If someone from another country/culture who is visiting the U.S. does not use deodorant, is there a polite way to tell them that is the custom in the U.S.?

Details, please. Is the person male or female, how old is s/he, and what is your relationship to him/her?

It’s not for me, I’m asking for someone else who is looking for advice about how to proceed. I’m interested in the general concept though – is there even a polite way to bring it up? This particular person is a middle-aged man who is a leader in his community but comes from a community in the developing world without indoor plumbing. It’s important to treat him with respect so it feels very awkward to bring it up, but I wonder if it’s doing him a disservice to not bring it up – it would be awful if people avoided him during his trip here because of it or treated him poorly because of it.

You could buy him a gift basket of ‘interesting’ specialty soaps, deoderant, shampoos, aftershave, bath pillow, loufa etc to ‘Pamper himself with for his long speaking tour’.

Be sure to insert enough ‘Boy I don’t know how you’re going to do all of this traveling. I never feel clean on the road- and boy howdy does a long bath help at the end of a grueling day” sort of comments.

Could backfire though depending on the person.

I don’t think there is a “polite” way to say this…your options range from slightly embarrassing to incredibly insulting. I think most people would just risk the stink.

That said, I think the relationship to the person is the crucial thing. If you are of the same gender, you can pass it off as a “from one guy/girl to another, here’s a great tip” kind of comment.

I like geriwing’s answer. And, on the other hand, in some ways it is another country with other values and thoughts about odors. How would be feel if the situation would be reversed? Some well meaning people giving us something we don’t normally use so we smell more like them? I really don’t know. It might be more important in having regular showers than having deoderant. And if deoderant is offered, please make it no smell—it might be offensive to him if it had an odor of its own. And how to talk to them about it? I don’t know—the best I can think is how would you want to be spoken to about such a subject. And then do that.

Tell them its the law and if they don’t wear it while they are here the feds will escort their ass to Guano Bay Cuba. Act like you don’t care but your governments does so lets not get waterboarded.

It might not work at all, even if you tell him directly.

I have a relative who was made fun of constantly for his BO by another relative. The guy who did the teasing even bought the smelly bastard some deodorant, which he used until it ran out, but never bothered to buy another one.

Some people are just set in their ways. Plus, people who grew up without deodorant are so used to body odors that they don’t even pick up on them the way we do.

It’s never what you say, it’s how you say it. Keep that in mind.
I’m sure your friend who’s visiting here would appreciate being told in the long run. If he or she is going to be amongst people talking then the last thing he or she should want is for Americans to only remember that the speaker stunk. Just tell them, but be delicate. Wish I lived near by. I’d do it for you. Offending the senses is never recommended, I can’t think of a place where it is…..

Are you sure it’s body odor? or is it something the person is using on his or her person (such as turmeric, just to name a spice) that is giving off a strong and unfamiliar aroma? It might be a mistake to assume that the person is not clean.

Just say “mon cher ami, let me introduce you to one of my country’s most cherished traditions”. Give him a bottle, take one, show him how to use it and congratulate him on his worldliness.

Keep screwing your nose up and checking the bottom of your shoes – then get some others to do the same. The person will eventually work it out.

No, unfortunately not.

Could you give him a list of “helpful cultural tips”? Things that he might not know about the United States that will help him to understand. In that list, include that most Americans are not used to certain body odors that others would not find offensive, and that a shower every other day and the use of anti-perspirant is considered appropriate.

Of course, I can’t think of what else to put on the list. I’ll come back to this if something comes to mind.

Try on me first. I’m from India, I don’t use any deodorants nor any make up or powder or cream.
Why do I need to use them? I keep myself clean; I don’t smell bad (if I had, I would have used one, and my friends would have told me), if I do, I take another bath.

@Jeruba Are you sure it’s body odor? lol ;)

@occ Can you spary the deodorant on him? Spary it onto you, so at least you don’t smell bad. Or spray it around, a room freshener!?
From which country/continent is he? You may try telling him that it is regarded good/required to do so where he is now. Keep one with you, if he needs, deliberately place it so that he sees. Then, of course, it’s him he should ask for it.

I worked with an opera director from a former communist country who just reeked. He was clean but just had a real body odor problem. A discussion was held and the head of the department decided that it was his responsibility to say something. Anybody more subordinate, and it would come across as a personal issue.
I think it’s important who does the telling. It should come from the most senior person involved.

US custom? I know tons of Americans who do not use deoderant.

Personally, I think it’s very rude to bring up body odor. Maybe this guy thinks we smell and would never want to use something to mask his own smell.

I had an Indian professor in college who often had bo. I just sat in the back of the class.

I also like @gemiwing ‘s answer. If you buy some up-scale soaps, deodorants , perfumes etc.. then it can be seen as a welcome gift. You could even put a note that when you traveled abroad you just loved the practical items so you thought he might enjoy them too. I don’t see how someone could take that as an insult.

Giving someone a bunch of soaps and deodorants will only insult or bemuse. They are unlikely to be unaware of such things and if they are not using them already, then they unlikely to start this late in life. There is every possibility that the smell that you find offensive is normal to his lifestyle – just different to yours.

Put up with it and don’t risk offense. One of the most offensive smells to me is a BO masked with deodorant, That is rank but is common on many women. Showering twice a day with a good quality soap, changing into fresh clothing after each shower (and never wearing synthetic clothing) is all most people need to remain fresh smelling.

@DarkScribe I agree with your suggestion of showering twice and about clean clothes. Clothes that have proper ventilation will be beneficial in such cases.

@occ If you can find him when he is alone, you may send someone (someone who won’t see him again would be preferable) in his room when he’s studying…he may try telling him about using deodorants then. He may make a story that there came, in past, one alike and people disliked him cause of his odour. So, this way the message can be indirectly sent to him.