What would you do if you just found out your neighbor is a sex offender?
…or soon-to-be neighbor. He’s your neighbor so you can’t avoid him perpetually and you’re totally creeped out.
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115 Answers
Well, I would definitely be keeping an eye out for the neighborhood kids! Child pervs make me so uuugh!
But I’d try not to make too many assumptions unless I knew the actual situation. I know a guy who dated/slept with a 16 yr old when he was 18. He had started dating her when they were younger. Her parents didn’t approve and pressed charges. He is now on the sexual offenders list for life even though they are now married and have kids. Sad story.
For one. The kids would not be going to that side of the house.
I would keep my distance. Sorry sex offender. Too many other things in my life I have to contend with.
why would i be afraid of an in-public-urinator?
seriously, the judges apply the term “sex offender” far too broadly to be a valid indicator of danger.
could be a public urinator
could be someone who likes running around naked in public
could be someone who had sex with his 17 year old girlfriend when he was 18
unless he is an actual rapist (and by rapist I mean someone who actually forced someone else to have sex with him/her, like with force, threat or drugs), I would feel sorry for him and in fact try to socialise with him, since the stigma “sex offender” would pretty much be the death sentence for his social life, especially with all these sex-offender-database-websites, that tell you where they live
I’d say, time to buy a home security system.
He’d move out quickly in my neighborhood (I know because one did something in a home a few away from mine…he moved quickly! They don’t last for long in my village)
Someone was living in my neighborhood who went to prison for attempted murder. There isn’t a lot you can do, but practice caution.
There are hundreds of sex offenders within ten or twenty blocks of me. It’s a fact of life. Although, you should understand that anyone caught peeing outside a pub is a sex offender.
@daloon So are 19 yr olds that have sex with 17yr olds ;(
@daloon Yikes! That’s quite a few.
For the neighbor, let’s assume he wasn’t just publicly peeing or having consensual sex :(
Would you all feel different if it was a woman instead of a man?
@SpatzieLover I think its absolutly disgusting that some 50 year old man can have sex with a 20 year old and its ok, but a 20 year old and a 16 year old is illegal.
@hookecho I’m with you. I think it’s terribly unfortunate to ruin a young kid’s life with such a title attached to his name & record
keep in mind that sex offender does not equal pedophile.
This sex offender apparently does = pedophile. More specifically child pornography.
Well that changes things and would have been helpful if you included it in your question.
I would probably move.
@inkvisitor I’d invest in a fence and/or very dense evergreen landscape
@johnpowell I wanted to know peoples’ responses to ‘sex offenders’ in general, too.
@inkvisitor
as long as he has his urges under control and keeps it in the realm of fantasy, s/he would not have any problems with me.
We live too close to schools for a sex offender to be our neighbor. :)
However, if that wasn’t the case and I knew for a fact that a sex offender whose offense involved children and/or violence, I would get a large dog and have a long talk with my children. I would probably stop letting them play in the yard alone, and that would be very sad.
I’d be tempted to have my husband approach the person to make it clear we know about his or her past and won’t go out of our way to make the individual uncomfortable as long as he or she stays far away from me and the kids. Anything suspicious and we’d call the cops immediately.
@mramsey I also know a kid (well, this was 12 years ago so he’s not a kid anymore) who had that exact same thing happen to him. Great kid, lived right next door to us, and is now on the sex offender registry. I felt so bad for him.
My question would be if he was a real sex offender, i.e. child porn, rapist etc., instead of some guy who got a dirty picture from his old girlfriend when he was 19 and she was 17.
@Sabotage82 Yeah, don’t know the details on the conviction.
@MissAusten There is a school nearby. Offenders in Texas do not have restrictions on where they live – only paroled offenders have to obey the “Child Safety Zone” -
Paroled sex offenders are not allowed to be within 500 feet of any place where children are known to congregate. This is known as a “Child Safety Zone.” Offenders who are placed on probation also may be ordered by a judge to avoid children, but once the offender has completed their sentence, there are no regulations preventing them from being around children.
In urban areas, it is impossible to keep sex offenders away from schools. Or away from living near you. I just checked. There are 98 in my zip code alone. A random sample of them showed that most seemed to be within ten blocks of me, and one was just around the corner. That’s life in the city. But as I said, I have no idea what kind of sex offender they are. Indecent exposure? Statutory rape? Public urination? Rape? Pedophilia? Child porn?
It really is a broad sweeping term. It should be elaborated greatly.
I don’t have much to do with my neighbours and hardly ever see them so I doubt it would affect me too much. However, I would worry about the five other people, four of whom are children, that live with them.
I’d find out what he or she did to become a sex offender.
Unless s/he has a nasty habit of breaking into a house full of adult males and taking advantage of them, I’m fine.
Also as you say in the OP He’s your neighbor so you can’t avoid him perpetually.
In the 2 (and a half) months I’ve lived here, I have not once talked to any of my neighbors (and I’m in quite a well-populated suburban street). In the 5 years I lived at my previous house (In a very rural area) I only knew one of my neighbors, because we carpooled to school for a year.
and then before that, in the surburban area I lived for 7 years, on a street with 27 houses according to google maps, I knew the people in 10 of the houses, and the kids in 8 of those were my friends
It’s incredibly easy to avoid neighbors.
