Was there a teacher in your school that all the kids made fun of?
I had three absolutely pitiful teachers that all the middle school kids made fun of.
The one that sticks out the most is my 7th grade art teacher, Miss Pancake. Oh, I kid you not- Miss (as in unwed) Pancake (as in the delectable breakfast carbohydrate). As if her name wasn’t bad enough, the poor woman was wall eyed so when she yelled at someone, she pointed at one kid but said another kid’s name. She also had a real raspy voice like she always had laryngitis, so she couldn’t ever effectively scold her taunters. Poor lady. One day she came in and asked if we knew which of our fellow students spray painted her dog. I never found out who, but I bet it was this kid named Ben. Poor dog.
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There was the one with the goiter-like tumor, the one that wore polyester AND socks with sandals, the one who spit when he spoke….
Yep!
Come to think of it…
Was there one we didn’t make fun of?
In Junior High. Mr. Mark (his first name was Mark).
He was the gym teacher but policy dictated he teach something else. So they gave him Allgebra. Problem being, he was dumb as a post. He basically tried to stay one chapter ahead of us. It ended poorly.
PS: Much lurve for “delectible breakfast carbohydrate”.
In elementary school one of the teachers was extremely overweight…as in 300–400 lbs. We were so young none of us had ever seen someone that big, and everyone made fun of her. One of the favorite rumors was that she got stuck in a bathroom stall once, which I’m sure wasn’t true.
In high school pretty much everyone made fun of one of the English teachers because her husband was about 40 years older than her and she had a really monotone voice. I felt bad for her though, she always seemed really unhappy. She was really nice to me (because I actually took her class seriously) so I never made fun of her. But I also didn’t say anything when others did, which I guess is just as bad.
7th grade, Mrs. Harris. I felt so bad for her. She did wear the polyester pants, her hair was always all over the place and her glasses were broken. She was smart and had a very dry sense of humor – one that we didn’t get. We wanted instant funny…not the “thinking” person’s funny.
She asked to sign our yearbooks and to this day, I don’t think anyone has ever written anything as kind as she did. Luckily, I was a scared new kid, I hadn’t fallen into anything where I picked on anyone. I was the newbie…I was lucky I wasn’t picked on.
We had a old history teacher who would sort of foam at the mouth when he talked and it got really bad if he started yelling at a kid in class. He had no way of controlling us at all. Even punishments were made fun of and ineffective.
I was just glad that i didn’t sit in the front row and have to look up at that and wonder where it went when it disappeared from the corners of his mouth.
Ok, now I don’t want dinner anymore just thinking about that
@fireside : Oh, gross. I know exactly what you mean.
@cak: good for you for being a good girl! Middle schoolers are demon children and it takes a lot not to fall into a crowd.
Besides kids making fun of teachers with weird accents, and other like “problems” being in middle school, I’ll just point out a few things we get our asses fired up about.
As for fat teachers, we do stuff like @Ashpea9288, come up with untrue jokes, but just laugh it all out, and becomes like the inside joke of the grade.
When there are extremely strict teachers, we make fun of them when they yell at us, and kinda imitate them.
The point I am trying to get over terribly (lol) is that, we don’t really make fun of the teachers, we just put teachers that have something “ironic” or “unlikable” (you know what i mean :P ;)), and put them into funny situations.
Another one popped into my head, “bitchy” teachers. And yes I meant that, teachers that are “arrogant” and stuff, we just joke around about it, but never really, “made fun of them”
Mr. and Mrs. Cleaver.. married. Mr. was the computer teacher and Mrs. was 7th grade math. Mr. and Mrs. both spit like mad. I mean, I had Mrs. Cleaver for math and homeroom and once she spit on my notebook while explaining something and it was just under the size of a dime and YELLOW. She had this funky hand that sort of looked like Bill Clinton’s famous fist only with the palm facing up and all the time, not just when she was talking. She had giant Coke-bottle lens glasses and googly eyes behind them. Mr. Cleaver wore “flood” pants, terribly short ties, and the worst hairpiece I’ve ever seen.
Mr. Gottlieb was 7th grade science and he was the guy with the sweater vest, tie, and Nike running shoes from, like, 1974. If it wasn’t that it was the silky-striped short-sleeved button down. Always polyester pants. He was a total fool, he really was. The last day of school we laid a clean maxi pad sticky side up on his chair. He had it stuck to his ass for 2 class periods before he finally left the classroom and a teacher told him.
Another one was my freshman Earth Science teacher, Mr. Crespo. We called him Big Daddy C. He weighed, at best guess, about 500lbs and he used to sit up on the counter (you know the high counters that are in lab classrooms? He had one at the front too) and he would take an empty desk in the front, and pull it up over him like a blanket and give lecture. It was the weirdest thing. But I was lucky enough to get him his last year before retirement, and he gave the entire class an A on the final :D
We had a chemistry teacher at high school who was quite nice actually. He was friendly and loved children, but many took that as a sign of weakness and called him “the Sleeper”. We’d always cheat during tests or copy each other’s homework and he wouldn’t notice (or pretend he didn’t). And, despite all that, he’d give us good marks at the end of term.
