General Question

wundayatta's avatar

Can you describe a moment when you felt very close to your child?

Asked by wundayatta (58741points) March 31st, 2009

Obviously, this question is only for parents.

I shall demonstrate the kind of thing I’m looking for in the first answer.

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21 Answers

wundayatta's avatar

Today, my kids are on break, and we’re doing a staycation. My son wanted to go on a bike ride in the cemetary, but I persuaded him to do a ride up the Perkiomen Creek trail. He wanted to stop every five feet to dig under rocks, and skip rocks, and climb trees.

Finally, we got to a place where there were a lot of slate rocks strewn all over, and he was busily turning over every single one that he could. He got to one that he couldn’t turn over, so he asked my help. We lifted the rock, and there beneath it was a crayfish the size of my thumb. We watched it for a while, and he kept wanting me to pick it up, but I didn’t want to, so we let it do it’s thing.

There was this strange smell in the air, and for the longest time, I couldn’t figure out what it reminded me of, and then it hit me. The smell of the beach. When the seaweed has been sitting in the sun too long. I looked around, and I realized there was a lot of rotting material around me.

Then I got to see nature in action! With the obsession with sex on fluther, all of you should have seen this. I saw two geese courting. First the gander had to chase off a bunch of other males. No contact was made, but it was awesome to see the gander pushing himself into the air to do a kind of surface bomb effort at his opponent. I was hopeing it would go on for a while, like in the colleseum, but it was over fast.

Then he swam over to his darling dear, and they swam around each other, in parallel, necks touching like a kiss. It was better than any love scene in a movie!

They did this kind of necking for a while, and then the goose porn started. He jumped on her back, and she sank under so only her head was showing, and two seconds later it was over. They were swimming around, very nonchalontly preening themselves, as if taking a shower after sex.

Then the funniest thing happened. First he stoop, then flopped over on his back and for a second, he was upside down in the water, waving his legs in the air. Then he flapped his way up. I laughed out loud. And then she did the exact same thing. I couldn’t believe it, and I laughed again. It was if they were saying, “wasn’t that fun” I’m so happy to be with you.”

I love going on adventures with my son!

asmonet's avatar

HAHAHA, Goose Sex = lurve.

I love that they had matching touchdown dances.

Jack79's avatar

I have always been extremely close with my daughter, perhaps more than I should. I’ve actually been trying to make her more independent (and my failure to do so is what hurts her so much now). Every moment with her is magical, and we enjoy each other’s company immensely. There was a time when we could even communicate telepathetically. It was the first thing her mother tried to kill.

When she was born, she had a tumour that had to be removed. I took her to hospital and stayed with her, sitting next to the incubator, putting my hand inside through a special hole, and she’d grab my little finger and hold onto it.It’s amazing to describe it now because she was only a few days old, but I am sure she recognised me, and she would look up towards me and stare straight into my eyes as if asking “am I going to be ok daddy?”. I wrote a song for her the day she was born, which I’d sing softly (the nurse didn’t like it much and told me off because she had the radio on and wanted to hear that instead). Anyway, I felt that we could have a conversation just holding hands and looking into each other’s eyes like that, a 90+ kilo grown man with a 1942 gram little baby.

ubersiren's avatar

After a tough birth (and recovery thereof )of my son, I felt detached from my son for his first few months. I loved him, but I felt like I was doing everything wrong and that he didn’t know that I was his mommy.

When he was about 3 months old, I had to go to the DMV to get my license renewed, and while I was waiting, my son in his carrier seat, me on the cheese grater bench, we looked at each other almost the whole time. He smiled, and we played. I smiled and he made cute baby noises. I finally felt like he knew me. As if fate was trying to put the icing on my cake, a woman behind me tapped me on the shoulder and said, “I think someone is in love with you!” Now he’s a total mama’s boy and I love it!

casheroo's avatar

I don’t remember the exact moment. I will admit it wasn’t instant…after giving birth, I was sort of out of it and just plain scared.
It happened within a few days. I became so overprotective of this little being. He and I would just stare at each other, and smile and coo. I’d read to him and he’d kick his legs and make the cutest little excited noises.

He is now 20 months old, and he learns something new each day. When he does something he’ll know I’ll be proud of, he claps for himself and says “yay!!” and looks up to me, looking for encouragement. When he’s scared, he reaches for me. I’ll tell him I love him and he’ll come and snuggle with me, rubbing his face against mine and kissing me. All these little moments make me feel so close to him.

