General Question

lukiarobecheck's avatar

What does everyone think of sexting?

Asked by lukiarobecheck (1526points) March 25th, 2009

More in depth, what does everyone think about the underage kids who are being charged with child pornography for sexting?

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54 Answers

chelseababyy's avatar

What’s sexting first of all. And anything with underage kids and the word “sex” is just weird, creepy, and wrong.

A_Beaverhausen's avatar

@chelseababyy sending nudie pics, or sexually explicit texts.

i guess its a good way to retain virginity. maybe a new abstinence technique?

bobbyb_'s avatar

It’s apparently ruined tons of teenage girls school-careers, which sorta sucks. Some of these girls just don’t think, I guess.

chelseababyy's avatar

Okay. No, don’t even want to think about that. My sister is 12 and is wearing stuff I was never allowed to wear until like, highschool, and THAT is scary. Thinking about kids ‘sexting’ is just completely wrong. Where have the childhoods gone? Personally, I think that they’re growing up too fast. Also I think that they feel like they have to do this, to maybe feel cool, or maybe is what all their friends are doing, peer pressure can definitely be a bitch. Especially when you have a crush.

bobbyb_'s avatar

@chelseababyy Exactly, it feels almost like these young girls are pressured more and more to put out, but their CHILDREN. A thirteen year old shouldn’t feel she has to show her body off to impress some other CHILD, ya know? It’s sad.

lukiarobecheck's avatar

Before everyone starts to think I am some perv. Let me send a link to an article that I was reading that made me think of this question. I realized that I should have added this before, based on some of your answers.

http://blog.wired.com/27bstroke6/2009/03/aclu-sues-da-ov.html

chelseababyy's avatar

@bobbyb_ Definitely. I see that in my sister a lot. My parents moved, and ever since that she’s wanted to be “popular” and have nicer clothes because they moved to a more high income area. She wears eyeliner AT TWELVE, teeny little tanktops and shorts. ha, if I ever tried that when I was her age my mom would have FREAKED OUT. And you’re right, it’s weird. CHILDREN trying to impress other CHILDREN. Something about that just isn’t right. It’s bad when those kids feel like they have to do it to be accepted.

jamzzy's avatar

its all an age thing. I have heard of grown adults doing things like that and it would be perfectly fine, but the difference is they were married and not 12. Sexting can be done a right way and a wrong way….when i was dating my girlfriend we had a very big sex life so the whole sexting thing was there and on a weekly basis almost….i loved it…its my girlfriend naked in the middle of my work day…..... im 17 of course im gonna love it….but thats thinking with my penis… If i looked at it from being a brother… the thought of my little sister doing such a thing makes me want to become a feminist. I guess it’s like porn, some people look down upon it but some people love it…doesn’t make it wrong or right…

SpatzieLover's avatar

Personally, I won’t allow my child his own phone at the ages most kids get them. He’ll have to be able to pay for the thing on his own. I’d hope the morals we’re teaching him will help for “sexting” to not become part of his lifestyle, also.

That said, do I think the teens are awfully young and understanding the consequences of their actions.

shilolo's avatar

In my opinion, this is just the growing trend towards adulthood being forced on children at younger and younger ages. Having done a lot of clothes shopping recently for my 2 year old son, I am appalled at what is sold for young girls. There are young girls’ outfits that seem like they just came out of a Victoria’s Secret catalog. Now that I also have a daughter, I’m freaked out.

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

Dealing with the prosecuting minors for posting/receiving nude photos as adults for violating child pornography laws is stupid and illegal/unconstitutional.

A distinction has already been made, they are not adults, which is why it’s considered child pornography. But as they themselves are children, the law makes no sense as it applies to different class of people.

Lupin's avatar

@jamzzy Warning! Warning! Danger! Will Robinson!
In NY it is illegal to have on your cell phone. Even if she sent them to you willingly and you did not take the pictures. You are in possession, she is below the age of consent, and you are opening yourself up to charges. They screwed a 17 year old boy for sending pictures to his 15 year old friend- along the lines of corrupting a minor. These are sex offenses and get you put on the SO list for a long time. Watch it! Better yet, tell the girl’s parents if you get one.

Dog's avatar

I have four girls and echo what @shilolo is saying regarding pushing adulthood on kids earlier and earlier. It is hard to find clothing that does not look like teen clothes for my 7 year olds.

