Have you been bullied by your older siblings?

Yes, we don’t speak.

I was bullied by an older cousin who hung out at my house all the time. The thing is, as my brothers grew older, he shifted his bullying toward them and started to include me in it. Once he was out of the picture, I continued the bullying on my brothers, though not as harshly as he did.

Years later, I feel overwhelmed with guilt about it. I wish I could go back in time and shake some sense into my younger self. I’ve talked to my brothers about these feelings and though two of them were understanding and forgiving, the youngest one still holds a grudge against me. I’ve tried for years to mend our relationship, but he’s stubborn and indignant.

I don’t know how it is in your particular situation, but maybe your brother feels bad about the bullying the way I do. If so, please give him a chance to fix things. Even if he is ambivalent about the whole thing, it would probably be healthy for you to confront him and let him know how you feel about the whole thing. It’s always better to try to fix things than leave them broken; later in life, you might change your mind and it could be too late.

No, my older sister hasn’t really bullied me. I mean, of course, like all older siblings, she would tease me sometimes and we fought over things sometimes, but nothing too bad.

My mom had a friend who was nothing short of abused by her older brother (who was older by several years). Of course, that was back in the ‘60s and she wouldn’t admit to it, but that is what happened. It’s not like she would ever fight him, but he was always hitting her and such. Their relationship was completely severed and they haven’t spoken in decades. I would try to avoid something like that happening.

Siblings shouldn’t beat up on their other siblings, that isn’t really “normal” and I wouldn’t say what your brother is doing is “right” at all. I’m in the middle, so I’ve had experience with both, but there wasn’t any bullying or victimizing, just the occasional arguments.

I was the baby of the family and I bullied my older sister… I don’t think she hates me :(

Just curious how old are you?

I’ve got a brother (5 years older) and a sister (3 years older), never had issues with them bullying me.

I’m the oldest, and I was never really much of a bully. I used to get mad and yell at my younger siblings, but for the most part we got along pretty well.

Is there anything you guys have in common that you could do together to form a stronger bond? Even something as simple as watching a TV show together every week could make him start to see you as a real person instead of as his little sister, and he will begin to respect you more and treat you better. And if all else fails, keep out of his hair for a while, till he grows up a bit more, and ask your parents to help you fend off his bullying. Teenagers can be incredibly dumb, but he’ll grow out of it eventually.

i have two brothers. one is 7 years older than me and the other is 5 years older. when we were younger they used to pick on me, but only jokingly. they took it a little far sometimes and i got upset but i would never hold it against them now, they were kids too.

I have three big brothers one, two, and three years older then me. The older two bullied me constantly throughout my teen years. They did some really mean awful things. One brother apologized very sincerely and I have forgiven him. The other is an arrogant jerk and I do my best to avoid speaking to him.

My brother is 9 years older than me and he bullied me some, but not much. One time while he was babysitting me, though, the phone rang and when he hung up he told me that it was our mother and she called to say that she didn’t love me and wasn’t ever coming home again. That was a bit traumatic. Fortunately she came home. :)

Once we were adults we were friends.