Mr_M's avatar

@daloon , I guess that’s like “6 geese-a-laying”, only with 2?

Kraken's avatar

Never. I need to have some first.

FGS's avatar

I have many but the one that sticks out in my mind the strongest is this moment: I had been deployed to Kosovo between 1999 and 2000 for 8 months. My son was just shy of 2 years old when I left. The night I arrived back home, my wife at the time picked me up at the company with my son in the back seat. I was so excited to see them both after being gone so long. When I sat in the car and turned around in the seat to see my son, he wouldn’t look at me. I called his name and he just turned away and covered his face with his hands. I was crushed and I swear at that moment I could feel my heart ripping apart. We drove home quietly. When I stepped in the house and set down my bags I turned around and saw my son looking at me. I knelt down, opened my arms and he ran into my arms crying “I love you Daddy !!”. I don’t think I have ever cried so hard from being happy.

MissAusten's avatar

@daloon, I love those kinds of moments with my kids! We go hiking a lot, and have to stop to look under every single rock and rotting log. The best moments are when we find a little salamander or some cool insect and the four of us are squatting in a circle together to get a good look. Their fascination for things that many adults wouldn’t take a second look at (or would be grossed out by) is contagious!

I remember when my daughter was a toddler, she picked up this huge, fat earthworm she found under a log. She was so proud of it, carrying it around the yard with a huge grin. Suddenly, the worm exploded into two with goo splattering everywhere. I swear to God, I can still remember this popping noise it made so clearly. I’d never seen anything like that—she wasn’t pulling on it or anything. We both screamed, she dropped the worm, and we ran away like it was going to attack us. I couldn’t stop laughing! I love that kid, because she didn’t even hesitate to pick up the next big worm she found.

wundayatta's avatar

@MissAusten—just as a side note, since your story reminded me of it—the whole point of this trip was to find a salamander, preferably under a rock. We didn’t find one, but I think the crayfish was a suitable substitute!

Likeradar's avatar

I’m tearing up reading these. Lucky parents, lucky kids.

charliecompany34's avatar

when we connect by singing songs together. when they hit every note at perfect pitch and sing with passion the way i would. for them to be so inclined in music at young ages just makes my eyes well with tears, but they don’t notice.

not just songs on the radio, but good gospel music that always has twists and turns and soul. i love to hear my children sing!

augustlan's avatar

There are many, of course, but two stand out. The first was just minutes after my first child was born. They put her in my arms, all messy and gooey, and she immediately started ‘rooting’ for my breast. I helped her find it, she latched on immediately, and it was like all was right in the world. I felt like I was fulfilling my purpose on Earth.

The second involves all three of my girls. I had an appointment in a town I’d never been to, and had to bring the girls along. We arrived very early and rather than have them bored out of their minds sitting in a waiting area forever, we explored a little. We found a lovely pond, bordered by a small wooded area and decided to hang out there for a while. While walking through the woods, we came upon a large circle of damp soil upon which hundreds of butterflies were resting. We crept up to the edge of the circle, marveling at finding such a thing. We crouched to get a closer look, and they suddenly started flying up and around us. As we stood, it was like being in the middle of a tiny butterfly tornado. The joy that moment brought all of us is nearly indescribable. As we had obviously disturbed their environment, we only stayed a moment or two before respectfully backing away and watching them return to their rest. Just thinking about it now brings a smile to my face. :)

FGS's avatar

@augustlan That would be cool to see!!

augustlan's avatar

It was awesome, in the truest sense of the word!

mattbrowne's avatar

When they were sick and then recovered.

Blondesjon's avatar

Every morning before I leave for work I kiss each and every one of them good-bye and tell them I love them. I have done this from the day my sixteen year old was born. No matter what happened the previous day I get a sleepy “love you too”.

‘nuff said.

nebule's avatar

whenever he thinks I’m sad he comes up to me, puts his hand on my shoulder and says “mummy…what up?” – “ok mummy?” I then know I’m doing just fine with him and that his soul is line with mine

hearkat's avatar

I guess it was about a year ago, my son was talking to me about anything and everything. Then he went on to say how he can’t talk about this stuff with any of his friends or even his girlfriend, but only with me… then he said, “you really are my best friend”. Being that I have raised him on my own and had to be nurturer and disciplinarian (and I never tried to be his “buddy” like some parents do) it’s been very hard to balance… but I guess I have managed, because he knows that my love is unconditional and my advice is fair, and so he can be himself with me.

ChadWarden02's avatar

I don’t have a child but I will enjoy the time I have with my future son or daughter.

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