Fellas, did you have a 'My Buddy' or other doll as a kid?
Do you think it affected you one way or another? Is there a similar toy today? I try to stay gender neutral with toys for my son and was thinking of getting him a doll of sorts. He has some stuffed animals, but no human babies or anything… Suggestions? Comments?
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I did have one…. but I think I was done with it at an early age (I have only vague conscious memories of it). And I haven’t seen them around for a while.
I’m not sure what you could get today. How old is your son? If he’s really young like 5 and under, you could get away with like “semi-feminine” toys, like elmo or something. Teddy bears are alright as long as they’re VERY plain.
Once he hits like 5–6 though, he’s gonna want “boy” toys.
I had a cardboard box and my imagination.
I had no dolls as a child, and now I’m only five feet five and a half inches tall. I think it stunted my growth. Wish I’d had a My Buddy (whatever that is).
My brother had a Tiny Tears doll. Actually he had two, because I swapped mine to him for his dump truck. He gave them up when he started school, but as an adult he has been an excellent father.
My son had several baby dolls when he was little, because, after all, he was a baby and was aware of that fact. However, any Barbie that was unlucky enough to fall into his hands was immediately stripped naked and dismembered. He is perfectly normally attracted to girls these days (and motorcycles, bulldozers and four-wheelers), but also is very good with helping with the babies at church.
Since it takes both a man and a woman to create babies, and since it really, really helps if there are two parents to care for the babies they make, I think it is just fine for a very young boy to have a baby doll. After that you need to go with what he wants (within reason).
I also have known some boys who have grown up to be fashion designers – some of them did have Barbies that remained intact but that were really, really well-dressed.
Do the Voltron lions count as a “doll”? If not, then no. :-)
I had a G.I. Joe with Kung Fu grip. I played soldier and war.
(I will point out, however, that now, at age 30, I have a larger-than-expected collection of stuffed animals. Entirely from (mostly female) friends, of course, but still. And yes, about 75% of them are various Mickey Mouses)
I’m not a guy, but I’ll answer for one. Or two, actually.
My now 30 year old brother has a Cabbage Patch kid named Eric. He got it when he was 6 or so. He still has Eric at our parents’ house and I caught him saying “hi” to it last time we were both home. :) I don’t think having Eric effected him negatively at all. In fact, having a “baby” to tend to probably brings out a nurturing side of boys. And they’re fun to throw against a wall, too.
“My” 5 year old has “Superman Buddy,” a big soft Superman doll. I got it for him when he was 3. It’s great to wrestle with and jump on and it just lays on the bed when friends come over. But he still occasionally tucks it in at quiet time.
Getting your son a doll is a great idea (Superman Buddy came from Target, btw). If it’s not his thing, no great loss. But even just you buying it for him will show him that it’s ok if he wants to nurture something.
Action man, cindy… they are all dolls. I had a big baby doll when I was small. My son has a baby doll who he “talks” to and plays with sometimes. Not his favorite toy though. Cars is his passion. He has a small Wall-E robot he loves, running around shouting “Wall-Eeeeee”.
He doesn’t speak in real sentences yet, and some of his vocabulary is in english.
My mother never bought me dolls, just spiderman, G.I. joes, X-men, and other cool misc figurines. She would come home and see cardboard boxes with “trap doors” cut in them. Strings tied to lamps, ceiling fans, and anything else in the house I could make a zip-line out of for my toys.
My brother had a “My Buddy” doll. Most horrifying child’s toy ever made! After me and my brother watched Child’s Play. We decided he couldn’t be trusted so we did what any kid in their right mind would do beat him to death, wrapped him in clothes, and stuffed him in the attic. Years later me and my mother was cleaning out the closet and there was Buddy. He still scares the crap out of me.
i have stuffed animals as a kid, so don’t laugh
I believe we have a child the same age, and I’m going through the same exact thing.
My husband thinks buying a doll for our son would be weird, but I’ve seen my son at his cousins house, playing with her dolls. He cares for them, pretends to feed them, puts the in strollers.
I really don’t see what the problem would be. I think it would be beneficial to a child, because then they can mimick what we do and show love towards something.
I might just get a basic babydoll for my son. He isn’t really into his stuffed animals (and of course he has a ton of them) he does like a blue shark that he loves to wrestle. It’s the only stuffed animal he’s really connected with.
I have stuffed animals as an adult, so what does that say about me? don’t answer that if you are going to be cruel.
My son really, really likes his giant purple rabbit. He’s fourteen. What does that say about him?
And I had stuffed animals and plastic dinosaurs until I had kids. Then they took them away from me. When they move out I’ll get more.
I wish I had a My Buddy now!
He’s 2 for whoever asked. And he has stuffed animals. I was thinking about a doll specifically to teach him about babies, since we’re trying for a baby of our own. I feel like some human doll would give him a way to feel like he can care for something in a nurturing manner which he hasn’t dealt with yet.
@daloon: You funny, funny man.
To clarify for all—-
In case I sounded like a douche bag, I wasn’t asking if having a doll made you gay or made you grow a vagina. I’m simply wondering if it made your more or less nurturing, or more interested in caring for a baby, or whatever. I tend to think that women are naturally nurturing and men, somewhat less. Generally, of course… I know there are certainly non-nurturing women out there. But, I’m not sure if that’s society, or upbringing or truly our nature. The intent of my question was to get a small sampling of the impact dolls have on a boy (whether he showed interest in it) and on up through adulthood (whether you think you benefited or have been hindered from it).