We had a maths teacher who must have jumped out of a cartoon. He pretended we didn’t exist, had a lesson like a blind robot regardless of what was going on in class, didn’t notice if we had a new kid in or if half of us were missing, lost track of time, space, and coherent thoughts. He wasn’t exactly absent-minded. More like some B-movie version of an alien in disguise.
@poofandmook : Using a desk as a blanket cracked me up. That’s freaking comedy gold.
A helper art teacher who couldn’t can’t get a job. She was is horrible. She is overweight, evil, doesn’t shave her armpits, and when ever she talks she screeches. Also, she seems to think she’s the actual teacher and hands out detention slips left and right.
My seventh grade science teacher – a true nerd with a crew cut, coke bottle glasses, and a pocket protector. He lasted about 7 months and then decided teaching was not for him. He meant well but he really wasn’t a people person.
My 10th grade geometry teacher. She was small, elderly, dyed her hair an improbable dark brown, had hunched shoulders, and loved to wear cowl-neck sweaters. She looked like a turtle, and moved and taught as slowly as a turtle would if it were to teach geometry. She also sniffed constantly.
My 7th grade English teacher. She was one of the very few women in the school that wore a girdle. It made her walk as if she needed to pee, and gave her a uni-butt. She made us read Shakespeare out loud to each other.
My 8th grade Spanish teacher. She yelled at everyone impartially. According to her none of us would ever amount to a “hill of beans.” Her name was Miss Adams but everyone insisted it was short for Adamkowitz, which of course became “A Damn Old Witch.”
My 11th grade English teacher, Mrs. Goodhand, spent most of her time looking at us over her reading glasses. For some reason we found that reprehensible. But then, she forced us to read Faulkner.
Oddly enough we had a Mrs. Harris also, who was well-known for not having a nose (I kid you not – no one knew what had happened to it, but it looked as if it had been chewed off). However, she was a nice person and a great teacher so everyone really liked her.
Darwin’s “Adamkowitz” story reminded me…in middle school, the choir teacher was the biggest bitch you could ever imagine. Her last name was Mitchky, and yes, we called her Ms. Bitchky behind her back.
When I was in junior high school my dad was that teacher. He was mostly hated because he was one of the tougher teachers in the school and didn’t put up with crap from his students. We would be walking down the hall together and he’d shout at some kid and I’d stop dead in my tracks. The old guy would be ten feet in front of me and still talking before he realized I had stopped. I remember walking by the bathrooms and seeing him dragging two kids out by the collar, I turned and walked the other way. Those were the longest two years of my life.
In elementary school, our principal’s name was “Underwood,” which, for our child brains, was pretty fucking close to “underwear.” In middle school, Ms. Blazevitch became Ms. Blazebitch, Mr. Pinkerton became Mr. Prickerton, and Ms. (Susan) Anthony became Susan B(itch) Anthony. There was also a teacher named Crystal Snow White. We didn’t even have to change that one. In high school, we mostly made fun of Mr. Yonker (Yonk my Yonker!), Mr. Kamper (who was just old and practically senile), and our head of school, Ms. Morgan, whose first name was Louise. She got the nicknames Wheezy, LoMo, and Hitler.
sr. francesca. she was rotund and never smiled. she’d roll her tongue in the front of her mouth like trying to clear peanut butter. when you were bad, she’d push herself down a tight row of desks like a plow. she’d grab your ear and twist it while saying “what’s so funny, mr. man? you think it’s so funny?”
I had a goofy history teacher in high school who had thin, straight hair. Midway through the school year, his wife would give him this horrible poodle perm. He also had a tendency to sneeze violently while sitting at his desk and slam his head on the edge of the desk.
That’s nothing compared to what the teachers say about the students and we don’t have to make things up
One of our 4th grade teachers, always had this really creepy phrase she said, and when she said it she widened her eyes, it was : LOOK INTO MY GLASSY EYES! [ yes she wore glasses 8) ] It was the strangest thing in the world, I cant describe it more than that because it was in 4th grade. But believe me, she was something else.
@galileogirl: Yet another reason I would not want you teaching my child.
When I was in school in England, we had a couple of Masters who were made fun of. One was a French Master who always had food stains on his shirt, and he used a tie for a belt. The other was the maths Master, whose initials were F. A. G. and who smoked incessantly. You could always smell it on his clothes. He was, of course, called fag behind his back. In England, a fag is a cigarette, not a homosexual. Still, for Americans, the triple pun was quite delicious.
