Paying for bridesmaids dresses?

Yeah… :)
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I agree one hundred percent with you. Although – If you go to a costume party (wedding), you always have to buy your own costume. You never assume the host will provide the costumes (dresses) for you. So…..Yeah.

Plus, unless all of your bridesmaids live in the immediate area, they have to pay to fly/stay wherever the wedding is.

If you are worried about making your bridesmaids pay for dresses, flights, etc. because some of them might be strapped for cash, you can always insist that their participation in your wedding is their wedding gift to you, and tell them really not to feel obliged to buy you china or whatever on top of that. Just a thought.

Whenever anyone asks me to be a bridesmaid, I always anticipate having to pay for the dress, shoes etc.

In one wedding, the cost of the dress was a little high, which the bride felt badly about, so she paid for us to have our hair and nails done prior to the ceremony.

What you may want to consider doing though, is finding a way to make it cheaper for them by finding the dress at a less-expensive price. I think in a previous post, I mentioned that JCrew has great bridemaids dresses that are classic, easy to use for other occasions, and subject to JCrews sales.

http://www.jcrew.com/ms/weddingshop/wedding.jhtml?id1=cat280504

I have been in six weddings (I know, I know) and have a myriad of bridesmaids dress experience. I most definitely understand your dilemma and having been on the receiving end of 5 out of 6 of the dresses now taking up valuable closet space and not to mention costing a fortune, I have some recommendations for you. figbash’s suggestion of getting bridesmaids dresses at JCrew is a good one. Personally I find JCrew a little pricey, but as a female who loves to shop I would much rather pay a little more for a dress that I can wear again rather than a dress that will sit in my closet for the next 2 years because I have nothing better to do with it. Also, I was recently in a wedding where the bride had the same feelings you did and decided that we could pick out our dresses ourselves, her only stipulation was that it was a black cocktail dress. All of the bridesmaids ended up going out and finding a matching outfit which turned out to be the cutest an most wearable bridesmaids outfit I have bought. Also, we ended up getting the whole thing for under $40. So, we all matched and loved our outfits. When people asked us where we found them not only were they astonished by the price, but also by the stores we purchased them from. Another idea is that if you find a dress you love, but the cost is a little exorbitant, you can suggest that they sell their dresses back to a consignment shop. They won’t get back all of their money, but they will be able to get back some of it. And if your bridesmaids are really strapped for cash, figbash’s idea of paying for them getting their hair done is a good one. But remember that this is your wedding day, and while you don’t want to be bridezilla, this day is about you.

well lets say i am getting married and i ask my 2 best friends to be my best men. like inviting one to dinner i feel the need to pay for it. having to put that obligation on their shoulders i think is disrespectful. i will of coarse pay for the attire of the event.

I have been in weddings where the bride bought the dresses for everyone, and in weddings where the bridesmaids paid for their own dresses. It was a matter of financial resources—the bride’s family could afford it, so they did it to take the pressure off the bridesmaids, who were already spending a ton of money on flights/lodging/engagement party/bachelorette party, etc etc.
BTW, wedding etiquette guides says that if the bride wants the bridesmaids to have hair/makeup/nails professionally done, it is her responsibility to pay for it.

I can offer another suggestion: you can ask your bridesmaids to buy a dress of a certain color and material, and let them choose their own, individual dresses. One of the reasons it can be a bummer to spend money on a bridesmaid’s dress is that the dresses tend to look very bridesmaid-y and can’t be worn again. My matron of honor and maid of honor both wore light blue silk dresses. The lengths and styles of the dresses were different, but because they were the same color and material, they looked beautiful together. And it looks really nice in the photos, too—they match, but look like themselves at the same time.

Of course, you’d want to be specific about the shade of the color—light, medium, or dark.

Also, at the wedding rehearsal dinner, you’ll have an opportunity to thank your bridal party and give them each a gift. Some brides choose to give an accessory that they’d like the bridesmaids to wear—which enables you to request that they wear something you’ve chosen, without making them pay for it. For example, a pretty bracelet that can be a keepsake, or earrings, or perhaps a shawl to throw over their shoulders. Or you can give each of your friends a personalized gift.

You can avoid this problem by letting them pick their own dress in a color pallet – see how I did it at http://realgreenweddings.blogspot.com/

I’m getting married in October. This whole experience of having all these parties for me and people buying things for me is weird. I also felt weird about having the girls have to pay for there dresses. However nobody has to be in your wedding but they choose to because it is an honor to do so. Therefor paying 1, 2, 3 hundred is a small price to show your appreciation to the one you are standing up for. Also don’t forget that you will be buying them a thank you gift for standing up. What comes around goes around. Have fun I hope this helps!

I have asked my bridesmaids to pay for their dress and I informed them when they were asked to be in my wedding that there would be a cost and they were fine with that. The dress that I wanted was a little higher then I expected so I put in some of the cost for each. However, 3 weeks before the wedding one of my bridesmaids came to me and said that she cannot afford it and that the dresses are way too pricy and that it is customary and respectful for the bride to cover the full cost of the bridal parties attire because it is her day and not theres.

what about getting dress on rent. See in this no one needs to pay high amount. and bridesmaid can same kind of dress. Majorly bridesmaid do not wear these dresses again so bridesmaids dresses on rent is good option.