How important is inspiration to your intimate relationships?

I understand what you’re talking about. It’s very important. It’s only happened to me once…we were only together for 6th months or so. It just kind of…fizzled out.

It may have happened with the other relationships for my partners, where I no longer inspired them (although I don’t think that’s how they would have worded it). But they fed me right up until the end, which is why I was always so heartbroken.

@aviona
then it was the 6 months worth living
and I’m sure it’ll happen again

If they don’t inspire you, I feel you’re wasting your time. Sure, it may just be a lack of inspiration at first, but that usually leads to bitterness. Though people can be inspired in different ways, all that matters is what works for you and who you’re with.

Like @hug_of_war – I think that might start the problem, but it can snowball into other things.

I hit that stage with my first husband and held on. (and on, and on.) First being the key word in the sentence. I had just decided that was how my life was going to be, part of me died inside. Other things started happening and his gambling (and cheating) was way out of control. We finally ended our marriage.

@cak
i was so scared of that ‘holding on’ stage that i just ended it once the realization hit me and though i’ve already spoken to my current partner, i didn’t really know we’d be together and it was so scary

@Simone_De_Beauvoir that is true. I wouldn’t really call him a great love, though. The other 3, however, I would.
But, you are right, no regrets.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir – I am envious that you had the strength to do it sooner, rather than later; however, I think I had to learn the lesson. I think, if you were to talk it out with someone, and they saw what direction you started to head, they wouldn’t find you so selfish. They would find you in a place where no one wants to be. The fact of the matter is, you had the honesty to see it for what it really was. Dying. It is hard to make that decision and move on. I admire your strength.

@cak
I don’t know if it was strength…but well it’s not in my personality to sit around and wallow once I make a decision…I also didn’t want to lead either of us on…it was really difficult to say, I remember that…but I never looked back…I know he really didn’t take me seriously, but I was deathly serious

@Simone_De_Beauvoir – I remember hitting that point – where you couldn’t be any more serious if you tried. He came over, said he would be moving in with me. It was time for us to work on things and he had decided that we were going to get back together. I looked at him and told him to go to wherever it was that he was calling home. We were finished and I closed the door. That was all. Nothing else. What I’m sure happened was his girlfriend broke up with him. It was that day that I knew not only was it so over, but I had already moved passed him.

@cak
I am glad you did, I’m glad we both did

I broke up with my 2nd BF when I realized that there was nothing in our relationship that made either of us want to be better people. It felt like we were together for the sake of not being alone. Now I know better than to get entrenched into a relationship like that.