When given a loathsome gift by somebody you like what do you do?

Since this person is so sweet and loyal, maybe take her to lunch and tell her that something has been bothering you and you don’t want her feelings to be hurt, then explain. Tell her that you understand that it’s a great gift, but it’s just not your taste. Be sure to let her know that you appreciate it, and if she wants to take it back, then maybe you two can use the money for a night out on the town together instead.

Get rid of it, but tell her someone came into your house that absolutely loved it, and as a favor your passed it on to her.

@YARNLADY actually the item is quite juvenile/childish and I have been waiting for a little girl to come a long and say “I want that fairy, mummy can I have one, please, please ?” To which I would reply “OK darling, just because you love it so much…” Unfortunately that has not happened and I guess if I’m honest I would be more comfortable with that than just tossing it out and saying that somebody loved it and I gave it to them.

@ubersiren Without going into details, it would be impossible for me to do what you have suggested, although it sounds like a mighty fine idea. What a great way to prepare somebody you are about to disappoint. It must be really disappointing to specially choose something for somebody and find that they do not like it. Having said that, in this case I do not know how somebody could have got it so wrong!

I would say “thank you.”

watch this and laugh instead :]

You could try, “this doesn’t fit with my decor, but if you would consider a (what you would like) maybe we could trade.”

I have a friend that takes little troll dolls and she knits clothes for them, and has dozens of them in outfits and such. I think it is a goofy thing to do, but it gives her pleasure to give them as gifts. She has given me several. I accept them with a smile, and tell her thank you. They usually end up in a drawer or a box somewhere in the attic. I have never gotten rid of them because although I don’t really have a fondness for them, I do have a fondness for the person that gave them to me.

I have accepted innappropriate gifts from people, and done so graciously, because isn’t it the the thought that counts?

I might appear to be many things, but appearing to be unappreciative of the gift someone took the time to give me is just rude. @The_Compassionate_Heretic has it correct. Just say thank you.

Well unless she gave you a blue and silver paisley couch, I hardly think a small gift is going to screw up your decor that much.

Put it away, donate it, whatever. Thank her for thinking of you, not necessarily for the gift.

@photographcrash I can so identify with that!

@evelynspetzebra please don’t get me wrong, I have been very gracious. And like you, while I do not like the gift I do like the person. I guess I am just hoping for a win/win solution. It probably doesn’t exist.

Leave the thing where it is and consult your “Higher Self.” Try to discover why it is so very important what people think of you.

I agree with @ubersiren

Whatever happened to just being grateful for the gift and the thought and gesture behind it? Sheez.

Is it breakable? I’m just saying that one day while rearranging your artifacts it could accidentally fall on the floor and shatter into a million little pieces. So many pieces that it couldn’t possibly be glued together.

@dkenneth, if one is truly bothered by something in their environment, it is a personal feeling and I’m not convinced it has anything to do with what others think of them. In my home I enjoy being surrounded by things I love and that make me comfortable. I don’t care one whit what others might think of them, as long as my house is clean and presentable that is all that matters. Everyone should be allowed to make their personal space their own comfort zone and it is ok not to have things around that make them uncomfortable.

@tb1570 the fact that the questioner is so concerned for the feelings of the giver shows that she is grateful for the gift and the thought behind it. If she wasn’t, she would have given it back with a horrified look on her face, but instead she wants to go out of her way to keep from hurting this person’s feelings.

Being grateful and touched that someone gave you something does not mean that you have to display it in your home if it’s it bad taste. When you give someone a gift that serves no useful purpose other than decoration, you run the risk that the recipient will not find it as attractive as you do. Often these types of purchases are made from wanting to give the person “something” as a gesture of friendship. Thanking someone profusely for the thought and the friendship behind the gesture is really what’s important. The “thing” itself is immaterial.

I love the link from @photographcrash it’s soo true :)
I would display it in a spare room or in your downstairs loo!!

Is there a room in your house she rarely or never enters? Move it into there. When she asks about it, you can show her and say you thought it looked best in that room. If she doesn’t ask, I would find a way to bring it up. Then, after she has seen it, you can put it in a drawer somewhere since she wouldn’t be back in that room again to monitor it’s continued presence.

Of course, I am dying to know what it is.

Tell her your daughter loved it, so you gave it to her. And then wrap it up and give it to her!

I thought about this question when I was at the Goodwill this afternoon, where bad choice gifts seem to go when they die. I bought a really cool lamp for $8.

@Supermouse, break it? are you crazy?? the guilt would be enough to eat you alive (or it would me anyway).

I must think differently than most people. Years ago, when I was collecting zebra-themed things passionately, a very good friend gave me a mailbox that was made up to look like a zebra. This friend is notorious for searching high and low for that certain gift to express an individual’s tastes To think some guy was making money gluing bits of rope and wood to a standard sized mailbox so that they looked like animals astounds me I knew I had to display it prominently, so I put it out by the road as the official receptacle for my mail.

It stuck out like a sore thumb in a roomful of healthy fingers.

I got some ribbing about it, including a few remarks about how god-awful ugly it was, and it was damned ugly, and not even painted in a realistic manner the guy that made it must have only seen a zebra once, while he was drunk, and in passing but I put it up there for the world to see. It always gave my mailman a chuckle, but then, he could have just been laughing at my gullibility.

It stayed out there on the post until the tail and mane rotted off, and the friend that gave it to me remarked that it might be time to replace it. I asked him if he had something in mind, and he laughed and shook his head, saying, “Naw, I think you are due for a regular looking mailbox now.”

So I took the ugly frikken thing down and put up one that matches the color of my house, no legs, no mane, and no tail. Just an ordinary mailbox. I still have the battered old zebra mailbox, except it is in the corner of my garden shed, providing habitat for a large collection of spiders, cobwebs and dust.

@evelyns_pet_zebra I was raised Catholic so I know from guilt, but I am pretty sure I wouldn’t feel guilty about it being accidentally broken. lol4rl! I have been on the receiving end of many, many horrible gifts, I don’t think anything of returning things I won’t ever use or just don’t like. On the flip side, I would not have any trouble if someone returned, or even regifted, something I gave them.

@SuperMouse regifting is an honored tradition in our family, but we have to be careful not to regift to people who know the original gifter. That can be awkward. =)