When was the last time you cried?

I have nothing to say about the situation, but I’m pretty sensitive and the last time I cried was last night. I probably average a cry a week.

Wow, I can’t imagine being in that kind of situation. Damn. Given how easy my life is in comparison to that, I guess it’s reasonable that I can’t remember the last time I really cried.

This is serious, and perhaps really life-threatening. There are Samaritan 24 hr hot lines in the UK, if he is there. Someone can give you some advice, also. Call now. Your tears won’t help him. Trained, impartial support might.

http://www.samaritans.org/

And here is a link for hot lines all over the world. http://www.befrienders.org/

And this: http://www.helplines.org.uk/tha_home_page.htm

I last cried when answering a Fluther question about intelligence this morning. It’s nothing compared to that.

I cry periodically simply because I worry about my son and his future (he is bipolar and ODD and not doing at all well in school. He does not play well with others). Sometimes I wish his problem would be as simple as being homosexual but otherwise successful in school, with friends and at work.

I am very sorry to hear about your friend and his short-sighted parents. They are, as is often said, cutting of their noses to spite their faces. However grim it may be to be cut off from family and to be grieving for someone as well, it is still possible to find happiness and create a family, a group of friends who care about each other.

While you can help your friend by being his friend, you may be able to help him more by doing what @gailcalled suggests, getting him in touch with a professional hot line to prevent suicide, and possibly also a support group for people with the same type of parents. He may also need medication to help him pull himself up and start living his life, not the one his parents wanted for him.

I wish you good luck – your friend has a good friend in you. I hope you can get him to realize that.

The last time I cried, that I can remember, is when my father died of cancer in August of 2000. It was one of the most difficult times in my life.

Myndecho, your friend’s actions are a call for help and attention. I’m very sorry to hear about what he has been through in his life so far. It is very important that you seek help for him immediately and not let him be alone for any reasons. You have to act on this now and with the excellent information that @gailcalled has provided.

Your poor friend. :(

(Monday)

I last cried a week ago when one of my pets had breathing distress and I thought he would die and I knew I couldn’t take him to any emergency vet.

Lovely poem, and shows quite a bit of talent Myndecho. It is profound there is no doubt about that.

Last year at the age of middle age something was a time of crying because it looked like my wife and I might split up. Every single day was rotten, and tears would flow like a river. So, I really know how tough sorrow can hit a person because of life’s circumstance.

Even though I was truly shaken, daily. In my case I’d read where Jesus was a man of sorrows and aquainted with grief. It did not take much to find out how unfair it was for Him. Only doing His best to care by; feeding the hungry, healing the sick, helping His friends by laying down His life. Not a lot of fun in His life either.
So I’d cry out with my whole being to please save my marriage even though it looked really hopeless. Arguments and misunderstanding was the daily norm, and it was the first year in 20 years of marriage where we did not get along. The word hurt doesn’t always describe one’s pain.
Through only the grace of God did a miracle take place, and we like each other again, and even love each other again. What happened in the past is just where it stays. In the past.
Although I’m still apt to cry when talking about our kids. Or how much I can love my wife, and how she shows her love daily by taking care of me, a disabled man.

I’m feel such empathy for your friend at such a huge loss of his precious friend
.
In fact I’m a little misty eyed right now, and promise to say a prayer for his situation.

@3or4monsters
I want to make him happy as much as I can, we live so far apart i never get to see him in person. Knowing when he was in hospital no one turned up to see him made my heart hurt so badly, I’m trying my best to see him soon.

Last night.

I go to boarding school, and we’re currently on Easter break. The first news I receive when I walk in the door is that my mother has stage 3 Melanoma. I’m scared to death. I’m her person… the one she talks to about everything… the one she relies on for everything… and I have to return to school Monday night, only a few hours after her surgery…. I don’t know what to do.

This makes me cry.

“Mans days are full of trouble as the sparks fly upward”

That is so terrible to face that. Especially as what seems like a young person who is so close to their mother.

I’m hoping for you.

@Sloane2024: In addition to love and emotional support, make yourself the world’s leading expert on the Melanoma and treatments. Docs. and nurses are usually careful but you want to double-check and question everything (in a courteous way). Be her Ombudsman. She will not be thinking clearly.

I have a good friend who had a melanoma on her back removed over 20 years ago. There is a little crater and some scarring, but no one cares and she is alive and well.

Can you get a hardship extension for your exams and final papers? Now would be the time. How far apart are you geographically? Be pro-active. Are there any other close friends or family members who can share this with you?

As far as making myself the leading expert on the disease, I’m currently doing that. Every shred of information I can find that is valid and legitimate I’m committing to memory.

I could try for the hardship extension, but it really would do me no good. I’d get so immensely behind in work that it would be impossible to catch up by the end of May. We’re about two hours apart, which isn’t very far, but this boarding school is the equivalent of a university as far as academics are concerned; therefore, there’s no way I could commute during this time, plus, the fact that I’m only 17 would deter my mother from allowing me that much “road time”. She wants to keep everything a secret. My maternal grandmother doesn’t even know… My dad (her ex husband) is aware, but all he is interested in is taking advantage of her in this vulnerable state. I want to fix her.. make it better, but my inability to do so is emotionally crippling. Dealing with that is almost harder than the news of her cancer.

Thank you so much for your help, @gailcalled.

@Sloane: One piece of unasked-for advice. See whether you can persuade your mother that keeping the secret is also emotionally exhausting and may entail lying, which is also counter-productive. I am truly sorry to hear about your dad. He should be hog-tied.

If you can possibly remind yourself that making yourself a nervous wreck and emotional cripple will not help either you or your mom (and I know that the central nervous system is hard to control), you will be better off. Unless you can find the cure for Melanoma in the next year, you will be a bigger help if you can stay objective. Does your mom have a health care proxy and medical directive? You are too young but it is vital that she get her ducks in a row before the surgery.

a couple of hours ago. My daughters Mother in law died last night and we went ahead and celebrated our grandson’s birthday today. My heart is aching.

I’m getting scared I haven’t heard from him in a few days.

You should seriously call someone who can call, though. He could be a danger to others if he tries to take his own life in something like a car crash. Gail gave some good links.

@toomuchcoffee911
I don’t know where he lives, his phone number, only his MSN addy.

@Myndecho I see how it could be hard. (I’m guessing an MSN addy is some sort of communication thing) could you ask him?

when i was 9 or 10

I don’t remember, but it was most likely because of a movie, not real life.