VzzBzz's avatar

This ups the ante for kids to sophisticate their social behaviors. You don’t want your ass, tits or Tinker spread to everyone else in school? Then don’t hit “send” in the first place. Kids have sex in elementary schools, I’ve met very very few innocent kids much older than that.

jamzzy's avatar

did i say 17…i meant 18. silly me =D

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

As for sexting itself, like it or not pubescents are sexual creatures, meaning they have sex and engage in sexual behaviour, it’s hard coded into their DNA so people had better get use to it. Laws of nature> antiquated traditions/cultural norms>dictates of various religions.

What is disturbing about sexting is this
http://www.salon.com/mwt/broadsheet/feature/2009/03/07/sexting_suicide/index.html

A girl died because of other people’s antiquated social norms, slut-shamming. That’s what is disgusting, not teens exchanging nude photos.

Lupin's avatar

Even worse! You bumped it up a Class D Felony See NYS Article 235 – Obscenity and Related Offenses. Tell her parents! When, not if, it hits the light of day, you will want to be sitting in court on the side of the prosecution, not the defense.

Lupin's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria You may think those laws are “stupid and illegal/unconstitutional” but they are still the laws. Lives have been ruined by this stupidity. Guys, Tell the parents! CYA!

alossforwords's avatar

Dear fellow parents- be parents and control your children.
Dear kids- leave sex to the professionals until you are no longer controlled solely by your hormones.
Morons- stop reproducing.
That is all.

A_Beaverhausen's avatar

and as of the negative effects, i received a picture of a girl i knew from high school. naked. she send it to her boyfriend. it broke my heart, her picture was being send to everyone! she was 17.

ark_a_dong's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria As a teenager, I agree wholeheartedly with what you said, but the article you linked says that the girl didn’t commit suicide because of sexting.

immediately before killing herself, Jesse had attended the funeral of a friend who had committed suicide. There is a name for this sort of phenomenon: suicide contagion.”

asmonet's avatar

I think sexting is just…ridiculous. It’s a shame teenage brains don’t function like they should 90% of the time.

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

@alossforwords

OR You traditionalists can get OUT of teen’s sex lives, you have no business there.

IF a given teen chooses of his/her own free will to adhere to your ridiculous 1950eque values fine, if not that’s even better.

asmonet's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria: Do you honestly think teenagers, as a group are wise enough to be having sex and to deal with the consequences that may follow?

alossforwords's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria :
I’m only 28 so I don’t have a teen for at least a while, but when my son is that age, he will live by my rules. A parent is supposed to guide a child and keep them safe until they can make good decisions and exist independently. If I pay his phone bill, he will not use his phone to break the law and hurt young women with his carelessness. You “Progressive” thinkers can hand your daughters a box of condums and tell them to try to avoid getting pregnant or overwhelmed by diseases before they get a chance to know what life can offer them. If it is traditional to think parents should raise their kids, I’ll take the compliment. I’m tired of paying taxes to support unwed mothers with no eductation because they couldn’t keep their pants on.

alossforwords's avatar

I do agree that adults do not belong in teen sex lives though. I don’t think teens should have a sex life in the first place. If we wanted to live like animals and according to our impulses, why bother with rules and laws at all?

casheroo's avatar

I remember what I was like as a teenager. Not good. Sexting is yet another thing that children shouldn’t be doing.
When my son is old enough, he’ll have a phone for emergencies..well let him have a limited amount of texts, if he abuses that priviledge, then they’re gone.
And @shilolo uh yeah, I’m sooo glad I have a boy. It blows my mind some of the clothes I see for toddler girls!

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

@asmonet Do you honestly think teenagers, as a group are wise enough to be having sex and to deal with the consequences that may follow?

What “Consequences”? Teenage sexuality is like driving, only the “accidents” are deemed news worth, nobody ever mentions the 100s of millions of safe outings.

Made even worse by the fact that most of those accidents are totally preventable, correctable should the need arise. at only a small fraction of what we as a society currently pay today to care for those “consequences” once they are born.

And it’s demeaning to refer to everyone’s children as “consequences”. I was a planned pregnancy, a choice, not an accident.

As for STIs, they are just another group of communicable diseases, like mumps, measles others are like bronchial infections. Do we keep children from coming into contact with others to avoid those things? NO. Force them to walk around in environmental suits? Nope.

It’s the same thing. Get them immunized, test children in school, if a child is infected, treat them most STIs are curable, eliminate the carriers, you have eradicated those diseases in the general population- simple, proven public health practices.

The “consequences” are the result of societal stupidity. Teen are the victims, not the cause.

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

@alossforwords I’m tired of paying taxes to support unwed mothers
Many of you traditionalists oppose abortion on demand so it’s only fitting you have to pay for the child’s care.

