Moral Dilemma-please help?

Friends don’t steal from you

And what specifically is your question?

what do i DO?

did they give you any money for the book? you just cant not pay for a book, then sell it for a profit?

ask for the money, its yours, they were unfair to you.

You were loaning your friend the book. You did not authorize his reselling it. For the sake of the friendship I would take the $70 and let it go.

I probably would not loan the guy any more books.

You should tell your friend that next time he decides to sell your property without asking, you will murder him.

Or, maybe just tell him that that was a stupid move on his part, and you didn’t really appreciate it.

It’s a weird situation. He didn’t have a right to sell something that didn’t belong to him. He should of asked you first. Did he think that you gave him the book or did he know he was just borrowing it?

He knew he was only borrowing it, and thought he was doing me a favor by selling it back to the school.

Did he offer you the money or pocket it?

How well do you know this guy? All of my friends were highly aware that our school textbook sell-back program was a huge scam. Most of them are. My suspicion would be that he figured you would forget about the book. However, that is neither here nor there.

He should give you the money, you should do what you like with it, and tell your other friend the book was promised to what was happened and convey your apologies. There isn’t much else you can do.

@elijasuicide
I guess I’m not being clear:
My friend sold the borrowed book-to the school-thinking he was doing me a favor:
example conversation
Hey man I sold your math book for you!
Um, why?
You’re now $70 richer
Um, i hope you’re joking-I already promised that book to someone else as part of a trade or I was going to sell it online
Really? Oh man I’m so sorry that was stupid of me
Um, yeah it was-I couldve got 100 for it online
Oh man im so sorry-what can I do?

@patg7590 Let it go.

In that case, yep. Take the $70 and let it go.

So obviously it was a good intentioned but not well thought out plan. Tell him you don’t want the money, but you do what another copy of the book. How much he pays for it is his problem. Then again you could just let it go and tell your other friend the situation.

Guy’s a moron not malicious.
Let it go.

If you’ve known him a while, this can’t be your first clue that he has poor judgement.

Either way, he’s your friend, he thought he was helping, he offered to make amends. Let it go.

I agree with everyone that says that it was an idiotic mistake, but not an act of ill-will. I’d take the $70 and move on (for the sake of not fighting more than anything).

Your friend doesn’t have the right to sell your possessions!

But this is not malicious. This was just a stupid thing for him to do.

The most important thing now is that your fiance (or financee) gets a copy of the book. It is your friend’s job to do this, as it was your friend’s action that caused this situation to appear. You should not have to shell out more money when it was him who caused the problem. Then again, it gets tricky dealing with financials and friends, which is why I always keep the two as far separated as I can.

As I see it, there are two possible solutions here:
1. Your friend gets a copy of the book and gives it back to you. He will have spent the $70, and more from his own pocket likely, but this is the price of the lesson he’s learned now.
2. You take the $70 and try to find a copy of the book for your partner. This may mean you end up paying more money, but there is no pressure friend-wise.

I am of the opinion that Solution 1 is the most appropriate in this case.

@dynamicduo the class is over for both of them-today was the last day-hence he sold the book

My fiance doesn’t need the book any longer- I was just going to use the book either to sell online or to trade for another book I need.

@patg7590 LET it GO!

@SpatzieLover I did! I was just clarifying GOSH
If I lurve you will you stop yelling?

Take the cash, and move on. I’d be a bit irritated if a friend sold a piece of my property though. Who does that anyways?

@patg7590 I’ll stop yelling ;) but I don’t think you let it go. If your fiance no longer needs it, why would you ask us what you should do?

@RandomMrdan: Apparently, this guy.

@SpatzieLover – because the decrepit human part of me wants to make him pay the difference but I know that’s not what I really should do so I told him Fluther was to decide his fate.
and it did.

I had a BFF once “help” me out during a baseball card show (we were teens). She sold a $25.00 item for a quarter when I went to the bathroom. HA! Luckily, it was to a kid, and the mom questioned him as to HOW he paid for it. She brought it right back…It’s a good laugh. My friend has always been a bit dense. I forgive her. She’s sweet, and most of all means well.

@patg7590 Now, I hope you can both laugh about it?! ;)

@SpatzieLover
Yes-I linked him to this very discussion and now we have something to look forward to looking back on when we’re old and rotting on a front porch somewhere in Florida.

@patg7590: Well then in that case…be sure to tell him I meant “moron” in the nicest possible way. ;^)

<waving> Hi, patg7590’s friend!

Then in that case, I would take the $70 and be done with it.

It’s not worth losing anything (thoughts, time, a friend) over the price difference between what you did make and what you could have made.

Ask him not to do something like that again and take the $70. Besides, if you sold it online you would have to pay a percent to the listing site plus shipping, so maybe you came out close to what you would have made otherwise.

But in future make sure he knows to ask you before disposing of your possessions.

Take the money,

This ordeal cost you $70, or it cost you $70 and a friend. Only you can decide that.

If you keep the friend, neither of you need mention it again, but do remember this for the next time anyone ask for a similar favor.

okay I’m sorry but that’s just WRONG!

How can he/she sell the book without asking beforehand?

Is there a receipt showing that he/she really only got 70 bucks for it? I’m sorry, I’m all tolerant and what not, but selling my stuff? Heck no.

Get my book back, I promised it to someone, I don’t care, I want my book.

I’d bet my butt there ain’t no receipt and the guy had a friend needing the book for cheaps.

Cheesh…

Look, I think we’ve all established your friend did something wrong. Even he admits that. But now it’s done, and unless you can go to the school and get it back for $70, it’s over.

You can either shout at your friend (or force him to pay you the extra $30 that you could have made) at the risk of losing him, or just take the $70 and just forget about it. And I mean really forget. He didn’t steal your book, he just tried to do something nice for you and it ended up being a mistake. No big deal.

Once upon a time, many years ago, there was a young boy who had put his brand new guitar to lean against the wall. A classmate came over to visit and accidentally knocked it down while I was talking to him. I didn’t even pay any attention. I just picked up the guitar, put it in its case and kept talking. 20 years later, he is my best friend. He’s stood by me through thick and thin all these years. I was the best man at his wedding and he was my manager when I started my career. And I helped him open his company.

That guitar is somewhere under the staircase now. But my friend and I had lunch together today. And it was good :)

@Jack79

I admire your pragmatism

Maybe I’m too paranoid or something

Your friend needs to replace the book, at whatever it costs him. You want the book, not the cash. He had an error in judgement, and needs to put the situation back the way it was. It’s up to him to figure out how to do it, and if it costs him money above and beyond the $70, that’s his price of doing something he shouldn’t.

As far as ‘measly’,college bookstores used to pay abt 50% for used books and then mark it up for resale. It is a business after all. It is your $70 because it was your book. If you can’t get past what he did just let him go. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not worth the stress to hold on to negative emotions. But feel free to share with mutual friends if he burns you on the money,

Take the money, keep the friend.