What is one of the weirdest beliefs you had as a child?

Whatever that process was in the movie “The Fly,” I claimed that with an owl in first grade, but what got my parents off the couch was when I tried to visit Mr. Rogers via a hammer.

I actually believed there was always money in the bank if I needed new shoes, now as a parent I know they weren’t lying.

Benjaman: I believed I will be the richest man in China. I’m not sure how…

James: I believed that cartoons were real just like people.

I was convinced that monsters/aliens/badguys could come out of the TV or movie screen after it had been shut off, but they could only come out of the one you watched them on. I also thought that even if the monsters/aliens/badguys came to get me in my bed, as long as every part of me was on the blankie that I had laid out under me, they couldn’t touch me.

A friend of mine was ten or eleven before her parents convinced her that french fries, hash browns and baked potatoes were all the same thing cooked in different ways.

I didn’t have too many, but my mother was convinced as a child that babies came from breasts, and they were just waiting to come out.

I spat out my drink all over when she told me that one.

@MacBean: I always thought the monsters and baddies couldn’t get me as long as I was completely tucked in, all the corners were rolled under me. I was always cocooned. :)

I thought (among the siblings) whoever is taller would be the elder brother/sister .!!!!

I tried to plant a knife tree. I also had a much different idea of what a “drug store” was. I imagined people in white biohazard suits sorting huge piles of cocaine and what not. I was very young

Well since your asking of one particular warped belief as a child, I’d have to recall believing that I had the ability of telepathy =\. I used to spend the longest of time’s on a daily basis believing anything from making my stationary move, door’s close/open to the transition of red/green light at traffic stop’s T_T =^.^=

@InEv3 I used to do that, too. ;) There was nothing better than proclaiming, “I think it moved! No, really! I think it moved!” after hours of trying. Hehehe. :)

@DrasticDreamer rofl awwwww I remember those moment’s =P. Okay I’d have to be honest and say I do sometime’s believe I can make the red light go green still and stay that way at traffic light’s but that’s because I’m on a rush to work ahem and hide’s >_<. Your image is your RL pic? You look pretty just need to smile! =^.^=

This going to sound batshitinsane…

My sister told me peanut butter was urine and testicles that are blended. I’m 31 and I don’t know what the stuff tastes like. I hear that it is good. Similar asshatery is the reason I don’t know what eggs taste like.

I’m not joking.

@InEv3 I still do it with traffic lights, too. Shh. :D If you right click my avatar and hit “view image”, then in the link delete the word “thumb”, it will make the picture bigger and you can see that I have a little smile on my face. Thank you for the compliment though. :)

@johnpowell Your sister was evil. You do not know the simple delights of peanut butter? Like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches? Or peanut butter and pickle sandwiches (that’s pretty much just me, but it’s AWESOME!)

@johnpowell Yeah, aren’t sisters great?~

@DrasticDreamer It’s not just you! I have three friends—one local, two in different internet circles—who keep trying to get me to try PB & pickle. They’re starting to break me. What kind of pickle do you recommend? They each prefer a different kind—one dill, one garlic and one sweet.

@MacBean Please try it! I’ve been trying to get people I know to try it for years, but no one will! Haha! :) I always eat mine with dill. I think sweet might be a little too overwhelming for my palette (the salt in dill is the perfect sweet/salty combo) and I can’t imagine, at all, what garlic would taste like. But I’ll have to try it, just to see.

I believed that in every “machine” there’s something alive, and if I only convinced it that I wouldn’t tell, it would finally reveal itself to me.

Ever talked to a coffee maker for 3 hours?

Yes, and I didn’t even have the excuse of thinking it was alive. :(

@MacBean

L O L!!!! Now that’s creepy

That when I die I’d go to this fantasy place called heaven. Understanding our mortality has made me to understand that it is even more important to treat each other as excellent as we can. Our lives are very precious and I feel that everyone needs to be treated with respect. Of course we have criminals that don’t think this way and hence they are paying the price. I could go on…

I had this half notion that California must be up in the air, which would explain why we had to take an airplane to visit relatives there.

I believed the oil burner in the basement was actually a hive of bees buzzing around.

@Lupin Wow, I bet that must have been the locus of many a nightmare. That is rather odd!

I thought all cats were girls and all dogs were boys.

While sitting in the passenger seat of a car, if I stick my hand out the window and grab a pole were are passing, the car will preform a 180 turn around the pole.

Useful for car chases. Thankfully I never experimented with this hypothesis.

@Haroot I bet your folks are glad you never did this as well.

I would hope so. Gladly they weren’t those, “Learn from experience” type of parents.

I thought when i watched shows in black and white that back in those days people really were black & white.

Whenever the heater was on in my room, it made like a clicking sound as it warmed up. As a child, and with the movie “Freddy Krueger” fresh in my mind, I swore it was Freddy Krueger hiding under my bed and that clicking sound was actually he tapping his fingernails against the wooden floor. It scared me a lot!

I was certain that each of the bands I heard on the radio were at the station performing the music live as I heard it. After living through the 1971 Sylmar earthquake I just knew that an aftershock was coming that would crack California off of the mainland and I’d live on an island like Hawaii. I also believed 100% in my invisible friend Catherine.

@SuperMouse In regards to that, I live in Hawaii. In relation to this topic, I use to think that there was a super-highway connecting Hawaii to the mainland.

@Haroot lurve for that, and for your 180 degree turn quip!

