I’m kind of struggling to put it into words. I was no raving Michael Jackson fan, even back in the day, I mean, not in the sense that I’d sleep outside for 2 nights to get tickets to one of his shows 500 miles away or anything like that. I was 11 years old when Thriller came out, though…and I could not miss how it took the world by storm. At that time, I hadn’t really started listening to popular music yet…my dad has just never liked music, and my mom was into country and oldies. I never got country, particularly the variety that she listened to on AM radio in the 70s and 80s when I was growing up (now the pre-rock and roll era country, that was something else altogether). But I always enjoyed oldies, and certainly Motown was a big part of that. I knew the songs of the Jackson 5 and was fascinated when MJ had become a huge star with Thriller that this was the same person singing ABC and Beat It.
Essentially, Thriller was the album that got me and my friends, cousins, and other people in my peer group into popular music. I started to notice it was just everywhere. My mom’s sister’s daughter, about 3 or 4 years younger than me…I’d go to her house and we’d sit there for hours with her two older brothers, one one year older than me and one 3 years older than me, playing Atari and listening to Thriller on a continuous loop. Then there was my dad’s sister’s son, 3 years younger than me and friends of his 1 and 2 years younger than me respectively….I’d go to their house and play some other early 80s videogame system and listen to Thriller on continuous loop. I’d go to friends houses, every kid my age had a copy, knew every lyric to every song, pretty much listened to it nonstop.
There was something about that album. It has sold somewhere between 100 million and 109 million copies worldwide, and to realize just how incredible that is, not only has NO ONE else ever sold more than 100 milliion copies, no one else has sold even 50 million copies of a single album. The next biggest seller is AC/DC’s Back in Black, and that sold “only” 45 million copies. And consider that the album had 9 tracks, and SEVEN of them became top ten singles. Also consider that it is widely acknowledged that MTV was a struggling cable station until they played Billie Jean, THAT is what put them on the map. And so popular was he that even a curly haired, whiny voiced, accordion playing comedian who called himself Weird Al was able to ride his coattails to become a household name in his own right. Simply put, if you were anywhere from 8 to 16 when Thriller came out, then you experienced something the likes of which you will never see again, and the man deserves credit for that, no matter what he did before or after.
And part of Jackson’s appeal was not just what he created on that album, a sound that was all his own, but his unbelievable dancing abilities. He created dance moves that were simply mind-blowing, but he didn’t stop there. He harnessed the power of storytelling via the music video and went far beyond what anyone had ever even thought to try. And the real telling thing for me was how my parents and the parents of my friends and cousins reacted to him….not favorably. It really struck me that what I was seeing was the same as the folklore I’d heard regarding the early days of rock…my parents’ parents generation who were scared shitless by Elvis’ pelvis and the Beatles’ mop tops. And then he started calling himself the “King of Pop”, and why not? Your album outsells everything that’s every been produced throughout the history of music, then damnit, you can call yourself the King.
Now my understanding is that MJ was molested by an uncle at age 6. I’ve also read that the fact that he was practically born into the public eye, put out in front of all his older brothers who had years of experience on him, playing instruments, dancing, singing and entertaining…and yet here’s this kid, barely out of diapers, not just supporting all his siblings, but LEADING them. He worked non-stop, and it screwed him up, and put him in the position where his uncle, who was also a road manager, could twist his ideas about the proper form of love an affection. But we did not know all that in the mid 80s, when Thriller continued to be a phenomenon. The album was the best seller at Christmas in 1982, 1983 AND 1984…it just wouldn’t stop. Michael became rich and powerful, and for once, no one could question him…he was the undisputed master of his own destiny, and he earned it, he struggled to get there, and he had this amazing and unique talent unlike anything the world had ever seen.
Unfortunately, his inner child had never been fed, he had a lifetime of responsibility, and it was time to cut loose and do what HE wanted to do. He wanted a pet chimp. He wanted to take Webster to the Grammys. He wanted to sleep in an oxygen chamber. He wanted his own amusement park. And he could afford it. Now, based on all that has been written, it’s pretty plausible that he was also able to start satisfying some of his unnatural urges, being afforded the company of children whose parents would never suspect the King of Pop was a sexual predator…if anything he seemed to be sexless. And one of his biggest hits WAS after all about a woman who accused him of fathering her illegitimate child. Hell, the parents often saw Michael Jackson grow up on TV before their very eyes, you can’t look at that little boy singing A,B,C and think he’s going to rape your 12 year old…not possible.
