What are some of your favorite wives tales?

Reading in the dark will ruin your eyes. Wrong, Mom.

your face is going to freeze that way

While I was pregnant my mother-in-law told me not to reach up because that would cause the cord to strangle the baby.

if you have heartburn the baby will have lots of hair

if your left hand itches, its a money day

but i think you mean old wives tales

If your ears are burning, someone’s talking about you.

If you sit on cement you’ll get piles.

You’re wasting your life.
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hey, wait a minute…

my mother-in-law with Scottish roots told me on my wedding day [raining] that that meant we would have money——not

Ok, so this isn’t exactly an old wives tale: When I was a kid it was my job to feed the dogs. I would always eat some of the dog food (remember, I was a young kid). My mom finally told me that dog food would turn into worms inside of people’s stomachs. I was horrified, and immediately quit. I am proud to say that I have been dog food free for years now.

Even though Mommy is a liar.

lol!!!

If you’re having headaches you’ll birth a boy!
That one fit for my pregnancy

My grandmother would warn if I looked at myself in a mirror for too long (looking in vanity) then I would see all my life’s future ugliness added up and shown on my outside. She may have something in that, it’s pretty frightening if you go and try it.

If your nose itches, you’re going to kiss a fool.

Old wives tales are exhaustively summarized here: http://thelongestlistofthelongeststuffatthelongestdomainnameatlonglast.com/tales.html and a delight to read.

If you tell your dreams before breakfast they will come true.

If you don’t wait for at least a half hour after eating before you go swimming , you’ll get cramps and drown.

I’m not sure if this is a wive’s tale, but I was told and will tell my children:
(when you’re pouting over something) “You better tuck that lip in, or you’ll trip on it”

One that really bothers me that people still use today:
“You shouldn’t have cats while you have a newborn baby.” Sometimes the reason is “It’ll sit on its face and suffocate it to avoid the competition for your affection” or “It will suck the soul out of your baby.” But most of the time, people just cut that out and think cats kill babies. <sad>

and sometimes “soul” and “breath” are interchanged.

My mom told me if I shaved my legs after sundown the hair wouldn’t grow back as quickly. I’ve never put it to the test.

If you shave a baby’s head, their hair will come in thick and curly.

its bad luck to change a boat’s name

@Iclamae I was told a bird would poop on a pouty lip. :D

There’s an assistant principal at a primary school that gets kids hands and holds them lightly and asks them to tell her the truth… because she’ll know if they’re lying because their hands will get hot!

Eating the crust of your peanut butter and jelly sandwich will put hair on your chest.

It had an effect contrary to what it intended.

That the government will come kick in your door and arrest you if you make a joke about killing the presid. . .Hang on. Somebody’s at the door. be back in a sec. . .

Now that I think about it, there are a lot that have to do with lying. Your ears get red, your nose gets long… And the kids who are lying and are told this promptly check to see if their nose has grown or if they can feel their ears being red.

that too much masturbation will make you go blind. I must have done it just often enough, I just wear glasses.

LOL @Psychedelic_Zebra

@avvooooooo that made my lip itch. eww. Much more effective, I think.

If your nose itches it means someone is thinking about you stop thinking about me will you!

If you fold back your eye lid and the wind changes, it will stay like that the eye lid that is

If you eat a green tomato and a pear together it is poisonous

Masturbation makes your palms hairy. Actually, it makes hair sprout from your nose and ears.

@ratboy no, old age makes hair sprout from your nose and ears. Just wait til you hit fifty, bud.

If you swallow gum, it stays in your stomach for seven years.

Actually, I haven’t pooped it out yet…

I’ve always heard that pepper will put hair on your chest. And there’s also the pop rock and soda wives tale. But I do wonder what would happen if you ate a hand-full of mentos and then drank some soda, vomiting anyone?

My wife created her own: if a baby has a tummy ache and she lays the baby on her stomache – she gets a stomache ache. Come on, Hone!

@valdasta Well, you know it only counts if she’s old, right? ;-P

@Clair you are as quick as a whip! She is not old, and thankfully, not interested in Fluther.

@valdasta haha, Just had to call you on that one. ;-)

If you’re pregnant and you’re only big in front, it’s a boy.

@janbb – See, I heard that it was if the belly sits high, then it’s a boy. Granted, I got this off of an episode of the 1970s US sitcom, The Jeffersons. You know, the episode when Jenny and Lionel announce they’re pregnant and all the old ladies come over to coo?

@aprilsimnel It’s sort of the same thing because if you’re only big in front, your belly is probably sitting high.

Palms are itching you’ll get money

My mom told me to never joke about future misfortune…because the devil was listening. Apparently he was fresh out of ideas because he needed my hyperbolic tragedies to inspire his nefarious doings.

Mom was nuts. But not as nuts as grandma.

Oh I forgot. Some people say not to say a baby is beautiful, because the devil is listening.

@pinkparaluies so what do you say if the baby is butt-ugly?

@Psychedelic_Zebra In that case you say “Oooooooohhhhh the baby!” Or “You da weetle baby!” In a cutsie voice so you can get around talking directly about the babes true looks! ;D

@SpatzieLover Someone confided to me recently that when their grandchild was born the nurse came out and said “What a beautiful, beautiful baby!” So she went in expecting a very pretty baby… You can imagine the end to this story!

@avvooooooo mine was beautiful. most are not. my SIL’s last ones were so UG that I said little when we visited the hospital…other than asking her how she felt ;)

@SpatzieLover LOL! You are the naughtiest spastic flying boy I know!

And the funniest!

Warts are from touching frogs. Yes, I lived near a park where, in its little lake, there were frogs. And crayfish..

@aprilsimnel I remember being really afraid that was true when I was small. I liked picking up frogs, toads & crayfish, too

@aprilsimnel your mention of warts reminded me:

If a wart bleeds new warts will develop where the blood was Really? When I was a child I had 27 warts on my knee. One day my younger brother pushed me, I fell onto the carpet and the largest wart (the Mother Wart I later decided) got knocked and began bleeding. I was very worried that more of these ugly warts were going to invade my knee but in actual fact what happened was over time all of the warts disappeared. One 11-year-old girl was very VERY happy