Do you see someone you dislike for no apparent reason on a regular basis?

I know it may sound weird, but my ‘personal’ policy is to dislike everyone at work by default. I encourage them to gain my trust and simpathy, but if they fail, I don’t care that much. They are just work-mates after all.

Usually the people I dislike I dislike for a reason and I avoid them because of it.

well, there is the associate shipping coordinator that has taken up residence in my guard shack, and I find her annoying as Hell. I see her everyday, and I never knew that the two years I drove a school bus back in the 90’s would be training for learning how to tune out someone I’d rather just strangle to death.

My job is difficult enough when the truckers start coming fast and furious, and she simply slows the process down more than it needs to be. Lately she has to check their bills of lading to make sure they are coming to the right address. This makes sense for the occasional new delivery driver from a new company, but the guys that have been coming for years on regular daily routes are checked as well. Even the guys that come to my site twice a day, every day of the week.

You want to piss a truck driver off, just act like he is too stupid to know where he is going, even though his local in-town route has had the same regular stops for years.

Yeah, I know the feeling. There are some moms in the neighborhood where I work who I have never talked to but for some reason I’ve always disliked them. I wonder if it shows and they think of me as the bitch nanny? and I’ve been watching The WSOP, and I hate Darvin Moon. I cheered when he lost last night. Why? Because.

I just try to remember not to hold what’s going on in my head against them in case I ever have to deal with them. It’s not their fault I’m secretly baselessly judgmental and they have annoying faces.

If I feel that way intensely about anyone, I always look to find what inner feeling, memory, character trait or flaw this person is raising within me and why I am so affected. I never take genuine dislike for no reason as acceptable or look to justify it. I always view it as an opportunity to find greater inner peace through acceptance and understanding. Not for the sake of some high minded ideal but just for the sake of being more grounded and peaceful within.

@qashqai
Spreading the love huh?

Yes I experience this feeling a lot but most of the time I just try to see them as a person with feelings as well and I try to focus on their good points instead of their bad. If I can’t find any avoidance is the best solution. for me at least

Don’t be too busy looking out for people’s bad points, look for their good points instead (=

@higherground who said I was focusing on anything? If I am focusing on anything it’s the reason why. I have no problem with her & I’m sure she hasn’t one with I, it’s the reason why I dislike her so much I don’t understand.

@SeventhSense that’s what I’ve been try to do, but I can’t quite place my finger on why it is so. Just about everyday that I notice her anyway I try to figure out why or what in my past experience is triggering it.

@all I was asking you of your experience. Not advice, but thnx anyway, I guess.

I have actually found that, in person, I can be quick to dislike people, mostly for trivial reasons. I don’t make it very apparent though, especially to their face, and there have been people that I’ve initially disliked that I’ve grown to be friends with. There are certainly a few people who just rub me the wrong way in general, but I figure you can’t like everyone, and everyone can’t like you.

@qashqai OOH! Can I please get in line to be your friend. I’ll work very hard, I promise,

Listen folks, it shouldn’t be like/dislike at 1st sight. Reasonable people learn before they make those decisions. Otherwise you are like the 4 yo who balks at anything new “because I hate it” Adult meet someone new, treat them with common courtesy, observe and then decide what kind of relationship will develop-from friendly to none. Deciding for no discernible reason you don’t like someone is nonsense. It’s more likely one has a reason but just don’t want to admit it and to immediately dislike a stranger one has never even spoken to is a character flaw,

I’m not even saying it has to take a long time. One year we got a new principal; The previous year we had gotten a state commendation and our previous principal had been promoted. At the first faculty meeting we were all excited about continuing our programs. The new principal was introduced and when she spoke the 1st thing she said was that she was going fix our school. She proceeded to tell us that we would be required to work extended hours including 1 Saturday a month. At that point I raised my hand, was recognized, held up the contract and said that was not in the contract so it wasn’t going to happen. Within 10 minutes we knew we weren’t going to like each other with reasons. We worked together for 3 years and were never overtly rude to each other,

I can’t stand one of my best friends. Within the past year or two, he has just gotten so annoying I almost cannot tolerate him anymore. I find my self subtly lashing out at him whenever he acts stupid, which is what he’s done lately.

@Parrappa Why not be honest with a “best” friend? Instead of subtly dissing him, why not tell him what he’s doing that gets to you? Or at the very least stop seeing him? Definitely uncool.

No, I think it is self-destructive to dislike people. I try to find something to like about everyone I meet.

@Axemusica, sometimes there are people that you just can’t find common ground with, and that makes them hard to like. Or, they subliminally remind you of a person that you have a repressed bad memory of, like the grouchy lady in the office in kindergarten.

I tend to either like most people, or are neutral. I try to be acutely aware of what people’s shortcomings are, so I can work around them.

@Axemusica my answer to your question is a resounding yes. There is a woman I work with who has rubbed me the wrong way since the first time I saw her. I have no idea why and haven’t bothered to try to figure it out. I would really like to say that I looked into my heart to find out what it is in me that makes me dislike this woman, but that would be a lie. I just don’t like her and frankly I am way too busy to try and figure out why or how to fix it. When we work together I pretty much ignore her. My disliking her is not having a negative impact on either of our lives, so why get worked up about it?

@PandoraBoxx I’m thinking it is possibly memory of someone. I mean I have no real reason to, but I can’t recall anyone in my past that resembles her in any way.

@galileogirl She’s not a stranger. I’ve worked with her for over a year. I’m not rude to her and shed no sign of my absurd dislike for her. I can’t think of any reasons why I feel this way towards her, but wouldn’t it be reasonable to wonder why? I still treat her like I would anyone else. Just for the simple fact I know that I really have no reason to dislike, but I do.

@All, sure it sounds like I am being an ass, but I really tried to get along with the ASC I work with. Unfortunately, it comes down to the old line I’ve learned in the freight biz. The people in the office have no clue as to how things work on the dock.

I really do try to get along with most people; I have to, as my job is PR for the company, but this woman is ‘quite the piece of work’.

@Axemusica GQ and GAs all around for you.

@Psychedelic_Zebra I wouldn’t say you’re being an ass. I really hate my boss. I’m surprised he even still has this company running the way he does things, but I do feel you kind of lost the main point of the question. That being that you don’t really have a reason for the dislike, but you have a valid reason for disliking this woman. Thnx for the lurve though. :)

@Axemusica I can’t offhand think of anyone I dislike for no apparent reason; that’s not how my mind works. Interesting concept though.

Now I’m wondering if those of us who do sometimes dislike people for no apparent reason are in the minority. I always thought everyone had those kinds of reactions to some people.

@SuperMouse funny you say that, because I usually like everyone or at least could careless. It’s just her though. I’ve never really disliked anyone else for no reason, so maybe it’s just odds. Odds are most people just haven’t met that person that’s rubs them against the grain.

Well, I guess it doesn’t really matter anymore since I was just fired today for posting this