General Question

ohmyword's avatar

Is there a fail-proof way to get over a failed relationship?

Asked by ohmyword (608points) April 5th, 2009
Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

34 Answers

lefteh's avatar

Nope.
Cry, eat, and get back out there.

aviona's avatar

I’m wondering the same thing. I wouldn’t say “fool-proof.”

Time.

There’s some good advice in those threads. vv

cak's avatar

@lefteh!!! It’s always wonderful to see you!

If there was, life would be a lot easier. @Lefteh, @aviona, and @hearkat have it so far. I would add, try to get out for a walk – some kind of exercise (I don’t advise skipping the necessary, almost required, ice cream night.), get together with friends and just allow that time it takes to move a little easier, each day. I hope this passes for you soon. Good luck.

arnbev959's avatar

There is very rarely a fail-proof solution to anything. And relationships are complicated.

Most likely you’ll get over it sooner than you think. Your tags suggest that you already have a good idea of some ways to help heal. Eat some ice cream, start a side project, call up some friends. Best of luck.

skfinkel's avatar

If you find a fail-proof way for anything, publish it. It will made you a star.

cwilbur's avatar

Death would probably get you over the relationship, but it might have a drawback or two.

ru2bz46's avatar

Yoga, or archery…over time.

aviona's avatar

Also, maybe don’t call it a failed relationship. I obviously don’t have all the details here, but to me that just casts a negative light on it all.
Even “a relationship that didn’t work out” is better in my mind. Or simply a breakup or a broken heart. It’s all about connotations and psychology and the subconscious to me…

Jayne's avatar

@ru2bz46; archery should not, of course, be undertaken within visual or ballistic range of the bespoke ex, lest there be…accidents.

ru2bz46's avatar

Good point @Jayne. Luckily my wife pro tem doesn’t care to go to the range. I taught my first wife how to shoot a bow recently, though. It’s a good thing I get along with them both. ;-)

cak's avatar

oh..yeah…maybe archery ranges should be avoided, by some of us!

ru2bz46's avatar

Don’t worry @cak, you’re safe around me.

cak's avatar

@ru2bz46 – good to know! I’m usually my own worst danger, so maybe I’m the one to be afraid of. There should be a warning attached to me, small – but dangerous!

_bob's avatar

You oughta meet my good friend, José Cuervo.

laurenigula's avatar

For me it was get rid of all their shit and keep yourself busy doing your own thing for a while then you’ll be saying ” i dated someone?”

HarmonyAlexandria's avatar

As we can’t forget, the only 100% effective method is to add new memories which effectively bury the failed-relationship in question.

You run the risk of ending up with a string of bad relationships, which is sucky, but the good news is that no individual one stings, they all run together after awhile.

The other benefit is that you might end up having a bunch of good, or at least fun relationships, which also bury bad experiences.

ru2bz46's avatar

@cak You sound like like any of my ex’s… :P

theluckiest's avatar

I like what harmony said. If going to the aquarium is something that reminds you of whoever, then go a bunch of times with a bunch of different people and eventually that burns away the association (more or less). For a while it is like putting salt in the wound.

@asmonet; @aviona “They said time would make all this go away, but it’s time that has taken my tomorrows, and turned them into yesterdays”
I wouldn’t wait for anything, as much as you don’t feel like going out or doing crap. Make yourself.

aviona's avatar

I agree with the aquarium thing, as well. It hurts, but I’ve been doing things like that recently. Making new memories. New associations. I guess they call that moving on!

cak's avatar

@ru2bz46wait…did you just insult me? ;~)

ru2bz46's avatar

@cak LOL! NO! I love my exes. They just tend to be small, yet feisty…and potentially dangerous. :D

cak's avatar

@ru2bz46 -—you know, I really couldn’t argue with that description!

Urban's avatar

30 Rock marathon =p

lefteh's avatar

Good idea…if watching Liz Lemon doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, you have serious issues.

ohmyword's avatar

@lefteh & @Urban agreed, gentlemen!

_bob's avatar

This might also help.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

@ru2bz46: what is it about the small and feisties of the world? sheesh
This thread has rekindled a joy in me to hit the firing range!

as an aside, more than one man has told me the best way to get over one lover is to get under another one. I’ve tried this and have to say, not too shabby folks, not too shabby at all! Thanks dudes for the excellent advice

ru2bz46's avatar

@hungryhungryhortence Hmmm…maybe I need to get under a lover.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

@ru2bz46: I suggest one who is unlikely to gossip, tell or make demands

ru2bz46's avatar

@hungryhungryhortence But I’m not into men. [rimshot!]

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

@ru2bz46: oh no, not that One.

ru2bz46's avatar

@hungryhungryhortence Oh, were you thinking of one in particular? I need contact info!

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