@ubersiren I think it’d be a fantastic way to introduce a baby into the household so he’ll know what to expect when you have the real thing home with you. You can teach him to be gentle, which, for me, is my number one concern with my toddler lol
@ubersiren What the impact of dolls have on boys I feel would be speculation. Honestly, I don’t think it has any. Your interests and values come from somewhere else. I think one statement from a parent has more impact than any play with toy’s.
@oratio : I don’t know about that. Touching, feeling, pretending, experimenting, becoming emotionally involved with toys is a big part of child development. In addition, of course, to active parenting.
@oratio – But isn’t a parent giving a male child a doll a type of statement?
Oooh, good point, @Darwin.
@casheroo: That’s my number one concern as well. My parents did that with me when I was 2 and it turned out great. They still have my baby at their house—- her name is Constantinople!
Hey, we have that same Stitch!
@ubersiren I agree. Role playing is important. But I don’t think a boy would turn out different if he had dolls or not. If they wanna role play, they’ll do it with or without a doll.
@Darwin For some maybe. The intentions of a parent probably varies. Refusing to get boys dolls is a statement too. My son likes the doll and we sometimes have “conversations” all three of us, but I am not pushing him to play with anything. His car passion certainly didn’t come from home. I don’t believe in “managing” a childs interests, and I don’t think you do them a service if you try to “sculpt” their minds and interests.
@oratio – So give all the kids the same toys and let them sort it out. Without comment.
Not so much that they would “turn out” different, but if they would gain value or not is my wonder. Would it change his sensitivity toward babies, would he be more comfortable around a newborn baby brother, etc. You are right that he will role play even without a doll, though. To some extent he does it with our cat, but that’s only as much as she will allow before becoming annoyed and running upstairs.
@Darwin No, listen to and read your child I would say. They are all different. I think imposing my own wishes on him regardless of what he likes, would be wrong. I won’t force him to eat carrots if he doesn’t want to. It won’t make him like carrots.
Does this make sense?
Well I’m surely not going to force him to play with a doll if he doesn’t want to… hahaha… that’s some Mommy Dearest shit!
@ubersiren I don’t know. Pertaining your previous comment Maybe. My son has come to a phase where he is still interested in babies, but now thinks they are quite boring. They can’t play with him. Though you might be right that having dolls can inspire and deal with his emotions around babies. I think they should have the opportunity to play with baby dolls if they want to.
Last comment: Haha, yeah.
@oratio – If a child has several toys of various types to choose from and you allow the child to choose freely then you are allowing the child to read him or herself, a valuable skill for being able to make choices in the future.
Until they made their preferences known, each of my kids got a baby doll, a ball, a truck, some building blocks, something to make noise with, some dress up clothes, something to climb on, and some books. Which they preferred and what they did with them was up to them as long as no one got hurt and nothing was destroyed.
@Darwin True. I think they should have the freedom to chose themselves and find out what they like. Then again, I see parents filling up their kids rooms with new toys every week. I don’t think excess is good for the child. But that’s another thing and not what you meant.
With all that being said, I still constantly doubt myself as a father. I think I know what I’m doing, and there are no books in the world that can tell me that. But he seems happy and social, so it seems to work.
@oratio – I believe that if someone thinks they know what they are doing as a parent they are extremely overconfident. Even if you have raised kids before, each child is a new adventure and a new opportunity to get it sometimes wrong and sometimes right.
@ubersiren thanx to you i’ve had the farking jingle in my head all day (My buddy and me… or Kid sister and me).
I hated those ads and today i had to sit through a lot of patients and for the life of me i could not stop repeating that friggin jingle in my head over and over.
So to answer your question no i never owned one since the jingle itself to me was like nails on a chalkboard but the thing still got stuck in my head and to this day i even remember the friggin music.
Argh.
My son was three when my daughter was born. Every few months, the hospital offered a big brother/ big sister class. The kids toured the nursery, got a baby care kit (bottle, diaper, bib, etc), a paper mask that doctors wear, those elastic shoe covers, a hair cover, and a baby care coloring book. Every single day my son made his favorite stuffed monkey into his baby. He loved taking care of it. We even let monkey ride in the new car seat if we went somewhere. My son was also into trucks, cars, superheroes, mud, motorcycles, bugs, worms, and other “boy” stuff.
Gender neutral has lost some of it’s meaning of late but that shouldn’t stop you. Just get the kid whatever he likes. I used to play with trucks and guns and bikes and bugs and all that other good stuff.. ut i was also really into classical music, played 4 instruments and loved reading… i have a strong nurturing side which comes out when i have peds patients…. i don’t think my toys really had anything to do with it.. but the way my parents brought me up had EVERYTHING to do with it.
I even remember playing with my girl cousins when no one else was around and the choices were tea party or barbie…. i still had fun and don’t think it affected me one way or another.
The best way to figure out what toys to get your kid is to see what he likes and/or responds to in a toy store. Go with his tastes not with what other people tell you is good for him or “the IT toy”.
I had loads of action figured and plushies as a kid, maybe that counts.
A doll specifically for boys?? Now I’ve heard it all.
At least none of my toy trucks were pink.
Do they even make toy trucks for girls? if not, why not?
@Darwin I haven’t seen any girly trucks. Have you been to a Toys R Us lately? It is the most gendered place in the world.
Barbie has a camper van and a tour bus. Do those count as trucks?
@elijah – No, not really. You can’t haul stuff with those. You need an 18-wheeler like Little Tikes’ gray and purple job, or some of those nice yellow, metal Tonka trucks.
Now that I am a big girl I have a Chevy Crew Cab 2500HD with the towing package and the 8-foot bed, but it’s a little big for the toy box.
Those metal tonka dump trucks are solid. We used to sit in the dump part and race them downhill :)
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