If your SO committed murder, would you help them get away with it?

Yes. I would.

Depends on the circumstances. My SO was raped by a predator whose pattern was to prey on blind women. At the time, she wanted to kill him. If I had been around, there is no telling what I may have done.

For me it depends on why they murdered them.

Depends on the reason. Murdered a person trying to rape them. For sure.

Murdered to person that stole their iPod. Nope.

I’d turn them in.

Depends on the reason of murder.

/echo

Depends how much I loved them. If I had only been involved with the person for 3 months hell no. But if I was really and truly in love, I might consider it.

I really don’t know. Cause I suspect it would destroy our love, relationship and future anyway. I would have to talk to my girl about it. I think that it would be better to wait for her, getting out of jail. Here in Europe. If it would be the US, she would probably get something like 25 to life. Then, hell yes, I would cover it up.

hell no. self- defense isn’t murder.

Yes. If my SO murdered someone, she’d do it for a good reason, and I would support her.

Yup. I have done would do the same for my close friends.

Also, what is “help get away with”, exactly? Is this hiding the body, destroying evidence or supporting or lying in court?

Question is a bit vague.

No. I agree self defense isn’t murder. If he actually out of anger or hate intentionally murdered someone I would be freaked and out like a shot.

@Grisaille all of the above. Also why I added the “limits” thing in there

@Facade That is a difficult and easy thing to answer. Since I’m not in love right now and I don’t have a SO its easy for me to say I would never let them get away with it. However if I was in love and my SO did something like that I might be more hesitant. I would be very much in turmoil. However I think it is safe to say that I would abide by moral code even if the person I would have to turn is my SO. And if they did commit murder I don’t think they would be my SO anymore. Enough said.

If someone I cared about murdered someone in cold blood, that’s not something I could abide by.

@Facade Ah, gotcha.

Well, quite frankly, if it was self-defense, or something similar, the evidence should prove it to be so.

If we’re talking about a faulty ruling, and I absolutely knew she was innocent, then you bet your ass we’re hitting the road.

Oh, and if I loved her enough.

It all depends on the act or why.

I wouldn’t do anything that could land me in trouble. Sorry, SO.

I think this would have to be answered on a case by case basis. Generally, however, our approach to such a dilemma is encapsulated by something we often said to our step-son: “We don’t go bail, but we will get you a good attorney.” In addition, we have kids, so if I got involved in a cover-up we both could end up in jail and the kids would end up in foster care.

Most likely

Self-defence is the only circumstance where I could be supportive, other than that, no. The guilt alone of knowing a person had taken someone’s life and I did nothing? That would crush me.

My wife always gives me these type of hypothetical situations. I always say that she is just not the type of person who would intentionally kill anyone, and if she did so by accident, she wouldn’t try to hide it, so it’s so hard to answer. If she were to kill someone and wanted me to help her hide it, I would assume, knowing her like I do, that the circumstances were such that I’d be okay with her having killed someone and thus I would be okay helping her cover it up.

Depends on how much money we are talking about.

No.

If it was self-defense, yes (which is not murder). Anything else, no. Sorry. You murder someone, you’re out.

Same goes for close friends. I don’t believe that being a friend means becoming an accessory to murder. Murder is serious. It isn’t something you just do and forget about. It’s with you for the rest of your life. It would probably destroy our relationship and would probably destroy him. Even killing someone in self-defense can screw you up for life. It’s not something to be taken lightly. I couldn’t be with someone who thought it was okay to kill someone just because they wanted them dead.

Of course, my boyfriend is like the nicest, calmest, most non-violent person I know…

Just as an overall comment: I said “murder” for a reason. Self-defense is a different story.

As a Sicilian, “Who we knockin’ off?” is not an uncommon questin to ask your spouse.

That being said, I would have to fight against my heritage and decline to help (and insist she turn herself in).

No way. It would turn my world upside down to know he was capable of that. Even in self-defense it would probably freak me out. I would not help him hide it, but I would stand by him.

If your SO was in the military, and they shot and killed a combatant, would this change the scenario at all?

@Grisaille

It would for me, because if you’re in the military and are sent into combat, it’s expected that you’ll do that. If I weren’t comfortable with it, then I wouldn’t be with someone who was in the military.

And yeah, it wouldn’t be “murder” in the legal sense.

@Grisaille That wouldn’t be murder in the legal sense.

Just throwing it out there, fuel for conversation.

Since you clarified that you aren’t talking about self-defense and you’re talking about coldblooded murder: No way in hell would I help them cover it up. I don’t care how long I’d been with them, how much I loved them, etc. Murder is disgusting and if someone I know did it, they’d be out of my life forever.

Not if I was the intended victim.

Nope—couldn’t abet a murder. And I would be heartbroken if my SO killed someone.

Not under any circumstances. If it was justified, turn yourself in and go through the legal process. If it was not, get your ass away from me you murderous piece of shit.

No.

No. Even if I weren’t the victim in question, she’d err on the side of caution and take me out too.