Unfortunately, so do I

nayeight's avatar

So as a 22 year old who was a teen not too long ago and did partake in “sexting” as you like to call it, I really don’t think it’s that serious. Now there are some girls out there who are just stupid and maybe too young who don’t have any business “sexting” but if their stupid parents don’t stop them, then that’s their problem. It’s the parents fault anyway for not explaining these things to their kids and an early age and settiing REASONABLE limits. Don’t let your kids run around like wild banshees but don’t keep them in a cage like dogs either.

nayeight's avatar

I was probably 16–18 when I sexted and by the time college came around I was over it. I never sent any pictures that I thought were too dirty and I didn’t send pictures to people who I didn’t trust. Nothing bad happened to me, I’m pretty normal. I don’t have any kids or stds or self-image issues. I saw it merely as a way to flirt or express my sexuality with someone I liked without having to actually have sex. Teens get horny….and that will never change.

shilolo's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria You said about STDs “Get them immunized, test children in school, if a child is infected, treat them most STIs are curable, eliminate the carriers, you have eradicated those diseases in the general population- simple, proven public health practices.”

Let me now throw a wet blanket on your thesis – sexually transmitted diseases are not trivial, particularly for women. Here’s a short, but I think, educational list:
1. Gonorrhea: Penile drip in men (hard to miss). Can be asymptomatic in women (and can lead to pelvic inflammatory disease and infertility).
2. Chlamydia: Mostly asymptomatic, and also a leading cause of pelvic inflammatory disease and infertility.
3. Genital herpes: Not awful, per se, but carries a stigma, and can lead to birth defects in children if passed via the vagina to the fetus during birth. Also is associated on occasion with herpes meningitis and encephalitis.
4. Genital warts: Mostly an eyesore, but the same viruses (HPV) can lead to cervical cancer (for which there is now a vaccine).
5. Syphilis: Rare in women, but gaining ground in men who have sex with men. Lots and lots of consequences for a syphilis infection (it is known as the “great mimicker”).
6. HIV: Not a trivial sexually transmitted disease. Perhaps not as common as gonorrhea and chlamydia, but still common enough that we see many new cases every year in the US.

Still liking your free-wheeling promiscuity now? You could always just deny these things “It won’t happen to me”, until, sadly, it does.

chelseababyy's avatar

I don’t think that teens are ready for what sex can get them into. They’re ready for sex, but not ready for what comes along with that. Aka, emotional, physical and mental attachment. Maybe, possibly having a child. Being used for sex, while you may actually have feelings for the person using you.

I was seventeen when I got pregnant and I was not ready. The guy I was with was a total tool, and got mad at me for getting pregnant, after that, I KNEW he wasn’t right for me. (And I got rid of the baby) When I got rid of my unborn child, the process was horrible, painful, and screwed me at that time mentally. I also learned that I should be with someone that loved me for me, whether or not an accident had happened. It brought a tremendous amount of stress to me, who was already stressed by school, home, and whatnot. To this day, what happened affects me. I have bad dreams, I cry randomly when I think about what happened. They don’t know how it all goes down, they don’t know how fast things can change being involved and having sex.

These children go to Sex Ed, but do they take anything from that? Is peer pressure just overriding everything they learn about sex? Do they feel the NEED to do these things, whether they want to be accepted, per say, or maybe they might just be insecure? Or do they act how I did and think “it could never happen to me.”

alossforwords's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria I was only quoting you. I am not a tradionalist. I believe that women should have the right to choose. I just think it’s sad that they do not make that choice before they go out and have sex. Having sex leads to having children. Playing with a gun can lead to shooting yourself. As long as you’re okay… no problem! In the case of abortion, it is necessary to correct the consequence of sex. How harsh is that? Something has to die because of a mistake. Women are psychologically altered from those experiences. Which… shouldn’t matter… but parents and taxpayers pay for that, not some child who, instead of working, was playing nurse with another child too immature to raise a child. Defend your freedom all you want. I remember what it was like to be young. I admire the spirit but have no respect for this debate. I think if you want to play adult, then there should be true adult consequences, like prison and jail time for child pornography for anyone underage that transmits sexual data. You won’t even remember thinking otherwise the day that you have a child.

Lupin's avatar

Well folks here it is in the news today.
14 year old girl faces porn charges for nude photos
“March 26, 2009 · A 14-year-old New Jersey girl has been accused of distributing child pornography after posting nearly 30 explicit nude pictures of herself on MySpace.com — charges that could force her to register as a sex offender if convicted.”

Let’s follow along and see what they do to her. There a lots of boys on the Sex Offender list already for this type of “crime”. I think it’s time for the girls to get in on it.

