When guests stay overnight, do you want them to strip the bed?

I just make the bed…

@mowens You can visit.

usually i just want them to strip.

When my girlfriend stays overnight, after her shower, she drapes her bath towel over the shower curtain rod (to let it dry out a little). I then grab it (at some point) and throw it in the wash. It’s better than her tossing it in the wash without me knowing.

I tell my guests to not worry about anything like bedding or towels, that I’ll take care of it, and that I mean this.

My guests are primarily family and the generic rule I follow in my head is that I just hope they ‘leave it/things the way they found them’. If they do that for the most part I’m a happy camper in my own abode.

I usually take care of bedding and such myself after they leave. If they insist on helping I’d probably let them help strip the bed, but nothing more really. I want to be a good host and do everything myself, plus I wouldn’t want something to happen like when your guests put the bedding in the laundry without telling you.

For a short stay this is fine. If the person was going to stay for any longer than a week or so I’d probably ask them to help out a little bit here or there.

I tell guests to make themselves at home which to me means take your shoes off, eat if you are hungry, basically act like you are home. I don’t, however want them to do anything like clean the dishes or strip their bed. While I want them to feel at home, I don’t want them to have to do any housework. Some people just insist though.

@aprilsimnel Same here. I don’t expect my guests to do anything like stripping the bed. If they straighten it out that’s nice but anything else I would rather sort out myself.

If I spend the night as a guest I always strip the bed and fold everything. Maybe that isn’t good etiquette. I thought it was. I guess I should ask, but then again, they will always say not to as a host.

@knitfroggy Can i stay over?

@oratio I have no idea what the proper “etiquette” is? Might be interesting to look it up, what the experts recommend. I think I am going to do what @aprilsimnel does and make sure to tell people not to do it, so they know what I prefer.

@JLeslie Good plan. I like when people strip the bed after themselves, but I can relate to doing the dishes etc. I don’t like when people roam around my kitchen. Cleaning, washing, putting things where they are not supposed to be.

I don’t mind one way or the other. If I think of it, I tell guests not to worry about it and leave the bed as-is. Our guest room is in the basement, and no one ever goes down there. An unmade bed doesn’t bother me, and I do laundry too often to have the sheets get forgotten in the washer. One benefit to having a family of five!

Well, I have a fold-out sofa that guest sleep on and I am generally very busy, so it’s a big help when they strip the bed and fold all the blankets for me!

I prefer them to get out.

I will take care of the rest.

@Thammuz sure!

@MissAusten I don’t care if they make the bed either, the guestroom is their to do whatever they want while they are uests in my house. I just don’t them to cause me more work when I am not ready for it. I can easily ignore my guestroom for a few days, but a huge pile of dirty linens in my laundry room is more difficult for me, especially if it includes damp towels.

Just to piggy back on the question: Do you feel the host should pay for things like dinners and groceries, or the guest? When I stay at someone’s house I try to pick up a dinner here and there and pay for all or part of the groceries. I see it like I am staying (for free) in their home, so I kind of “pay” for it by treating them. But, I have had instances where hosts would not let me pay for anything, including theatre ticket, train rides, taxi’s etc. I feel they are being too generous. I think sometimes they feel I have spent a lot to get there on a flight or renting car maybe? Or, maybe they just always do that for guests.

My grandmother taught me to always strip the bed. Everyone in my family does so. I can understand not wanting a person to, and leaving the task for later. But, I’d probably prefer it if the guest did it.

I don’t really care. Putting them in the washer and not mentioning it is pretty silly. For the most part I would rather they just do nothing. Leave the sheets on the bed, don’t even make it up. But if they prefer to make the bed, great. If the strip it, fine. When I’m a guest I make the bed. I figure stripping it is not exactly a big job, but making it is a bit harder. I also like to leave the room as I found it.

When I’m a guest, I’ve learned to ask them how they’d like to proceed, as it were. I’ve had friends who wanted me to make/strip the bed and some who didn’t want me to bother.

I make the bed usually.

However I do have a place I visit in the mountains to paint. The hosts are gracious people. Because I essentially invite myself I will get up early on my last day, strip the bed, wash the sheets, make the bed and am certain that the studio and room are just as I found them.

I usually just fold the sheets and blankets and place them at the end of the bed when my stay is over. That way, they can choose what to do with them and when.
If you have issues with guests stripping their bed too soon maybe say something like “Oh and don’t worry about stripping the bed or anything. I’ll take care of it when I do laundry next time.” That way there isn’t any confusion :)
As far as helping pay for groceries when I visit someone else, yes, I try to offer to buy the groceries needed to make dinners. Even when they insist that I don’t need to contribute, at least I know I tried and they probably think more highly of me for that.

It doesn’t matter to me; they should do what makes them most comfortable.

I make the bed when I stay at someone’s house because I feel I am leaving the room tidier than it would be with dirty linens out and an unmade bed. That way they also have the option of getting to it when they want. Stripping the bed takes one minute – I don’t even really understand how it is all that helpful.

As for paying, I try to pay for food and I pay for my own activities. I won’t argue if they are overly insistent, but it makes me uncomfortable.

When I’m a guest, I just ask, “Can I help you with the bedding?”. When I have guests, I just go with whatever they do.

@JLeslie that could never happen to me, I do laundry nearly every day.

leave the room as you found it: CLEAN… or DONT COME BACK!
That means making the bed. I will clean the sheets,etc. later.