Social Question
Can anyone relate to having an “over-active” and extremely vivid imagination to the point that it crosses into reality?
I have a very severe case of having a very vivid over-active imagination. I’m going to do my best to explain myself. Any and all questions to my question are welcome if you need more information or more detail in a certain area. Please take this very seriously, I’m completely mentally sound and have all my marbles. I have seen several specialists and they have no idea how to explain or treat this.
For as long as I can remember, I have suffered from nightmares. Now usually, a person would think that as someone gets older they will subside and calm down a bit, but that has not been the case with me. The dreams have actually evolved over the years and now I don’t have to be sleeping in order to feel the fear I would in my nightmares.
There are 5 “creatures” that my imagination has created. They did not come all at once and have all slowly developed over the years. They have also developed names for themselves. It’s almost as if there is a part of me that houses them that I am not in control of. They are just there, their names are attached to them, nothing I have chosen or made for them.
The “Fast One” was the first; “Gravity Deifier” second; “The Girl” third; “Him Tall” was fourth; and the fifth has just arrived a few months ago, I have no idea what it looks like and it has not found a name yet. I have drawn both the Fast One and Gravity Deifier for a few very close select people. They we’re described as hellish Tim Burton rejects, to “f**ked up” for anyone to see.
They all began in my dreams scaring me to the point I would be up for days on end, taking prescription medication just to numb it, waking up screaming or holding my breath. But then it started to shift.
It is to the point now; I see glimpses of them in the day. I know what they smell like, what they sound like. Every detail of their existence. They have all found their place in my home. The hallway, my bathroom, my closet, my ceiling and the fifth I believe under my bed.
The anxiety they/this has created has begun to affect my health. My heart to be exact. The doctors are not 100% sure what is wrong right now, it doesn’t seem to be anything to serious, but they are sure that it is escalating. More tests to come.
I have tried so many times to find another person who can relate to me, who I can talk to about this and know that they understand exactly what I’m going through.
I am VERY grateful for my boyfriend. He has stayed up with me countless nights, come to see me in the wee a.m. so I could sleep and even sat in the bathroom to keep me company while I showered.
I know that this is going to all seem completely crazy to most people, and trust me I have thought the same about myself a number of times. But you need to understand I’m a completely sane person with a “glitch” :D
Thanks in advance for any and all comments, questions and suggestions!
Much Love,
LB