How many zombie escape plans do you have for the impending zombie uprising?

Having no brains, I worry not.

waking up.
but i shall be honest.
i will turn into a super saiyajin and destroy all zombies with my kamehameha.

Just one plan. But I’ve got no idea how I’ll get Milla Jovovich to move in with me on that kind of short notice.

1. Find and travel to the area with the lowest population density.
2. Hope no zombies (or angry vagabonds) find me.

This might give you an idea.

http://bumperstickers.cafepress.com/stickers/design/16705108

A highly reputable news source has debated this in the past, as well. Worth taking a look at!

wha?

My girlfriend has actually discussed this with me in all seriousness. She wanted to make sure that I knew that if she ever became a zombie, I am at liberty to do whatever harm to her I need to to save myself. It was really quite sweet.

There are a few very simple rules that will during a zombie apocalypse:
-Keep your car in good working order
-Never use fire against zombies.
-Never go take a shower.

This meme needs to die. Or die again. Whatever.

News item:
Hollywood producers are supposedly engaged in a bidding frenzy to nab the movie rights of Seth Grahame-Smith’s novel Pride And Prejudice And Zombies

As I looked at the cover of this book, I thought it might be a good idea to refresh myself on the original. I called my sister Linda, who is my phone-a-friend on all things Bronte or Austin, and she recommended the BBC miniseries with Colin Firth and Jennifer Ehle, but since that is a bit long, I started thinking about the 2005 version with Keira Knightley.
Now, Keira is a rare beauty…no question. If beauty were brains, she would be Albert Einstein, but she isn’t very bright. As a matter of fact, if brains were beauty, she would probably be Einstein.
And zombies, of course, love to munch on brains. The idea of pitting her against zombies might not be such a bad idea.
Just sayin’

None. I’ll be the Zombie Queen. I love zombies.

well, my apartment is an upstairs apartment, and I have neighbors below me. The first thing I would do is stock up on supplies, get some hand held games, a generator, and the necessities.

I’d fill my bathtub, and sinks up with water (eventually the water will cut out). I’d be sure to have some semi automatic pistols, and rifles with plenty of ammunition. My melee weapon of choice would be a crow bar (if I needed, I can pry open doors that are locked if on the move, and it won’t ever break by beating in zombie skulls).

After I’m fully stocked, which may take some time, I will use a sledge hammer to destroy the stairs leading up to my apartment, and to be sure I’d have a rope I could use to climb back down if needed.

I’d be fully stocked up, armed to kill zombies, and they would be unable to make it up to my apartment since I have destroyed access by taking down the stairs.

I would hold out as long as possible, and when I feel it to be safe, I’d make my way to a marina of some sort, and try and make my way out to some sort of oil rig out in the ocean and focus on just surviving out in the elements, fishing and things like that, maybe eventually locate an island, live off the land and so on.

Assuming it got that bad, I suppose I could hold out for at least a couple months if I ration my food appropriately.

One word: bacon!

I have seventeen separate escape plans. They include eleven land escapes, four escapes by water, and an additional two escapes by air.

Each plan serves as a compatible back-up plan to two other separate plans, while simultaneously having two back-up plans of its own. Theoretically, in case of emergency, I can cycle through each plan seamlessly and without getting caught up or falling behind in any one plan.

I am currently developing an additional two routes for subterranean escapes, though it poses logistic problems for transitions into an aerial evacuation, so I may have to restructure the back-up matrix to fit the new evacuation methods.

I will be publishing all of this relatively soon, if you’re interested in developing parallel evacuation plans.

Also, I’ll run out and buy The Zombie Survival Guide.

Edit: well I guess I could steal it if it’s the apocalypse and everything.

@monsoon I already own it, great read by the way.

I’m buying it tomorrow. ^_^

Thank you for all the feedback! It was very helpful. I’m working on a persuasive speech on zombies.

Persuasion? There is no persuading to do; the threat is evident and impending. Just tell the people the facts and, in the end, I suppose only the wise will survive.

@erniefernandez ^_^ to clarify, the speech is not about persuading people that zombies are real (the smart ones that deserve saving will know this), the speech is in persuading them to take particular courses of action once it occurs.

Is there any way I could get involved in this initiative?

I can’t decide if it would be a great idea or a horrible one to try to gain access to a prison of some sort. On the one hand, they are probably the most defensible structures you are likely to find in a city, well-stocked with food and weapons, and perhaps in possession of equipment that could be used to make contact with other survivors. On the other hand, if the prisoners had not been released, and infection had been introduced to the premises, the cell blocks would be…nasty, to say the least.

My schoolmates at the college actually had an in-depth discussion about where to go for supplies and how to fortify our location against an uprising of the undead persuasion. We only have the one plan, but it is quite comprehensive.

@erniefernandez my plan is to study your plans.

FIrst, kill @jeanna because otherwise, she’d eat my brains.

Travel to a rural area with the best supplies that one can get in this situation.

Be alone.

Wait 3 days.

@boots You won’t be able to kill me! Besides, we’ll be beside each other when it happens and I’ll turn you first. :)

I have developed a sound-based device (something like a theremin on steroids) that controls zombies. Should the ZA happen, I have already filled a hidden room with several large forklift batteries, a charger that works on a combination solar/animal motion/gravity well process and while the rest of you are being eaten by the hordes of the undead, I will be safe in my underground bunker, controlling them with my SBD.

Food and water won’t be a problem, as I live in a rural area with several private wells, a ten acre garden surrounded by high walls and booby traps of the most devious design, and I have been raising six legged chickens for food. The only problem I can foresee is that if the chickens escape, they can be pretty difficult to catch, having six legs instead of only two.

@evelyns_pet_zebra Caution: Six-legged chickens can potentially become zombie chickens with sixteen extra talons with which to attack you.

@erniefernandez I have considered that, and have installed security crows armed with mini cattle prods charged with 660 amp battery cells. The crows serve two purposes, one they keep the chickens safe from hawks and two, they are intensively trained to seek out and destroy zombie chickens. The only way to successfully mount the mini cattle prods on the crows to keep from interfering with their flight ability was to place them between their legs. So the crows look like they suffer from an extreme case of priapism.

@evelyns_pet_zebra I’m afraid none of that will save you from me and my zombie minions when the time comes. However, you’ll have tons of fun being a zombie with me. ;)

@evelyns_pet_zebra Don’t listen to @jeanna!!!

She will put you away the second you inconvenience her quest for the zombie throne.