Mr R who taught our 7th grade wore the following every week on a rota:
Monday – Grey short-sleeve shirt, black tie, black trousers, black socks and dress shoes or penny loafers, black windbreaker (weather permitting)
Tuesday – Light blue shirt, navy blue tie, navy blue trousers, navy blue socks and oxfords, navy blue windbreaker
Wednesday – Pale olive green shirt, dark olive green tie, dark olive green trousers, dark olive green socks and oxfords, olive green windbreaker
Thursday – Pink shirt, burgundy tie, burgundy trousers, burgundy socks and oxblood penny loafers, burgundy windbreaker
Friday – Khaki-coloured shirt, brown tie, brown trousers, brown socks and brown dress shoes, brown windbreaker.
His clothes were absolutely top-drawer for what they were. The creases in his trousers were so sharp they could cut someone without them noticing for a few moments. Not a hair out of place. He was so incredibly anal. His pencils and other desk effects in the same spot every day. The erasers had to be returned to their same perch after each use. We’d turn a pencil so the tip was 10° counterclockwise (or 350° clockwise), just to watch his “I’m not going to freak out in front of the kids” OCD freakout. We would speculate sometimes over lunch that he probably still lived with his mom and that one could probably eat off the bathroom floor.
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Then there was Mr N, who “taught” American History in high school. He showed movies every class so that he could drink from the bottle we knew he kept in the bottom drawer of his desk. We made fun of him for being such an unoriginal sad old teacher drunk. He tried to hug me once and nicknamed me “Buttercup” in front of the whole class early in the term. It was awful to have the old drunk teacher sweet on you. Bleah.
Every single one of them.
Ooh Tits, right back atcha
Mr. Joe we called him sloppy joe. Poor man dressed a mess right down to his messy toupe. I mean if you wear a rug at least comb the thing.
@TitsMcGhee You are the best judge of that, since I don’t know you.
It sort of bothers me that you’d talk about kids. They’re KIDS. They don’t know which end is up, nevermind right from wrong.
Absolutely. He was a sub and completely deserved it. We weren’t awful to him until he started being awful to us. Our teacher told us what work she left for us—it was fun group work. He decided he didn’t want to deal with that or something and gave us busywork packets he’d brought himself. Then he wouldn’t let one girl go to the bathroom. The kids in my class were so awful to him over the course of the semester that he transferred to another district.
Mr Kroninberg looked like a penguin and the rumor was that he liked to drop pencils and look up girls dresses.
@Judi: I swear there was a perv like that in every school! Gross!
@ubersiren;
In retrospest, it was probably an urban legend.
@Judi : You’re probably right. Like how every school has a hot dog girl. You know what I mean.
@Judi OMG! How could I forget my 8th grad “shop” teacher???
Okay, everyone had to take shop and home ec at our middle school…the shop teacher looked down our shirts and would grunt to himself…like a PIG. No exaggeration, one day he had a HUGE boner for half of the class and a wet spot. My BFF at the time pointed it out to me. We watched how he strategically stood behind tables and placed his metal clipboard in front of “it” for the rest of the class….YUCK!!!!!!
My daughter’s middle school Career Investigation teacher was a bra strap snapper. He apparently has done a bit more than that in the past because he was arrested at the school during her class one time, and several parents are suing him. He also used to be the assistant girls soccer coach at the high school but they didn’t put up with his quirks.
He never messed with her because she told him if he touched her she would tell her mom, who would come and punch his lights out. Apparently he believed her and would never look me in the eye.
@Darwin : Good for you!
Career Investigation teacher??? Goodness, I think adults could use one of those.
@ubersiren: It is a required course in our school district and while it has its points, it is mostly aimed at folks who come from poor and poorly educated families. A lot of the class was about learning how to fill out a job application at the local corner mart, how to start a bank account, and how a toilet works (in case it doesn’t).
My daughter wants to be a plastic surgeon and so felt a bit out of place with the units on plumbing and basic electronics, but did well on producing charts on estimated future earnings.
My son enjoyed his Career Investigation class, however. I just wish they had spent more time on small engine repair because he has taken apart every small engine we own and left the bits out in the rain.
Yeah, Mr. Gonzo. It’s kinda sad actually; there’s a whole facebook group sarcastically saying he enriched people’s lives.
We also had an absolute nutjob named Ms. Most who would walk around with a cart (she didn’t have her own classroom) and clear backpack and generally terrorize her 7th grade math students. In 8th grade, we had Ms. Peirson, who was just very confused and oblivious. Kids would hide her dry erase markers in the vents, unplug her computer (she wasn’t very tech savvy), and leave class to go to the next door reading room to call her on the internal school phone line. She’d become flustered, but it was all in good fun. She earned everyone’s respect by dressing up like a thug (mind you, this is a 60–65 year old, thin, frail, white woman) for our spirit week. Lol4rl.
Yup – the female red headed teacher who had a huge red mustache (5th grade)
Mr. Fragapane = we called him Mr.fagapane (8th grade)
Bus driver bob = Mr.Baldy ( elementary school)
The counselor who’s nose looked like a “Dr.suess WHO character”
The science teacher from 7th grade with the Huge Booty
Huge butt = Mrs. Slap that
I have a LOT of teachers through my school life that EVERYONE talked about.
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