I might stop having sex with her, or at least start using a condom.
@inkvisitor “This sex offender apparently does = pedophile. More specifically child pornography.”—Oh no. Do you have children????
@inkvisitor you said: He’s your neighbor so you can’t avoid him perpetually
Why not? Who says you have to have anything to do with him, or anyone else in your neighborhood for that matter? You most certainly can avoid/ignore him, and if you are asked, you can say why. If it were me, I would do the research through my local law enforcement agency, make sure you have your facts straight, then tell all the other neighbors, so they too can keep an eye on their children.
Someone in my family was a victim of one of those creeps, and every timeI I get a notice that he has moved, I send the FDLE (Florida Department of law Enforcement )
flyer to all his surrounding neighbors. Let’s just say that I spend a lot on postage, because he never lives anywhere for long. hopefully in your case, the same will happen.
if your neighbors know, and he isn’t comfortable, he may decide to move soon.
@scamp Thanks for taking the time and initiative to keep fellow citizens informed and safe!
@Val123 No children to worry about.
@scamp and @Sarcasm True enough, and avoidance is what’s going to happen. I’m not a very social person anyhow. I thought about sending off for the records, but something in me doesn’t want to know the porn details.
That’s good news. Srsly, I guess I’d start talking to the neighbors. Like many have said, if he gets uncomfortable enough, maybe he’ll move. Maybe do something subtle like…..put a huge neon sign in your front yard telling a few people about the neighbor! :)
@Val123
Rest assured, I would be the first to demolish that sign, to hell with property damage.
There is a limit to how much one can deserve to be constantly antagonised, and that limit is usually reached with the sentence and punishment decided by the judge.
Why not make him wear a yellow armband with a david star on it?
@ragingloli It was a joke, but I think the neighbors need to be advised. Did you read where this wasn’t an innocent thing, like sex between an 18 year old and a 17 year old? It was about child pornography. The sentence may end, but I’ll bet the urges on the part of the pedophile don’t, and people need to know.
@mramsey I don’t want anyone else to fall victim to this scuzzy moron, and as long as my loved one has to live with what he did, so does he!
@inkvisitor Your local law enforcement agency should have a sex offendr/predator list. It shows the offenders’ charges and their prison records, not the details of what they did. I think before you do or don’t do anything, you should check your imformation to make sure it is true. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to shun an innocent man because of a neighborhood rumor.
In Florida, the law says that you can print the offender’s flyer and post it anywhere you want, as long as you post the entire flyer with no markings or changes added to it. if you find out what you think is true, you can distribute copies to your other neighbors to warn them.
@scamp Same rules apply here in Wis. You can pass out flyers to all schools, at bus stops-etc.
@scamp I found out in the first place through the Texas DPS – I haven’t even moved to the neighborhood yet.
Oh.. so you are the one moving into the neighborhood, not the offender? I misunderstood. I thought the offender was moving into your neighborhood. If it makes you that uncomfortable, can you find a different neighborhood to move to? Do you know if this guy is a repeat offender? How long ago was he charged/convicted? Can you ask the other neighbors if he behaves himself? Oh man.. I wouldn’t want to be in your shoes!
@SpatzieLover when this first happened, I plastered the flyer in every storefront, and put one in every mailbox in my town. He won’t come anywhere near our town again. there are a lot of Daddies, and big brothers, and Uncles that would love to get ahold of him!!
I’d find out what it was for, first. But if it was a person who’d actually harmed a child, I don’t know. Even people who do bad things deserve compassion, but I’d give him or her a wide berth if I had children around. That might upset them, but one has to live with the consequences of one’s actions.
@ragingloli Rest assured, I would be the first to demolish that sign, to hell with property damage.There is a limit to how much one can deserve to be constantly antagonised, and that limit is usually reached with the sentence and punishment decided by the judge.Why not make him wear a yellow armband with a david star on it?
GA
@aprilsimnel that sounds good , but compassion for that monster was the very last thing on my mind when I had to hold her after a nightmare because she thought he was climbing in her window late at night. Or when I had to put multiple deadbolts on the bathroom door, and stand outside it while she showered because she was afraid he would ‘get her” in there.
I wonder how much compassion he deserves, now or ever? How much compassion did he show her when he pinned her down and raped her? I tend to agree more with your last statement when you said: one has to live with the consequences of one’s actions.
I will make sure he lives with the consequences of his actions just as long as she does.
A sex offender means nothing under current broad legal criteria. If the person was a child molester, I would make him want to move – soon. If it was a female child molester I would ignore the issue – they tend to engage in a voluntary but illegal relationship with young guys. (I have personal experience in that area – I got lucky when I was young.)
Research. If I felt in no danger, I’d do nothing. If the person was nice and polite, I’d be as well. Everyone deserves a chance at redemption.
@scamp Awesome work! I’d hate for my child to become someone’s prey, especially if I knew the predator lived near me.
There was a wealthy very wealthy man that molested a girl when she came with her parents to his family indoor pool party. She was too afraid to tell her parents right away. She told her grandma a week later. Grandma took her to the police station, and the molester was arrested nearly instantaneously (we live on one side of the cop shop & ironically he lives on the other).
