How does one get rid of being socially awkward?

just go with the flow.

Editted: Instead of trying to overcome social awkwardness, let go of being conscious of being awkward. If you’re always worried about being weird around people, you make yourself awkward. Just don’t worry about it so much.

What sort of awkwardness? Like, what situations and in what way?

I think it’s important to remember that many people feel awkward sometimes.

removed by me.

You mean, I think, “How do I become less socially self-conscious? You do it gradually and keep in mind at all times that most people are socially awkward, particularly when they are young.

Often you can ask someone a question about him or herself and then simply listen. Or pretend that you are in a room with only the one person you are chatting with. Or role-play with a friend.

I’ve been socially awkward most of my life and only recently have begun to work it. Most of people who are socially awkward are experiencing some sort of self-consciousness. I, for instance, tend to think entirely much about what I’m going to say and how it’s going to come across before I say it. Because of this, I either render myself speechless, or when I do speak, it’s a muddle of incoherent words. So obviously, to combat that, like @wenn said, I just try to go with the flow and take myself out of my head. A few gin & tonics help too.

You accept it, make a joke about it, move on.

Move on being the big thing in that sentence.

I have dealt with social anxiety my entire life and it has only started getting better during the past few years. Over time I just started caring less about what people think of me. I still over think what I’m going to say and, like @perplexism, things come out in a jumble sometimes but it doesn’t make me feel like and idiot for the rest of the day like it used to. I hate to say it, but for me it was practice… and I’m sure the medication for generalized anxiety helped.

Rachael?

(sorry, my friend asks me this all the time)

but yeah, just kinda do the whole mental talk up thing… and if all else fails, jusat say to hell with it and dive in without looking back.

Thank you everyone for your responses. They were very helpful to me. As I write this, I find myself being conscious of the language I’m using but I’m going forget about it! I know now I just need to be less self conscious and just let myself go and be messy!

@profe55ional Good for you. :) Don’t forget to be able to laugh at yourself. People like people who can laugh at their awkwardness.

I just thought of something – I don’t know if it applies to you or will be helpful at all, but… you know how people say you should be comfortable doing something because everyone there is your friend? Well, to me that was worse! If I screw up, I still had to face those people all of the time. The idea mortified me. Try practicing coming out of your shell when you are out on your own or just with one or two understanding friends. It is kind of freeing when you know you won’t see those people again.

Yes, @Likeradar! Being able to laugh at yourself is so important! :)

When it comes down to it, you are who you are, and you can’t always be worried about making a good impression.

Allow others room to express their own unique qualities, accept them as they are and extend to yourself the same courtesy even if you feel out of place. You probably will continue to feel awkward even doing this but gradually you will be less self conscious. If you do it consistently people will have no choice but to accept you. Those who don’t accept you are probably exhibiting the same insecurities you would leave behind anyway. Soon you’ll sense the room better and be more skilled. Be brave.

Not such an informative response, but whoever you are, I’m sure your awesome. Really. Just remember that.

@profe55ional @holden @Gunter

Welcome to Fluther!

Practice.

A big thing to remember is that you are an interesting person with experiences and ideas and things to say that no one else in the room has. Not sure how to go about being interesting? Hang out with a crowd you can be interesting in. Example: I’m not the kind of person who normally hangs out with the gamer crowd in that I have a vagina so when I’m with gamers, I’m pretty damn interesting. Playing card games and video games has really boosted my confidence. Try something like that. Do you write poetry? Take a bunch of friends to an open mic night. Good at a sport? Take a class with a bunch of beginners who willed be awed by how talented you are. It’s playing dirty just a little bit, but it will help boost your confidence which will shine through in other social situations. Good luck!

If people are unable to accept you at your worst, then they dont deserve you at your best… this is a motto that i run through my head whenever i start to doubt myself.
it works everytime!

@profe55ional: if at all possible, get a mentor. that could include relations.

i prefer quirky. accept your “awkwardness” it is part of you

@gottamakeart: That is actually an excellent piece of advice. In high school, I was uncool and unpopular. Now, I am considered pretty cool and am pretty popular but not in a petty awful way and there are a lot of things about me that people thought were just weird in high school that people love now. Go with you quirkiness!

My answer above may have not seemed to approach the issue by focusing on another but that is exactly what one needs when they are self conscious. Change the focus away from self and it takes the pressure off. Continue to focus on the feelings and one can have a nervous breakdown. As I mentioned and gottamakeart echoed, accept yourself and your uniqueness. Yet, it is not always so easy to see when applied to self. But, it is apparent when one is not accepting others’ quirkiness, or conservativeness, or whatever. And when you can do that consistently you just continue to act as if the rules apply to you also until it’s habit.

In other words, let your freak flag fly!

Ok simmer down. :)

One of the first steps is not claiming for oneself any characteristic you dislike, ie. stop calling oneself “socially awkward”.

”I” statements are very powerful. Anything (words, statements, ideas) associated with “I” statements have the effect of manifesting or making real whatever the association entails. So it is inperative that one refrains from associating anything negative, or anything you do not want to see manifest in your reality with the word “I”.

Required reading:

As A Man Thinketh: by James Allen
(complete online text)