Did I ruin my friend's faith in humanity?

There is only 1 person that matters, and that is you. If you live your life to please others you might as well go work for the local church, or become a social worker.
If you feel that this person does not add anything to your life, cut them loose. I know it sounds harsh, but you will enjoy your life better with this rule.

I don’t know. If you don’t see anything that you want to do with him in the long-run, then you must make your choice now.

I don’t. But, I also donmt want to be responsible for a suicide. I don’t have any reason to believe that is going to happen, but if it did I couldnt forgive myself.

Excusing the stereotype of social workers obliquely expressed by @desmodus, I am one, and I tell you that you are not responsible for any other person’s actions or feelings; you are only 50% of any relationship you’re in – no more, and no less.

This is only “a ploy to get [you] to drive out there every day” if you let it be.

Having said that, your former exercise buddy has clearly signaled to you that he’s (she’s?) lonely, and doesn’t have many friends. While you needn’t drive halfway across town to exercise with this person, if you like(d) him/her at all, you can extend your friendship in other, more low-key ways: a coffee together every once in a while, a movie – but only if you really feel like it, and want to become friends with this person.

No one ever really does another a favor by befriending them out of charity, as a “good deed”; in the end, that almost always backfires (in part because it carries a subtle connotation of condescension). Each of us is responsible for his or her own life – including social life….

Why would friends have to hang out everyday? Just because you can’t work out with him on a regular basis, doesn’t mean you have destroyed a friendship. If you still consider him a friend, just tell him you’ll hang out with him some other time in other ways. Much like @littlewesternwoman said, invite him next time you go out somewhere if you still want to.

It all really depends if you still want a friendship with this person. If you do, just explain to him your situation, and hang out whenever you’re free. I’m sure a friend would understand.

There is simply no reason why you should believe you are responsible for whatever this friend chooses to do. It is foolish to try and live your life in a way that satisfies everyone else around you, because a, you can never satisfy everyone because everyone is different, and b, you will never live for yourself.

Furthermore, if someone’s faith in mankind can be ruined by one friend not wanting to spend an hour a day commuting to hang out with them after they chose to move across town, that speaks volumes more about the weaknesses of that person versus any type of ill-intent from you.

Now it’s obvious that this friend valued the time you spent together. What about working together to find a solution, like meeting up once or twice a week in a gym or park that’s equidistant between the two of you? Or taking a class together? If you do believe in helping someone when they’re down, then take the steps to help instead of sitting here questioning whether you’ve ruined their faith in mankind or whether your denial will cause them to commit suicide.

Why doesn’t he just go work out where you’re going now, instead? I wouldn’t drive 30 just to work out, and doing so is a waste of gas.

@dee1313 I tried that he through a hissy fit. I guess everyones right, some people are just poison.

I am trying to do the noble thing here, but it appears that sometimes there is no such thing as a good choice.

Life goes on. :)

If he’s expecting it of you, and yet doesn’t want to reciprocate, then he’s not worth it anyway. The friendship obviously doesn’t mean that much.

If it takes a mild disappointment from only one person, his “faith in humanity” wasn’t that strong to begin with. I wouldn’t suggest you trouble yourself with it.

@mowens remember, no good deed goes unpunished. ~

I agree with @Phobia. Simply because it is inconvenient to work out every day, there are all sorts of levels of friendship. What about meeting once a week to work out together. Or you go there once a week, and he comes to your place once a week. if he is not willing to compromise too, then make it clear that is his choice.

No. Don’t let his problems be yours.

Some people click and some dont.

uhhh can we all chime in together here and spell out MANIPULATION

When you said that he “threw a hissy fit” when you suggested he be the one to do the driving to your neck of the woods, that spoke volumes.

If your friendship really means that much to him he would be delighted to maintain the friendship and drive up to you rather then DEMANDING (That’s what the hissy fit really is) that you be the one to go out of your way for him.

People who are users and manipulators are generally not the type to commit suicide. They just make everybody around them feel like doing it. What a supreme narcissist he is. You are far better off without him. Don’t let yourself get dragged down with Artificial guilt. You have already extended yourself by befriending him in spite of his elusive (read that as self-involved) nature.

Did you ever wonder why he says he does not have any other friends——I don’t. Obviously he never learned the truth of the old saying “If you want a friend, Be a friend” He doesn’t want to extend himself to you in any way. He wants you to do it all and when he doesn’t get his way he resorts to throwing a temper tantrum like a two year old. With friends like that who needs enemies. How supremely selfish.

You are better off without him throwing hissy fits and trying to lay guilt trips on you simply because you are not responding to his pulling your puppet strings.

Life has so much to enjoy. Hang out with friends who appreciate your thoughtful nature. This guy is a user.

i don’t think he’s ~omg manipulating!~ you. it sounds like he is lonely and clicked with you, and maybe thinks that your plan to not work out with him anymore is an excuse to not hang out with him at all.
maybe hang out with him once in awhile. you don’t have to commit every day to him, but does it hurt? i doubt it.