There was no need to post flyers. He was blacklisted by our community. But, here’s the KICKER…he’s wealthy, so he plead out on different charges and has no permanent record of the molestation on his criminal record. I hate the loopholes of our justice system!
I’m sure I don’t need to point out to all you intelligent Jellies that the most dangerous sex offenders are the ones who haven’t been caught. It’s all well and good to know where the registered offenders live/work, but it’s just as important if not more so to educate children about how to stay safe. Make sure they feel completely accepted and loved at home so they don’t become easier targets for people who may prey on their need for attention and affection. There’s no way to be with you children 24/7 and know every single person they come into contact with, so give them the tools they need to protect themselves or, worst case, feel able to talk to you about anything that does happen.
While I feel that child pornography is reprehensible, does looking at pictures make you a molester?
I would fart in his mouth.
It was possession with intent to promote which means three or more copies (of however many things).
I would obviously keep a better eye on my kids if a sex offender moved into my neighborhood but I wouldn’t do anything drastic, like move away. Sex offenders are everywhere and they all have many different reasons they’ve received that unfortunate branding. I wouldn’t assume the worst. I would hope it was for something silly (like peeing in public).
I’m curious if people who have child porn on their computers are sexually aroused by their own children. I didn’t know it’s illegal for people to look at pictures unless they were trying to solicit kids. There are some realms of the world I don’t look into.
@hungryhungryhortence I’m curious if people who have child porn on their computers are sexually aroused by their own children.
Pedophilia and incest shouldn’t be seen as linked.
I’m sure there are plenty of men (or women!) who have (adult) porn and adult children, but aren’t necessarily attracted to their kids.
I’ve got porn with adult, skinny, dark-haired women, but I’m not attracted to my sister.
@Sarcasm, and possession of porn does not make you more of a potential rapist than the average man, either.
@inkvisitor, the possession with the intent to promote means that he’s running it as a distribution business. Here’s a link to a definition of what constitutes intent to promote.
Child pornorgraphy is photos of anyone under the age of 18. There was a lot of controversy last year around sexting, which is teenage girls sending text messages with nude photos of themselves to boys in their high school. Under the law, they, or their parents, could be charged with trafficking in child pornography. An 18 year old boy who received such a photo from a 16 year old girl and sent it on to his friends to see is trafficking in child pornography. The 16 year old girl who texts naked pictures of herself is trafficking in child pornography.
It’s not always dirty old men looking at pictures of 10 year olds, or taking pictures of 10 year olds. It could be 16 year old girls sending pictures to an 18 year old boy on a cell phone, and he forwards it to friends. Or it could be a parent whose teen has a collection of nude photos of teenage girls on a family computer, and the teen has been sending them to other people via the internet.
I cannot believe I’m mounting what could be as a defense for this. “Child pornography” is a hot button in communities, but it’s really wrong to vilify a person without getting all of the details of the circumstances, and that’s not always clear in what the charges read.
Thanks all for the responses. Like I have mentioned, I do not know the details of the conviction but something in my head won’t let go of it even if it is with “an older minor.” Regardless, did he not know it was illegal? Whether or not some think pushing an age set for adulthood is near is admissible, it is still widely known as being illegal and still creepy to me. If he for some reason had no clue about the law, ignorance is no excuse (and he was almost 30 when it happened).
So what happens if you WOULD see the said neighbor? What would people do? Act cordial, etc.? Keep to yourself? Certainly it is not plausible that he can be avoided forever.
@hungryhungryhortence
@Sarcasm
@PandoraBoxx
Actually they have linked those who watch child porn as more likely to commit sex crimes against children. It is a completely different phenomenon than adult porn. And yes it is illegal to look at child porn even if you don’t solicit it or act upon your ‘desires’. It also suggests that the large majority of people who have child pornography do have small children which is an odd coincidence but it does not report on incest itself.
Download this report from the following link and look at page vii (executive summary) which summarizes what I have said above. This is not spam or anything related to porn other than a report on it.
Child Porn Report: National Survey of Law Enforcement
@RedPowerLady: Thank you, I do see it as completely different than adult porn but I didn’t know it was illegal to even view it. What that tells me is the person who goes out of their way to take the chance of being caught with it, caught viewing it has some seriously dangerous issues.
Sexting 20% of teens have sent or posted nude photos of themselves.
Just something I noticed today that I missed before…
Went by there today to meet a fence guy so he could get some measurements (planned on installing a wooden fence anyhow since the chain link one is crappy) and noticed a little kiddie slide in the neighbor’s backyard. Not that it means anything, but yeah.
@inkvisitor Not that it means anything, but yeah.
I feel that you were trying to say something, but all I got was a negative impression about you. I am in my fifties and have children’s “attractions” in my yard. Hint: I have grand kids. Too young to use them yet, but I am paving the way. Building and purchasing things that I expect them to like. My wife does something similar by buying every toy that catches her eye – even if they are for eight to ten year olds. (Her grandson’s age is still counted in months,)
A paedophile would be unlikely to draw attention with a public display of a children’s attraction.)
@DarkScribe No, I wouldn’t read in to it deeply. I think I have adequately conveyed that I am creeped out about moving in next to someone who went to prison for something involved with child pornography. I also mentioned that I don’t know what exactly he did but at this point it doesn’t matter – I am moving there, he will be there, and I will be a civil neighbor.
