Have you got any tips on stopping me from procrastinating telling my mum I like boys?

theres no easy way. i sit down talk will be the best. no sense in hiding it from her.

do what you gotta do my friend. take your time, there’s no rush really… and besides, all else fails she’ll probably walk in on you eventually ;). (I kid)

You really think she’s going to have that big of a problem with it?

2 methods:

1 – Come home and bust through the front door sweating and breathing hard. Run up to her in a panic and yell, “get your things we’ve gotta get out of here, NOW!!!” When she asks why tell her you just killed a man but you can’t explain right now. Keep this going until she’s freaking out then stop and say, “I’m just kidding… I’m gay.”

2 – Just tell her. It’s your life so why live it in secret?

moms like having gay sons, she already knows anyway, i guarantee it. moms know EVERYTHING

@Sakata haha I vote option one… bring a little humor into the situation.

I am stuck with the same problem. i’m glad to have someone who is in the same predicament (not that that makes me happy). i’m still scared that she won’t accept me since her and my father are big christians. what do i do?
@ABoyNamedBoobs03 – i’m 17 and already moved out. i have already procrastinated enoguh

@A_Beaverhausen
Of course she knows so do most of my brothers and sisters, I just need to admit it and ask out that hot boy I’ve been wanting to ask out for months now. :P

Also I know for a fact she will accept me 100%

ha! SO DO IT ALREADY!

If you are not ready don’t do it. Most people begin to come out when they have accepted their sexuality themselves. Whether we like to admit it or not, we experience internalized homophobia. We are uncomfortable with ourselves and our place in the world, because we are singled out as different, and we experience many negative consequences due to one aspect of ourselves. You will know when you are ready. My only advice is don’t make a big deal out of it. Bring it up in an everyday conversation. And anyway, most parents already know. I can’t tell you how many LGBTs I know whose parents said “they always knew” when their child came out to them.

@tinyfaery oh. i have accepted my sexuality. but my mom just scares the S**T out of me. :)

@berocky1 Well, that is a different issue all together. Your question should have been “Why am I scared of my mother, and what can I do to get over it?”

Tell her she’ll always be the only woman in your life.

Why does she scare you?

There’s a good chance she suspects already. Just blurt it out and make sure she knows how much you love her and don’t want to upset her.

My mother is lovable, funny, manipulative, and rich. not that i don’t enjoy three of those adjectives. i don’t think that she would accept me. but maybe she would. and that scares me.

This is a very serious issue for you. Are you sure it is procrastinating or is it waiting until you are ready?

Before you tell her, think out the worst things that could possibly happen or that she could possibly say and prepare your responses to them.

Also, be clear about what you want from her and tell her. Do you want her acceptance of your homosexuality? Do you just want her to know so she knows who you really are?

She will be confused about what you expect her to do or say so let her know. Maybe it’s “You don’t have to say anything now, Mom, just take some time to think about it.

Is your Mom supporting you? If so, you have to be sure that if she were to react in an extreme way and toss you out that you have a plan and that you are OK with that before you tell her.

Good luck. I am hoping for your sake that her love for you will triumph over her fears.

@Myndecho and @berocky1 Hugs to both of you. If you have a hard time telling your parents face to face, a letter might do the trick. Express your love for them, and gratitude for all the ways they’ve supported you in the past. Tell them you hope they will continue to support you (I don’t mean financially) in the future. Still, take Marina’s advice to heart: Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. Good luck!

Edited to add: I know a very devout Catholic woman, whose gay son and his partner are treated with the same love and respect as her daughter and her husband. Is she thrilled that he is gay? No. She loves and respects him even so.

well @augustlan the thing is. i have a trust fund. which is NOT my source of income. i have a well paying job with matching funds from the trust fund. I do not need their financial support and half of that money goes to charity. But the sad part is. i don’t want their views to change of me.

@berocky1 I understand your fears, hon… but you shouldn’t have to hide who you are from your parents. As a mother, the thought that my children might someday feel that they’d have to hide such a fundamental part of themselves from me makes me terribly sad. You needn’t tell them right away, if you’re not ready to share it with them yet. Just don’t let it go too long, ok? If someone (even your parents) can’t love you for who you are, are you sure you want their love anyway?

@augustlan that was a great piece of wisdom. i just need to understand that they will always love me. and i know that even if i disappoint them they are still my parents. so i can accept them even if they can’t do the same for me.

What type of parenting style did they have when you were younger? Are you an only child?

I don’t have any great advice other than what others are already saying. JUST TELL HER! Say, “Mom, I’m a homosexual.” There you go. I think my parents were disturbed by how much I like girls! And the lengths I would go to sneaking them into the house when I lived there!

Do you want to be who you are, or do you want to be dependent and accountable to your parents. Feel her out. What does she say when homosexuality comes up on TV or how about during the
election? Unfortunately, many parents never accept their childrens’ sexuality. If you are still dependant on your parents, maybe it is not a good time. Only you can decide how you want to live your life. Do it. Homosexuality has become more acceptable the more that gays are visible. Most people know someone and love someone who is gay, and the more personalized the issue becomes the more others come to accept it. Do it for yourself and for the “family”. Good Luck. Let us know how it goes.

It might be easier to tell people if you do so at a time when they’ll have a lot of time to think before replying to you. For example, leave a letter right before you head off to a friend’s place for the weekend.

You can try leaving subtle hints around the house until someone asks you outright. Some people find it easier to come out when they are directly asked, rather than having to bring it up for themselves.