Do you think everyone has a definitive moment in their lives that forever alters them?

I believe that life is made up of a lot of these moments. We are forced so many times to choose which path we will go down.

I do believe everyone will have some moment that forever alters who they are as a person, and how they view the world, yes.

@mponochie – good god. I am so sorry for yo and your mother.

I have. But not in that way.

One forever changed the way I look at things and think. Opened up my creative thinking.

The other just happened when my wife surprised me by asking for a divorce.

Whether it is an earthshaking moment or small experiences that nudge you along, life itself will bring about change. It is up to us to decide how we react to those externalities and if we allow those changes to move us in positive directions.

I didn’t have a moment, but rather a time in my life: the first couple of years of college. That time period set the course of my life in a different direction completely and I’m still feeling the repercussions of that time.

Not necessarily everybody as a rule. But different moment carry more significance than others. There have been several defining moments in my life for sure.

Every time you make a decision it alters the rest of your life.

Our experiences make up who we are. Being abused psychologically and sexually in childhood certainly influenced me greatly. A lot of that was negative, and it took decades to overcome the ‘victim’ mindset. But the positive is that it has made me a very compassionate person.

It seems that there are those who get through life without experiences that are so traumatic as yours and mine; but still they have to face adversity and challenges in some ways, and those choices will impact their paths and perspectives.

No, but I think some people do. Such turning points are the stuff of literature and drama.

I think some do.

A majority of us, however, are faced with a series of lesser events in succession.

that’s why so many of us fail to accomplish our full potential, because if we’re not being slapped in the face with a monumental occurrences, we often times do not realize the importance of an occurrence. Humanity needs trial, needs hardship, in order to flourish.

I am truly sorry about your mother’s experience, and yes, I believe everyone has an epiphany from time-to-time, molding how they live their lives. If we didn’t have these learning experiences, we’d be mudslinging apes.

Not unless you count the act of being shoved out into the world from the womb, birth. Many people have one major event they remember, most have several events over time that shape them, some live on a more even keel.

Along with others here I think it depends on the individual and on the stimulus. Some people look for clues and change with the information as they go along, some people don’t look.

Then there is what you are describing, a Significant Emotional Event. An emotional tsunami where the landscape is irrevocably reversed and marked with an ‘undoable’ knowledge. It doesn’t matter whether you want this change or not, it occurs.

I don’t think everyone has a SEE in their life, but I do believe we all have a defining moment when we decide to be who we are. How significant that is depends on the individual.

AC

How could I forget the birth of my kids. I realized at that point what I was here for from that day on!!!!!!

I tend not to see things as definitive. My life is not that dramatic—or the drama happens over an extended period of time. I just went through a year or so where I experienced mental illness for the first time rather late in life. You’d think I might feel that to be a definitive experience. However, while it certainly changed me, I don’t see it that way. It is just another passage of the many I’ve experienced.

I’ve been unemployed three times. I’ve had to deal with infertility. Infidelity. Mental illness. I’ve had serious self-doubt many times in my life. In fact, I’ve never really felt good about myself. I’ve had to deal with parental disapproval most of my life (or, at least, that’s how I interpret lack of approval).

Any of these things might be seen as definitive, but the longer I live, the less important they become in comparison to all else that I have experienced. I don’t have explosive crashes any more. I’m just a slow-moving train wreck.

Are there people that have significant experiences or moments that forever change the course of there life? Sure but not everyone. I suspect that most people live their lives with a narrow range of events and experiences. I know people that have never been out of the county where they were born. They know nothing about current events and little history yet they raised children that went on to do wonderful and interesting things.

The point is that you don’t need a “life changing event” to guide your life. What you need is a loving family and support to get you off to a healthy productive life. Not everyone needs drama in their life; some are perfectly content with their current circumstance.