I am not surprised by anything anymore so your comment about what a pedophile would do is neither here nor there for me. I was just sharing my reaction to what I saw.
So feel away and relate what your backyard looks like and what your family does. That’s fine. It really doesn’t matter. And neither does your impression of me.
@inkvisitor No, I wouldn’t read in to it deeply.
Exactly – I am not reading anything into it. With that comment about his yard you give an impression of being a little too willing to jump to conclusions. If he is a registered sex offender he will be subject to close legal scrutiny – so a child’s slide doesn’t really add up to anything sinister.
Are you sure you have the right guy if his address has not yet changed? Was the offense against a child, or peeing in public in an alley somewhere? You say that you have no idea as to the offense, so how have you ascertained that you have the right offender and not just someone with a similar name?
It is all way to vague and circumstantial to have a real response to it.
I am merely creeped out. End of story.
He lives in and owns the house.
@DarkScribe OK, I also have kid stuff in my yard and in my house for my grandkids, but I am NOT a sex offender! I think that little distinction makes all the difference in the world. There is a difference between me and you having that stuff, and a single man, convicted of possessing child pornography, who has kid attractions in the yard. HUGE difference.
@inkvisitor Totally creeps me out too.
@Val123 There is a difference between me and you having that stuff, and a single man, convicted of possessing child pornography
Where did this information come from? I though that the OP had no details regarding the conviction?
Regardless, I work on a logical basis. A registered sex offender is under constant close scrutiny and a child’s slide in the yard of a singe male offender would be a red flag likely to bring down a world of trouble on him. It doesn’t add up.
Yes, the charge was possession with intent to promote (three or more copies of x amount of material).
I don’t have details of ages, amount, how, and so on.
@DarkScribe If you didn’t notice what @inkvisitor said, it was “It was possession with intent to promote which means three or more copies (of however many things).” of child pornography! So I think it is safe to say that a child’s slide in this guy’s backyard IS something a little more than creepy.
@eonblue inkvisitor said, it was “It was possession with intent to promote
I did see that, but he also said that he had no details regarding the conviction. Possession of what? Sex offences are not related only to paedophillia. Many things are prohibited – sexual violence, rape, bestiality, incest – all depending on local law. Any conviction for these things could result in being labeled a sex offender.
@DarkScribe possession with intent to promote child pornography I believe is what was said above. Yes, I am sure we are all aware that sex “offences” [sic] are not only related to pedophilia.
Earlier @inkvisitor This sex offender apparently does = pedophile. More specifically child pornography.
I’ll just cut and paste the TDPS description:
TX:37040002 POSS W/INT TO PROMOTE CHILD PORNOGRAPHY
Again, I do not know the ages of the involved or what exactly…was done.
The Texas Penal Code describes it in this way:
(e)(1) the person knowingly or intentionally promotes or possesses with intent to promote material described by Subsection (a)(1); and (2) the person knows that the material depicts the child as described by Subsection (a)(1).
and
(a)(1) the person knowingly or intentionally possesses visual material that visually depicts a child younger than 18 years of age at the time the image of the child was made who is engaging in sexual conduct
An offense under Subsection (e) is a felony of the second degree.
@inkvisitor This sex offender apparently does = pedophile. More specifically child pornography.
Fair enough – you left that bit out before. In that case a kid’s slide in his yard – unless he has kids of his own and is not a single male – should raise some official eyebrows.
If I had a known paedophile – not just someone who thought that a sixteen year old who they met in a bar was nineteen, I would see to it that they decided to move. I wouldn’t feel comfortable having kids in my yard in view of such a person.
I left it out in the very beginning because I wanted to read about others’ general experiences with neighbors. I added that detail soon after – my second response in this thread.
My first reaction, before you posted the details is, “Ya! Is it a poor 18 year old who had sex with a 16 year old?” But when the fact that it involved child pornography came out, it put everything in a whole new light. I’‘m SO glad you don’t have any kids! And I’d sure flag any neighbors that do.
@inkvisitor
that could also inlcude nude pictures of his 17 yr old girlfriend, or even baby pictures of his niece. the application of the term “child pornography” is so broad that it includes trivial circumstances and as such the given information is less than sufficient to arrive at an accurate and just judgement.
there was a recent case where a mother who had pictures of her breastfeeding her baby was charged with production of child pornography.
@DarkScribe
If I had a known paedophile [...] I would see to it that they decided to move.
would you do the same to someone who had rape phantasies?
@ragingloli would you do the same to someone who had rape phantasies?
Aside from the impossibility of me knowing about another person’s phantasy, why would I? They have not done anything harmful.
They have not done anything harmful.
Neither have most paedophiles. You make the same mistake like most people of equating paedophiles with child molesters and child porn collectors.
Aside from the impossibility of me knowing about another person’s phantasy, why would I?
Yes why would you. But then again, why do you single out one group to declare as “fair game”?
Would you do the same to someone who is know to have fantasies about sex with animals and you had a dog?
Aside from the impossibility of me knowing about another person’s phantasy
Maybe he talked about it with his friends who then told other people and which then spread around town?