Guys. I’m telling you, if you get pictures from a girl younger than 17, tell the girl’s parents! Now! You do not want to be charged with possession.

I’m glad my kids are grown and gone!

nayeight's avatar

That is so stupid. I feel bad for that poor girl. Regardless of her actions being right or wrong, it doesn’t make sense to have a 14 year old girl a registered sex offender. WTF?

Lupin's avatar

Exactly. But there are a lot of boys in the same situation because girls sent them pictures. Most of the time it is the boys who are charged. Ridiculous.
If you are younger than 17 don’t do it. It will wreck your life for a single act of stupidity!
Makes you wonder about the sex offender list doesn’t it?

nayeight's avatar

What I think is really dumb is that the girl can be 14 year old minor, send a sexually explicit picture of herself and the police are threatening to register her as a sex offender. But if she were a 18 year old and sent a picture of the same context and there is no issue because she is an adult. Same thing with boys, regardless of sex or age a minor who sends or recieves a sexually explicit text should not have to face type of charge because they themselves are MINORS.

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

@shilolo

Your attempts throw a wet blanket on my thesis is is very sad, and proves something I have said many times. Education is not the solution to all the world’s ills. I assume you have an education similar to what I’ll have when I graduate – PhD in microbiology/virology/genetics, possibly along side an MD.

And yet you perpetuate the FUD factor associated with STIs in a feeble attempt to prop up antiquated ways of life based on ridiculous traditions and moral values that should of died out 40 years ago. No amount of education can eliminate political manoeuvring and self-imposed stupidity.

Sure STIs can do extensive damage if left untreated, so can more mundane diseases like chronic bronchitis, which can kill you, and it’s considerably more prevalent.

STIs are much easy diseases to eradicate than the childhood diseases of yesteryear as most of them are only transmitted via exchange of bodily fluids/sexual contact between people – treat the carriers and you have eradicated the disease from at least one population group…Need empirical proof? Check out the statistics on STI prevalence in wealth private schools vs. inner city public schools. STIs are non-existent in many of the former institutions, and it’s not like those children engage in less sexual activity than poor or middle class children, but they do have better health care.

Promoting abstinence over aggregative screening, treatment and sound public health polices is beneath someone who fancies himself a scientists, but I’m sure the traditional the stay at home mummies(spit) posting here will be more than happy to write glowing letters of recomendation to right wing “think”| tanks for ya.

shilolo's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria With that attitude, I’m sure you will do quite poorly as a doctor. My statistics (meaning, the Center for Disease Control’s) are backed up by years of personal medical experience. What is yours? Oh….

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

@shilolo

I take everything the comes out of the CDC with a grain of salt as it’s common knowledge their finding/studies/data have become politicized and thus suspect at best.

As for possessing personal medical experience so did Joseph Mangla. What does that prove other than doctors are not above questionable behavior.

shilolo's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria First of all, equating me and or public health officials with Joseph Mengele (not Mangla) is both juvenile and rude. As a doctor who cares about public health, I am saddened by your ignorance. As a regular person, I frankly could care less if you go have sex with the entire football team. Be my guest.

You obviously have little understanding of what screening is. The whole point of screening tests are to identify diseases early on. Screening doesn’t prevent you from actually getting the disease. For example, let’s imagine this hypothetical scenario. You are rich and affluent (as you pretend to be). You have a steady boyfriend who you have sex with all the time (following your “rules”). You just had a visit with your doctor, and got a clean bill of health. You go away one weekend, and he decides to go to a party. He’s having a great time, and meets a woman who is doing her best to seduce him. He’s never met her before, but hey, he’s following your “rules”. So, they go and do it. Of course, he never tells you, and you go back to your normal sex life. He feels fine, you feel fine. A year later, you go for your routine doctor’s visit. They run the standard GC-chlamydia panel and an HIV test (screening, of course). A week later, they call you in and say, “We’re sorry to have to tell you this, but your chlamydia test AND HIV test were positive.” How did this happen? Well, let’s not forgot that one-night stand he had a year ago… But, good news, the screening worked! We’ll treat your chlamydia, and monitor your HIV status until you need treatment for the rest of your life.

Think this is improbable. A month ago, I had to tell a 20 year old affluent woman in Marin County, CA that she had AIDS when she came in with Pneumocystis pneumonia.

Of course, this won’t happen to you….Never.

casheroo's avatar

Wow @Lupin I had no clue kids were being charged, after posting pictures of themselves…and boys were charged after they had pictures sent to them?! That sounds ridiculous. Things like that should go by a case by case basis.
I would hope that my children never do such a thing, I never knew how serious the consequences were. All I can do is inform my child of the consequences. That’s what I will do with sex education as well.