I wouldn’t eat food made by people I didn’t know well. I might be hungry and their cooking looked and smelled delicious and they might have been the nicest people in the world but until I got familiar with them, I would pretend not to want.

I thought that all mountains really had pointy tops like in cartoons (I grew up in Michigan, where there are no real mountains!)

I thought that when people slept – just slept- in the same bed together, they made babies.

When you moved, you kept the stuff that belonged to the previous owners. This belief was motivated by the Lite Brite set in one of the kid’s closets of the house we were set to move into.

When I was really little, I was worried about touching my belly button too much. I thought it was a screw, and it would make my butt fall off.

@crisw wow that’s really weird, now that you mentioned it I remembered doing that too. I would be at a friends house, thirsty or hungry, and if I was offered something I would say no thank you. It’s not that I was afraid of germs, it was more like I was embarrassed. I can’t understand why I did that.
@DrasticDreamer Ive never tried pickles, but I really like sliced bananas in a peanut butter sandwich (not fried though like Elvis).
One more weird kid thing- I went down the condiment isle at the grocery store looking to see what a box of condoms looked like. I heard about them at school, and I figured that would be the right isle.

That I might be appointed by God to be the next virgin mother.

that the united states was going to run out of room for people to live.

I knew that water was alive and could reach through the cracks between the boards in the dock to grab me and pull me under to drown. However, once you got into the boat you would be okay (even though it was a very small boat, 7’ 11” long).

Sometimes the water in the toilet was also alive so you had to go quickly before it realized you were there.

And then I started school.

I believed people who get killed in films really die. I always wondered how they persuaded them to agree, and what happened if they were famous actors, with Oscars and so on. I guessed that they either used someone with a terminal illness (or someone who wanted to commit suicide anyway), or persuaded an actor to do it by promising to pay their family lots and lots of money afterwards.

It still somehow seemed a high price to pay for a film, but I assumed there must be people who’d do it, or else how could the films be made?

I believed that if you left your foot uncovered when you were in bed something from underneath the bed would grab it and drag you away.

I believed that Zips would make you run like the Flash…until I got a pair. fuckin’ liars

I believed that everything was going to always be alright. grew out of that one pretty quick

Until my mom explained what cartoons were, I just thought it was people wearing costumes. Really smooth flat costumes.

If I slept on my back anything could fall onto my eyes during the night, pierce through my thin eyelids and blind me.

I was certain I didn’t have a vagina hole until I was 19 and had sex. Turns out I just had the Arnold Schwarzenegger of all hymen.

There was a radio tower pretty far from my house, I only knew it was there because at night I could see its two slow-blinking red lights. I swore it was Godzilla’s eyes glowing with rage.

I thought that at a certain time at night, traffic stopped.

I thought the big electric organ in my grandma’s living room was a monster. I was scared to death of it. You should’ve heard the noises that came out of that thing!

I believed for years that I was the only person that pooed.

@blondsjon, lurve for Zips. Zips the Big Z!

@Blondesjon I actually had a lion under my bed. It only appeared when lights were off, and would only grab my leg if I stepped out of the bed, I was pretty safe as long as both legs were on the bed, even uncovered.

I read a book on embryos much earlier than I should have, which made me pretty sure that women just eat certain foods which contain sperm, which ends up somewhere in their stomach and grows to be a baby. Better than stork stories, but I didn’t figure out the real details until I was 11 or 12. Oh I knew what sex was, just couldn’t see what it had to do with reproduction.

I believed that Sea Monkeys were truly the little people they made them look like in the ads. I was very disappointed to find out the truth.

In a bratty stage – my mother had ordered a “sample kit” for my sister. All I knew was she was getting new stuff and I wasn’t. Not very good, in my book. Being the whinny brat I was acting like, that day, I got up in a chair next to my sister and started crying, “why did mom give you your period and not give me one? You get all the new period stuff and I get nothing!” the samples were pads, tampons and different things to take for cramps…yeah, not so exciting after all!

I’ll be 38 on Wednesday…I still haven’t lived that one down!

@cak…X-RAY SPECS DIDN’T ALLOW ME SEE THROUGH SHIT!!!

i want reparations

@Blondesjon – I’m with you! I think we could have a class-action lawsuit, if we pulled enough people together!

that i was Raja the tiger from Aladdin.
but thats not weird. its totally legit.

I remember thinking that if you cut yourself, and you put the wounded body part in your mouth, the blood you swallowed would travel through your body and go back to the exact place it came, which was the wounded area.

I also remember not eating hot dogs for a long time after my older brother told me they were made from unborn baby pigs.

@evelyns_pet_zebra
Ha! I think everyone gets some sort of hot dog origin tale as a kid. My older sister’s friend told us they were made of “snouts and udders.”

@crisw – Well, typically they are, plus other bits you might not want to think about.

@Darwin

Oh, I have thought about them plenty- one of the reasons I’m a vegetarian! :>D

@crisw snouts, udders, anuses and the male parts that aren’t labeled as ‘sports’ in the meat aisle of the local supermarket. sports is a euphemism for testicles, aka mountain oysters.

I grew up in the Church of Christ a very old school, strict denomination of Christianity. They, unlike other denominations, do not believe in “being saved” but rather you have to repent every day for your sins. At least that’s how I understand it. So when I was little, I believed this wholeheartedly and was so brainwashed that I was petrified that I might tell a lie or do something else bad and then get hit by a bus and go straight to hell without a chance to repent. Crazy, I know.

Now I don’t even believe in hell, so I’m over it.