@ragingloli True, I have mentioned that I do not know the details – I may just get the damn report, but a part of me wants to just leave it behind.
I do know that he was 33 years old when it happened so maybe he would have been charged with something else had it been someone he was in a relationship with. I’m not sure.
@inkvisitor
you know, a 32 year old having the hots for a busty 16 or 17 year old girl at the peak of her desirability and fertility is not a pedophile. it is normal. what is not normal is societies arbitrary classification mechanism (that has by the way changed considerably since 100 years ago)
one time it was normal for 14 year olds to be considered adult and to get married.
@ragingloli I am not opining on it, just stating what facts I know about him. I do know his age, I do not know if he had “the hots” for a 16 or 17 year old (but made copies of law-determined pornography of her/him).
@ragingloli I’ll re-post my response way above in response to this statement:
You make the same mistake like most people of equating paedophiles with child molesters and child porn collectors
Actually they have linked those who watch child porn as more likely to commit sex crimes against children. It is a completely different phenomenon than adult porn. And yes it is illegal to look at child porn even if you don’t solicit it or act upon your ‘desires’. It also suggests that the large majority of people who have child pornography do have small children which is an odd coincidence but it does not report on incest itself.
Download this report from the following link and look at page vii (executive summary) which summarizes what I have said above. This is not spam or anything related to porn other than a report on it.
Child Porn Report: National Survey of Law Enforcement
I’ll also add that you have a good point about some crimes being classified as child porn (ie breastfeeding) that are undeserving of the drastic title. However they are by far the outlier.
@RedPowerLady
while the ratio cp-possessors – child molesters is quite high (though there was not any comparison or any link to statistics about the relation of normal porn – rapists, i will assume for now that the former is higher) you also have to consider that someone who likes adults can simply go out, start a relationship and have sex, or go to a whorehouse, while a paedophile can’t.
Furthermore, the report considers every sexual conduct with children as a crime, which means it can not serve as a basis to say that child porn is more likely to lead to child rape than normal porn leads to normal rape.
It can not serve as a basis because the definition of “crime” in the pre-18 realm is different from the post-18 realm.
To be a basis for any meaningful comparison it should compare the number of non-consensual (e.g. forced) cases of either group (which it doesn’t).
if you compared the number of sexual conduct with children in relation to child porn possession with the number of sexual conduct with adults in relation to normal porn possessions, i am quite sure the post-18 group would not be anywhere close to 84% without any sexual conduct.
@ragingloli .
To be a basis for any meaningful comparison it should compare the number of non-consensual (e.g. forced) cases of either group (which it doesn’t).
How can child sex crimes be consensual??? Again considering the ones where the child is 17 and the adult is 18 as minimal and therefor we are talking about crimes against actual children.
Anyhow I am not comparing adult porn users to child porn users. The point I made was that child porn users are more likely to commit sex acts against children. I am making this point because you said: You make the same mistake like most people of equating paedophiles with child molesters and child porn collectors
It is not a mistake to equate pedophiles with child molestors and child porn collectors.
You seem to have gotten off topic comparing adult to child.
How can child sex crimes be consensual?
Man: you want to have sex?
Child: yes, please.
It is not a mistake to equate pedophiles with child molestors
Yes it is because not all paedophiles rape children or collect child porn.
It is like equating blacks with rapists and thieves.
And you can not conclude that possessing child porn makes one more likely to rape children because nowhere in this report did it compare paedophiles who don’t possess child porn and rape/don’t rape children to paedophiles who do possess it and rape/don’t rape children, because they did not even cover paedophiles who do not possess child porn.
Based on that report you can not make a claim that possessing child porn makes one more likely to rape children, because there is no comparison between non-possession rapes and possession rapes. That report offers no statistical basis for that claim.
@ragingloli You must be trolling because a child does not have the legal right to give consent, even if they say ‘yes’. Anyone who thinks so needs some more education on child development and a morality check.
@ragingloli Yes it is because not all pedophiles rape children or collect child porn.
Ah it is highly unlikely a pedophile will not act on his desires. I’m sure we can find evidence that supports this as well. In fact I’d post some but I am at work and won’t be doing any pedophile searches here.
Also your equation is completely illogical. A pedophile is someone who, by nature of the term, thinks about committing sex crimes against children.
You cannot be suggesting that a Black person is someone who, by nature of their skin color, thinks about raping and stealing.
@RedPowerLady
I am by no means trolling.
. A pedophile is someone who, by nature of the term, thinks about committing sex crimes against children.
You on the other hand, are.
A paedophile is not someone who thinks about committing sex crimes against children. It is like saying that everyone that is aroused by adults constantly thinks of raping them. That is utter idiocy, falsehood and demagogery. A paedophile is someone who is sexually aroused by them and does not include an inherent intent to rape them.
a child does not have the legal right to give consent
whether the consent given by a child is legally recognised is an entirely different shoe.
@ragingloli A paedophile is not someone who thinks about committing sex crimes against children. It is like saying that everyone that is aroused by adults constantly thinks of raping them. A paedophile is someone who is sexually aroused by them and does not include and inherent intent to rape them.
