What value is there in the telling of jokes that come at the expense of another?

nothing. It’s mean and nasty. I have friends (well, I used to think they were) who still make “mad” jokes about me, because of my breakdown. Trust me, it hurts and is not nice.

It happens occasionally here also. The addition of j/k doesn’t take the sting out of it.

It is similar to bullying and caused, I would guess, by insecurities.

It’s a nice, easy way to stroke your own ego. “Haha, at least I’m not as [adjective] as [pronoun]!

It can be funny coming of a stage, but in a personal context it can be very hurtful.

Good Question. Sometimes it reminds me of grade-school bullying.

I think that a lot of so-called denigrating humor is using a specific strategy. Post-irony is not easy to wrap one’s conscious mind around. By specifically demonstrating the subtle, underlying biases in cultural norms, the idiotic clinging to stereotypes and other forms of prejudice, even the way we react to overt shock value demonstrates that subconsciously, prejudice and bias are abhorrent to our humanity.

Now, one has to tread these waters lightly, because not used properly post-irony can appear as actual hatred, prejudice, and plain meanness. Professional comedians use this strategy a lot, including the much loved Stephen Colbert. Also think about Dave Chapelle. A lot of these strategies started in camp culture, imo.

Having said that, some people are just crass and inane. But I have to admit, I laugh, if I’m not offended. But I never laugh at people. That’s not true, I’ll laugh at the truly ridiculous, but doesn’t everyone?

deepens your relationship as long as you can make them smile while doing it! :)

I think I’ve said this before, but I believe it all goes back to us needing something else to take our minds off of whatever shit is happening in our lives at the moment. We just want to laugh to keep from crying, and we don’t care how we get the laugh. it’s sad

Some find it an easy tool to elevating themselves, even if it is only in their own heads. I personally don’t find value in it and think it unnecessary to belittle anyone.

@ninjacolin ~Yeah- I can see that. It gives that same fond feeling a wedgie provides. ;)

lol, really, though it does. but you get bonus friend points for telling it to the person you gossiped about’s face.. and make them laugh about it too! you also get points from the person you gossiped about because you don’t keep secrets. you just kinda make light of the extremes in the other person’s character.

I make jokes at others expense, but I have always made it clear that I only do that to people I like.
If I don’t like you, I will not make any jokes about you.
When someone makes jokes about me, it’s important that I laugh at it, if it is funny.

Before we all get on our high horses I would like to see, by a show of hands, how many of you have laughed at some poor fella taking a shot to his crotch. In fact, how many of you have laughed ant any kind of slapstick? Have any of you ever laughed at Don Rickles?

I think most folks answer this type of question with a memory of the last time they were laughed at instead of when they were doing the laughing.

I’m with @filmfann. You should be able to dish it out as long as you can take it.

It’s funny

@Blondesjon Like your avatar!

@Blondesjon GA I completely agree. We’ve all had a laugh at someone else’s expense at one time or another only last week I laughed at some poor chap fall off his bike, he couldn’t see me laughing as I was in the car and I saw him pick himself up, dust himself off and then look around in the vain hope that no one had seen, I’m sure he would have chuckled if he had witnessed someone else doing it.

I think many people make jokes about their own “groups” and it is fine. Jews in the Borscht Belt days were making fun of themselves, and even on Seinfeld, The Nanny, and Larry David shows. Black comedians make fun of their own, so do Italians. Being able to laugh at yourself is a good thing I think. I guess it depends on the joke, and who is telling it.

The question isn’t so about if it’s ok or not. It’s more about the value it brings.

I think it helps people be less defensive if they can laugh at themselves. The tradition of having a sense of humour is valuable in my opinion. I see people in real life and on fluther being overly sensitive in my opinion, makes it hard to talk about things, even serious topics, when people are too careful or worried about insulting people or worried about generalizing too much.

The only value any joke has is whether or not it causes laughter.

Humor is 100% objective and not easily quantified.

@Blondesjon good point. I think you meant subjective though.

Ooops.

thankyouverymuch

It depends on who is using the joke. Within a community jokes of this sort can help strengthen a community against ill forces. Such as slaves calling each other the “n-word”. Not a joke per say but jokes could be of a similar nature. In my culture this is a big phenomenon. If used outside a community or at an individual’s expense (even within community) then I see no value in it what-so-ever. In fact I think that defending humor for the sake of humor, regardless of who it hurts or who it supports social stereotyping, is absolutely ridiculous.

@RedPowerLady . . . then what group of humor police get to determine what jokes are and aren’t appropriate?

do we elect this group?

how do we elect this group?

who gets to elect this group?

are they all powerful or can their decisions be appealed?

does everyone get a vote?

Milo here; I select the group, I elect the group, I get the only vote, I refuse all appeals and I forbid any anti-cat jokes. After that it’s sauve qui peut.

@Blondesjon Each group gets to decide for themselves what is appropriate. So if you tell a joke about Black people then they decide. Cultural self-determination. Of course you will never get everyone to agree but if a large part of the cultural group can make an educated argument then I say we stand behind it. I am not a believer that the individual is more important than the group, in this circumstance. I see you disagree and I doubt this answer will change your mind. Personally I don’t think any excuse will have me thinking support of stereotypes for humor’s sake is “appropriate”.

There is value in identifying certain personalities that enjoy themselves at other’s expense. Good to know for future encounters.