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

@shilolo
All I’m saying is that Mengele was neither the first nor last doctor to misapply and/or fudge medical/scientific principals to promote an agenda, many people have and still do. He is just among the most infamous.

Your bias is so blatantly obvious it’s palatable. You have nothing but contempt for promiscuous girls, just as I refer to traditional women as breeding sows and their offspring piglets. I just have enough maturity not to let my personal options cloud my scientific judgement or influence policy decisions. You cast dispersions on me I’ll toss them right back.

You have a steady boyfriend who you have sex with all the time (following your “rules”)

I don’t do monotony (monogamy) and trust my dates about as far as I can throw them…which is about 3 feet on a good day. sets strawgirl ablaze and proceeds to roast marshmallows

Think this is improbable
Of course. I’m not saying that one case is didn’t happen, butt I would not go so far as to call it probable, it just happened to be yours. I’ll even go one step further and say here is no reason to believe you will not get another cave very similar to it before the year is though. but that doesn’t change the chances of contracting HIV found below does it.

http://jama.ama-assn.org/content/vol301/issue1/images/medium/jwr80108fa.jpg

I’m going to give you the benefit off the doubt and assume you are normally smarter than this, it just so happens that your cultural bias has blinded you.

shilolo's avatar

Haha. “cloud my scientific judgement or influence policy decisions”. What experience do you have?

ratboy's avatar

If they are producing child pornography when they photograph themselves, are they committing child abuse when they masturbate?

asmonet's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria: I wasn’t only referring to the children as consequences. I was referring to the emotional, physical and mental toll of a sexual relationship on a developing child.

I do not see children as consequences (in a negative way) in and of themselves, but for the children who do have them, yes, it is a consequence of irresponsible behavior. Having sex without precautions, having sex when you have absolutely no way of raising a child that might come from it, having unnecessary abortions I see these results as consequences – at least by your definition of the word.

And if you’re going to throw a fit over the word ‘consequence’ might I suggest you look it up? You clearly aren’t aware of it’s basic meaning.

asmonet's avatar

“Your bias is so blatantly obvious it’s palatable.”

Shilolo isn’t ever really biased, and I doubt if he was it would be tasty. Perhaps, you were thinking of palpable?

Also, no need for things to be blatant and obvious. Do yourself a favor, stop trying to seem more intelligent than you are.

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

@shilolo What experience do you have?

Not much but at least I’ll grow up, you just grow old…Hahaha

And you comment on my maturity level, are you 12?

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

@asmonet Shilolo isn’t ever really biased

Oh look a groupie! I went though a groupie phase, till my evil parents/teachers insisted I focused on my own life…alas, it’s too late for you, awww so sad.

Tell ya what, should I ever be in need of a copy editor with them there traditional valllllluuuuues, I’ll look you up..now run along and bake some cookies or something.

shilolo's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria It must be nice to have the overconfidence of teenage hood. To pretend like you know more than someone with 20 years of research and medical experience must really do wonders to boost your self-esteem. Perhaps your self-esteem is so low because you sleep around? That does tend to be the case in most instances. Though, as I said above, I really don’t care how many people you sleep with. I’m not your father. I really, really, really don’t care.

I’m really neither prudish nor conservative. I’m an HIV-Infectious Diseases doctor in the most liberal city in America. Working in the free city STD clinic, I’ve heard sex stories that you wouldn’t believe, and, in truth, it doesn’t faze me a bit. What does bother me is your ignorance of serious medical issues. You want to end up with herpes, chlamydia and HPV? Be my guest. Serologic evidence in the US shows >20% of people are HSV-2 positive. Chlamydia is the most frequently reported STD in North America, and 10–40% of women who get chlamydia become infertile. Cervical cancer (and all the early stages of dysplasia) is a very bad, yet preventable cancer. Feel free to roll the dice with your health.

asmonet's avatar

@HarmonyAlexandria: I am no groupie, I respect Shi’s experience and knowledge and have seen and heard of how he has used it to benefit others. My values truly aren’t ‘traditional’ as I see you defining them. I’m far more moderate than that. But, I see a conversation with you goes nowhere, instead of responding to my comments you instead decided to act like a child and call names. So, good luck in life. I hope life doesn’t teach you the lessons you need to learn too harshly.

Zen's avatar

My son is almost 15 and has a cell phone because I want him to have one for safety. However, it’s an older model, without a camera or the capability for anything beyond text messages. Problem solved.

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