If we apply your logic then you are suggesting that adults who think about having sex with adults do not act on their desires?? How many adults do you know that do not have sex?? Pedophiles are aroused by children, they act on their desires moreso than they do not (as any adult who has sexual desires does). And any sexual act with a child is a sex crime.
whether the consent given by a child is legally recognized is an entirely different shoe
Actually it is not. How can a child have enough development of the mind to understand the consequences of saying yes to sex with an adult? The laws were put in place to protect children and not for any other reason. That does not mean that politicians don’t sometimes use those laws to get media attention or further their agendas but they are just mucking things up as usual.
So far your logic has been completely unfounded. Perhaps you should explain where you are coming from. You have said more than once that a sex act against a child is not always a crime. In fact it is. And you have also said more than once that a child can give consent to sex with an adult. In fact they cannot. Not legally. But also they are not developmentally able to do so.
@Val123 Thank you :)
@RedPowerLady Keep it up! As for me, I’ll call ‘em what I really think they are…sicko perverts that are in need of medication/psychiatrist intervention
You have said more than once that a sex act against a child is not always a crime.
I have not. I have differentiated actual rape from consensual events. Stop lying please.
If we apply your logic then you are suggesting that adults who think about having sex with adults do not act on their desires?? How many adults do you know that do not have sex??
How many do you know that would still have sex with adults even if it was illegal?
How many do you know that would still do it if they knew that it would be morally wrong and illegal?
What you are claiming is that most humans do not have the self-control to prevent them from doing illegal acts.
you have also said more than once that a child can give consent to sex with an adult. In fact they cannot. Not legally.
Thank you for stumbling over your own words. Not legally. All that means is that the law does not recognise the consent as such, just as the law does not recognise the consent of a drunk to a contract. The actual consent, the event of “yes please” still exists.
Pedophiles are aroused by children, they act on their desires moreso than they do not
Thank you again for lying.
Remember the report you posted? 84 percent of those who possessed CP did not act on their desires.
Pedophiles brains are not wired the same as normally functioning adult brains are.
I have differentiated actual rape from consensual events
Again there is no such differentiation when it comes to children. And if you cannot provide any further logic on the subject then there is no reason to continue discussing it.
How many do you know that would still have sex with adults even if it was illegal?
Probably every adult alive. Why don’t you ask it as a fluther question. I think that’ll prove my point.
Take the issue of gay rights as an example. There was a long period of time that if anyone was known to have sex with the same gender then they would be punished and even killed. Guess what? We still have people who have sex with the same gender and there are still hate crimes.
How many do you know that would still do it if they knew that it would be morally wrong and illegal?
Well for one there are pedophiles. Look at the stats. Pedophiles still act on their behaviors moreso than they do not.
The actual consent, the event of “yes please” still exists
No it doesn’t because as I also said, which you conveniently left out, a child is not developmentally able to give consent.
84 percent of those who possessed CP did not act on their desires
Quote from the article: “40% of arrested CP possessors were “dual offenders,” who sexually victimized children and possessed child pornography, with both crimes discovered in the same investigation.”
And these are just the ones that were discovered. I would guess that there are many more who were not. Either way 40% is nearly half and is a large enough number to be concerned over. In fact your 84% is a large enough number to be concerned over when discussing child safety.
@SpatzieLover Thank you :)
@ragingloli No, the actual “consent” from a child does not exist for good reason. Children do not have fully developed frontal lobes. They are unable to make this decision themselves. Period.
We have learned quite a lot since the times when “14yr olds” married. We now know that 14 year old brains are not yet fully developed. Thank goodness for civilization, education and scientific studies.
BTW-This appears to be going off topic from the original poster’s question
@SpatzieLover It’s very interesting to observe though!
I think @RedPowerLady made a good point. If a person is aroused by persons of the opposite sex who are their age, they WILL have sex at sometime! Pedophilia is like any other addiction. Eventually you want more and more and more. Eventually watching other people in pictures having the “real” fun will get “boring.”
@RedPowerLady
I guess I jumbled up the numbers somehere, thanks for correcting me. However, 40 percent is still a minority, so your ”Pedophiles still act on their behaviors moreso than they do not.” claim is still, factually, wrong especially since the report only covered those who possess child porn, and not the entire range.The report still does not include paedophiles who do not possess child pornography, which means your claim that Pedophiles still act on their behaviors moreso than they do not. is undisputably factually unfounded.
No it doesn’t because as I also said, which you conveniently left out, a child is not developmentally able to give consent.
I agree, most do not understand the repercussions of such activities and can not see the larger picture, so in that sense of “consent” they can not do it.
But even though they are not able to understand it, they are still very able to agree to the activities and not be opposed to it. In that sense of “consent”, the simple act of saying yes, they can.
We seem to be arguing around differing definitions of “consent”. I agree with your argument about your definition, but know that the one I was talking about is different from yours.
Take the issue of gay rights as an example. There was a long period of time that if anyone was known to have sex with the same gender then they would be punished and even killed.
Statistics please. How many homosexuals still had homosexual sex and how many supressed their urges and started relationships with the opposite gender instead?
@ragingloli I am willing to concede that at this point I do not have information to back up the following statement: Pedophiles still act on their behaviors moreso than they do not. However I will be changing that statement to “Nearly half of pedophiles are found to act on their desires which is a scary high number”.
