Time heals all wounds.

Sounds like she just moved on, fell for someone else. Maybe her orientation is irrelevant.

People’s sexual prefferences are not defined by one specific relationship… you don’t “turn” someone gay… if they discover they’re gay chances are they had doubts for a while… or suspicions… or were never really comfortable in their own skin and finally found themselves.. to think you had anything to do with that discovery is not only making yourself out to be a little bit more important in that person’s life than you really are… it’s giving yourself way more credit for the person’s frame of mind than you can actually take… remember… it’s not a character flaw or something that just happens one day out of the blue… it’s who they are.

It would have happened with or without you.

It is very likely she was having a hard time dealing with her sexuality. A lot of people, men and women, don’t want to accept the fact they like the same sex, so they try being straight.

Eventually their true selves come out, not because of anyone else, but because that is who they have been all along.

At least you found out after only 3 years. What if you had been in a very long term relationship? Like 10–15-20 years. Now that would suck. Be glad it happened early & move on.

OMG, I just recently had the same thing happen to me. I know this sucks but please know it has nothing to do with you. She may have been using you as some sort of attempt to be straight and realized that it doesn’t work that way. It’s not a choice, people are either gay or they’re not. Perhaps if society were as accepting of homosexuality as it is of hetrosexuality a lot fewer hearts would be broken in this way. Hang in there. The right straight girl will come along and you’ll see that you can be a good partner.

mate, seriously, we all feel a little insecure after splitting with someone but don’t let it bother you, if she likes woman this week, she might be back on to men next week. Maybe she really is into women and because she has known that all along she hasnt given her full effort into your relationship.

Its likely she has felt this way some time, dont beat yourself up about it..

The problem is that your not going to get anywhere fast feeling sorry for yourself, you need to put it behind you before you will have any luck in finding a new lesbian..i mean partner.. oh you know what i mean ;o)

Move on…
Be true to your feelings and before you know it things will change for the better.
Dump the baggage and make a fresh start.
Good luck…

Why in the world would you think that your penis caused someone’s brain to change?

This is one case where two non-related events are being seen as you as being related. Let me make it very clear: her breaking up with you and her identifying as a lesbian are NOT related! You did not “dick her” into being gay. She may have simply realized after being with you for so long that a relationship with a man was not what she truly wanted. This is her choice, not caused by you in any way.

@mij Excellent advice…. hope this young man is wise enuff to follow it.

I can’t begin to tell you how many women I’ve been involved with who later went on to become full time lesbians. It’s at least four that I know of. I used to joke that I was the cause of this, but really, I don’t feel any responsibility. I think I like strong women, and lesbians or future lesbians often have that kind of personality.

Personally, I think it reflects well on you. It probably means that you have a deeper understanding of your emotions, and can express them more fluently than the average male. It’s a good thing that you can manage to get a lesbian to be involved with you for three whole years! Don’t worry, man. You’ll have no problem finding another woman to be with you.

Kiev, listen to all the advise given here. It’s good & true. This isn’t about you. It’s about her. There’s nothing you could have done to change her preferences. She is what she is. Just take some time to regroup. You’ll be fine.

@dynamicduo Lurve for “You did not “dick her” into being gay.” made me laugh at work. Most embarrasing!

Its not your fault, It was her desision to start liking other girls. Don’t blame it on yourself….just move on. ^_^

ya dude. you turned her. way to go champ