But again, we didn’t know about any of this…we knew he was weird, and we knew weirdness seemed to follow him, from the white glove with which he repeatedly grabbed his crotch, to his hair catching on fire when Pepsi paid him like a billion dollars to do a commercial for them. Barry Gordy’s kid needed a little bump to get his Rockwell project off the ground, hey, we’ll call Michael. Everyone wanted a piece of him. He had to reunite with his brothers even though he’d left them in the dust to do a fairly unimaginative album which still sold gangbusters and produced a tour that people practically sold their kidneys to get into. Oh yeah, and the kids in Ethiopia are starving and the Brits all got together and sang a song for them….let’s get Michael to whip out a song for the US so we can do the same thing with our names of the day. Everyone wanted a piece of Michael. Then came Bad, which was another phenomenon…OK, only 30 million records sold, but very few have done even THAT. And the first album ever to have five #1 singles, beating the Beatles previous record. It was the album where he was able to assert the most creative control he’d ever had.
And he was whiter than before. He was tougher than before. And he had a smaller nose than before. The album was great, and it was everywhere, but it was no Thriller, and it began to be overshadowed by his weirdness. Still, most had to admit that he had added something exceptional to his already matchless list of achievements. But as time dragged on, his nose got smaller and smaller. His skin got whiter and whiter. By the time Dangerous came out, grunge was starting to take over the world, and Jackson didn’t help matters when he debuted a video which essentially contained about 10 minutes of him grabbing his crotch and beating the shit out of a car. Then he started to hang out with MacCaulay Culkin, yet another young boy on his arm everywhere, and people started to forget the magic spell he’d cast over a generation. The people whose kids were visiting Neverland did not watch MJ grow up with the Jackson 5, they grew up right along with him. His nose started to fall off. He began to wear surgical masks in public. Then it happened…a kid accused him of molestation.
Now, objectively, part of me said he was an easy target, if you were a gold digger and wanted to pick a believable target, who better than a stunted man child with his own theme park who liked to let kids sleep over? But his denial where he practically spat out the words was the classic behavior of someone who is guilty. And the fact that he paid the kid off, well if he was so innocent, this story basically ended him, he could have sued for slander and gotten that family exposed as a fraud, and it could have turned things around for him. But he paid the kid for his silence. And that was the day, as far as I was concerned, that Michael Jackson died.
So the news today is sad…we’ve formally now lost one of the most multi-talented people who ever lived. But he would never have had another Thriller. Hell, he would never have even had another Bad or Dangerous. He would ALWAYS have the undying adoration of a great number of fans who would have undoubtedly packed his concert performances in his upcoming “comeback”, but he was a has been, a nostalgia act. He was someone who despite his monsterous success would be forever thought of by the masses for his troubles, his eccentricities, his failings, despite the fact that his successes and achievements might never be matched.
So, yes, as I see it, Michael Jackson the entertainer ceased to exist 16 years ago, and Michael Jackson the possibly dangerously mentally ill freak took his place. He married Elvis’ daughter, he had kids (or in the case of the youngest, bought kids) who hopefully weren’t quite old enough for his tastes yet when he died. He began living a life of sheer lunacy, dangling babies off balconies…then yet ANOTHER kid accuses him of molestation….a kid he admitted to sharing his bed with on a TV special where he introduced us to his new son Blanket for Christ Sakes.
Jackson was fucked up at best, dangerous at worst. If he was hurting children, at least he won’t be able to do it anymore, and if he wasn’t, well then perhaps the at least is that he’s free from his own crazy mind. Maybe his kids will have another chance at a half way normal life now. Maybe the real truth will come out now….maybe they’ll find a sex dungeon where he had his way with little boys, or maybe a cloud of suspicion will always exist. But no matter what happens, he gave the world Thriller. And even though the guy who gave us Thriller ceased to exist 16 years ago, with him a piece of musical history died today. And even though I was always more of a rock fan than a pop fan, it’s those days listening to Thriller and playing video games that came to mind and brought a tear to my eye today. So I guess I feel that I loved him for what he was, hated him for what he probably was, and respect what he accomplished, and I can’t deny his status as an icon, whose music and dancing will outlive every last one of us. And I just have to close by saying, I don’t know how he did what he did with Thriller, but I’m glad I was there, that it was my generation that experienced that magic, and I thank him for that, even if I detested everything else about him.