About the claim that pedophiles act on their behaviors moreso than they do not. Like I said I could find info to back that up but I am at work. At the very least I am sure there is info similar to the above statement. That it occurs at alarming rates whether it is a majority or not, nearly half is scary enough. I also think I have provided enough anecdotal evidence to back this up. People simply do not refuse to act on sexual desires as adults who like adults. It is faulty to assume that those who like children refuse to act on their desires as a majority.
We seem to be arguing around differing definitions of “consent”. I agree with your argument about your definition, but know that the one I was talking about is different from yours.
I’m not arguing about different definitions of consent. There is simply no reasoning that exists that could convince me, the law, parents, or most of the world that a child can give consent for a sex activity with an adult. No matter what your definition of consent is. Not only that but I looked up the definition of consent. Two synonyms they used stuck out. To approve, to give permission. A child cannot do either of these in this circumstance by their lack of developmental ability.
Statistics please. How many homosexuals still had homosexual sex and how many supressed their urges and started relationships with the opposite gender instead?
Get real. I don’t need to provide statistics and I’m certainly not researching any sex related question at work. We know that there have been homosexuals having sex with same gender individuals since the beginning of time. I know about my own culture which is Indigenous North American and that has existed since before colonization. And yes there is information to support that. You are arguing again in numbers. The numbers are irrelevant. That fact remains the same. Some people do suppress their urges. Many do not. In the case of child sex crimes the relevance is among those who do not which as we now know occurs in alarming rates (at the very least among those who possess child porn).
@RedPowerLady
As for “where i am coming from”. I am sexually aroused by drawings of anthropomorphic animals. Sometimes even real animals if they are well built.
What you also have to know is that sex with animals is legal in Germany, but I still don’t go out to rape dogs.
What you are doing is marginalising and what is worse, demonising an entire group of humans based on a report that only covers a fraction of the entire group, so excuse me that I defend them.
However I will be changing that statement to “Nearly half of pecophiles are found to act on their desires which is a scary high number”.
Sorry, but that is still wrong. Again you ignored paedophiles who neither possess child pornography nor go out and have sex with children, but instead suppress their urges and try to live a normal life.
The numbers are irrelevant.
Excuse me? The numbers are essential to the wrongess or correctness of your claim that _ “Nearly half of pecophiles are found to act on their desires which is a scary high number”_ . Without numbers, your claim has even less footing than it has now.
I don’t need to provide statistics
If you want your claims to be even remotely credible, you definitely do.
It is faulty to assume that those who like children refuse to act on their desires as a majority.
So it is faulty to assume that the report you yourself used to backup your still false claim, does indeed contain accurate numbers? To remind you, the 60 percent of paedophiles who possess child porn and who do not act on their desires, are still, factually, the majority.
To approve, to give permission.
Actually, that is the version of consent that I used. Note that it does not contain “understanding of the act and the consequences thereof”.
Yours does, and is therefore different from To approve, to give permission.
Some people do suppress their urges. Many do not.
Correction:
Many people do suppress their urges whose acting out is illegal in their society. Some do not.
@ragingloli You are now at the point of arguing semantics which is likely to mean that our conversation is over. “nearly half of all those who possess child porn act on their desires which is a scary high number”. I do believe there is evidence to support the previous statement as well but you seem to be taking advantage of the fact that I can’t provide my research as I am at work.
Anyhow the argument began as me stating that it is not a large jump for the OP to assume that someone who has possessed child porn has or will act on their desires, according to research.
If you want your claims to be even remotely credible, you definitely do.
Umm… Nope. Not when we are talking about something that is widely acknowledged. You just want to take advantage of the fact I cannot do the research at this time. It is ridiculous. Do the research yourself. We all know that sex acts between same gendered people have occurred since forever. I don’t need to prove that to you. You just want to find a caveat to argue your point.
To remind you, the 60 percent of paedophiles who possess child porn and who do not act on their desires, are still, factually, the majority.
Actually the report does not say that 60 percent do not act on their desires. It says 40% were caught. That does not mean the other 60% were not acting on their desires, it means we have no information about them. How is that for arguing details? And in reference to this statement, once again, I was discussing anecdotal evidence in regards to the amount of adults who do not act on sexual desires as once again I’m not going to research the topic at work.
In this circumstance, you cannot give someone permission or approve of an act without understanding the consequences of the act. Simply saying “yes” is not an act of approval or permission. And the law agrees with me on this. It is tiring to argue this with you over and over. The law is on my side and well that is what counts, now isn’t it?
The research also seems to be on my side as I haven’t seen you provide any credible research in your favor while I have. You can argue that the ‘law doesn’t matter’ all you want but it certainly does. The law is what decides what consent means and they say that a child does have to be able to understand consequences to give consent and that they are not able to do so.
Ah here you go now all my majority statements, are in fact true. Hehe
(in relation to CP owners)
“We found 40% of the cases involving CP possession in the
N-JOV Study involved dual offenses of CP possession and child sexual
victimization detected in the course of the same investigation. All of these offenders
had identified child victims.An additional 15% both possessed CP and
attempted to sexually victimize children by soliciting undercover investigators
posing online as minors. When these cases of attempted child sexual victimization
are counted, 55% of the CP possessors were dual offenders”
I hearby reclaim the statement that the majority of CP users do act on their desires.
I therefore am encouraged to believe that my original statement is also true that the majority of pedophiles do act on their desires but I do not have evidence, other than anecdotal, to support this statement yet as I am at work.
Now semantics is nothing, haha And the numbers support me, haha
“The research also seems to be on my side”
The reasearch you provided did not support your claim that the majority of pedophiles are child molesters. It simply doesn’t, so you can not claim that the research is on your side.
Ah here you go now all my majority statements, are in fact true.
No. You know I get tired of you ignoring the fact that the report does ignore paedophiles who do not possess child porn.
Your “majority statements” were about the entirety of paedophiles. You can not claim that they are correct because the report you used does not cover the entirety of paedophiles.
I will concede that the slight majority of CP possessors are child molesters.
However your claim that the majority of paedophiles are child molesters remains unfounded.
The reasearch you provided did not support your claim that the majority of pedophiles are child molesters. It simply doesn’t, so you can not claim that the research is on your side.
Actually I think you will find that the research does support my claim, I just haven’t provided you with it.
And I don’t know what makes you think that if CP owners are molestors , pedophiles aren’t. But you are right that I have not provided you with any research on it as of yet.
You know I get tired of you ignoring the fact that the report does ignore paedophiles who do not possess child porn.
The report does not ignore this it is about CP users, not about pedophiles in general. But I can see how that is frustrating when you are trying to make a specific point. Why don’t you go research it real quick?
However your claim that the majority of paedophiles are child molesters remains unfounded.
How about I found it when I get off work?
I also want to make a point to your motivation. An attraction to animals is not the same as an attraction to child humans. Are you sexually aroused by anthropomorphic animals that are children???
What you are doing is marginalising and what is worse, demonising an entire group of humans based on a report that only covers a fraction of the entire group, so excuse me that I defend them.
I don’t see why anyone would want to defend someone who did the same. Now I am not personally a believer that all people who commit sex crimes are inherently bad. I have not once talked about their moral character. I’m simply talking about behavior and statistics.
This discussion really needs to be taken to a new thread. However, I’d like to point out that even if a pedophile who views child pornography has never directly harmed a child, he has nevertheless supported the harm of a child. The child in the pornography has already been harmed. The fact that there is a demand for such pornography directly impacts the supply of it.
When all pedophiles band together and collectively decide to stop viewing this crap, therefore drying up the supply side, I’ll be more sympathetic to their ‘plight’. Until then, viewers/collectors of CP deserve every bit of punishment and scorn that they get.
@RedPowerLady
Here is what I found:
Hall et al., 1995
Out of the 80 test subjects, “Twenty-six subjects (33%) exhibited sexual arousal to the child slides that equaled or exceeded their arousal to the adult slides.”
Also, “3 subjects (4%) admitted to engaging in sexual behavior with them.”
Which means that only about 12% of paedophiles actually act on their urges.
Furthermore, “all 80 subjects reported that they had engaged in sexual acts with adult women.”
This study supports my assertion that the vast majority of paedophiles do not act on their urges.
It also supports my assertion that the majority of paedophiles suppress their urges and lead normal, non-child-diddling lives and have relationships with adults.
@ragingloli First with your study which I did look at.
They are counting how many people openly admitted to engaging in sexual behavior with a minor. Now how many people do you think told the truth about that?
And I found evidence that men can control their arousal to such stimulus:http://cjb.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/5/4/343
Now the latter may not be a convincing argument but is interesting. The former is very convincing to me.
The article also states that those who were more aroused to adults were also more aroused to children which presents another limitation in the study. It may just be a general arousal factor and not an indicator of pedophilia.
———————-
Here is some research I found.
Fifty percent to 70% of pedophiles can be diagnosed as having another paraphilia, such as frotteurism, exhibitionism, voyeurism, or sadism.7,12,25 Pedophiles are approximately 2.5 times more likely to engage in physical contact with a child than simply voyeuristic or exhibitionistic activities.7 Typically, pedophiles engage in fondling and genital manipulation more than intercourse, with the exceptions occurring in cases of incest, of pedophiles with a preference for older children or adolescents, and when children are physically coerced.5–7
An estimated 88% of child molesters and 95% of molestations (one person, multiple acts) are committed by individuals who now or in the future will also meet criteria for pedophilia
Pedophilic child molesters on average commit 10 times more sexual acts against children than nonpedophilic child molesters.15
http://www.mayoclinicproceedings.com/content/82/4/457.full
@ragingloli They have not done anything harmful.
Neither have most paedophiles.
If they are KNOWN by others as paedophiles then that is extremely unlikely. If they are on an official warning list then they have done far more than have a phantasy.
Okay folks, I decided I wanted to know the real deal. I made an inquiry account with the TX DPS and did a paid search thinking I was going to get more details and it just came back with the SO registry.
Does anyone know where to search for the details? Is it public information? I searched the county criminal records as well and nothing came up.
@inkvisitor I’d give up the search if I were you. Whatever you find is not going to make you feel any better about the situation. Also there is no way the information will be actually useful other than to stress you out. Just watch your children closely.
Another suggestion is to just get to know the guy w/out your children present and with your husband/brother/girlfriend present.
Answer this question 
