Is "gaydar" real?

It’s called intuition with most other things.

no

Yes, and it’s available at Sharper Image.

The Office anyone?

Not in a literal sense, but there are signs you can pick up on and you can make the assumption that a person is gay. I have done this and been right before.

@DominicX ; so… anyone can have it with practice.

Yes.

I think so, just because I have terrible gaydar. I’m always shocked to learn when someone is gay even when it was obvious to my friends with “better” gaydar.

That said, I’m always attracted to gay guys

@sliceswiththings ; mine is really bad. I’m the last one to know. Dx

Nah, not really. When I hear people use the term “gaydar”, I’m pretty sure they’re referring to the stereotypical flamboyant gay guys. What about the ones that aren’t like that? No way to tell whatsoever if they passed you on the street, or you heard random conversation.

@troubleinharlem

Pretty much, yeah. Although for me, a lot of times it’s just wishful thinking. But I was right about my boyfriend. :)

I was actually surprised to find that one of my closest friends had no idea I was gay. She was just completely clueless. There were so many signs!

Also, I’m not referring to knowing someone’s gay by looking at them for two seconds (aside from the flamboyant stereotypical ones). I would need more time and information than that.

Gay and bisexual men and lesbians have a more fine tuned gaydar as they spend more time around gay people so they subconsciously know the signals GLB people give out. Even straight people have a gay some people are just good at it and others aren’t.

@DominicX ; that’s what I’m like! I never know, with girls or guys.

Mine is very good, due to long practice and no judgment. I think its just something that some people develop when they care about observing other people.

It only works on flamboyant gay men and masculine gay women.

Well, it may not be true in the sense that society generally says it’s true Oh, he’s dance major, he must be gay. Look at that butch hair cut, she must be gay. but I wouldn’t be surprised if there were simply different hormonal cues, which makes sense. Humans, for the most part, have learned to ignore our instincts and the cues that are sent to our brains unless we are absolutely bludgeoned. It does make sense, however, that someone with a certain sexuality sends out different cues than someone with a different sexuality. Sometimes I wonder when I see a woman that I am so wildly attracted to that maybe this is so because she might be attracted to me or, at the very least, other women. The same is true of men.

If a gay woman, a gay man, and a straight man are in a room together, the straight man might be able to tell if the gay man is gay because the gay man’s hormones will probably more heightened in the other man’s direction whereas the gay woman’s hormones will not be heightened at all. This could also be connected to the myth that bisexuals pansexuals, omnisexuals, etc. are attracted to everyone because, on a hormonal level, they respond to the hormones sent out by both or all sexes.

In short, yes, I believe gaydar is real but only a purely hormonal level.

Yes. I have very good gaydar. Mostly I think it is because I am around gay people a lot so even if it is not very obvious I might catch somethng that gives it away. I should clarify I am very good at picking up if a man is gay, not so good when it comes to women.

There must be gaydar, because if there wasn’t, the gays would have gone extinct long ago.

This is interesting. I think one can correctly assume someone’s sexual orientation, but there’s no surefire way of knowing, without asking. It’s intuition and looking for signs.

@Facade That doesn’t make sense. The really obvious ones are obvious to everyone. It’s the not obvious ones that takes gaydar to figure out.

I have excellent ‘gaydar’, and I’ve only been wrong once. Flamboyant or not, even bi-sexual/pan-sexual… I just know. That’s not to say I will pick up on every individual I come into contact with, just that if I do have a flash of insight into someone’s sexuality, that insight is rarely wrong. I have no idea why I am able to perceive this; I don’t think I’ve had more contact with gay people than anyone else or anything. My best friend, on the other hand, is completely clueless… even to flamboyantly gay men.

Hell, yeah!

i work with a guy who is so flamboyant, swishy, the way he walks, talks, hand gestures, dresses, decorates his cubicle, all the stereotypical things someone might associate with a gay person. however, he is married. he brought his daughter to work and introduced her as his daughter. i thought to myself “oh that must have been from before he realized he was gay.” he is presently married and i can’t figure it out. i try not to judge a book by it’s cover and this guy is a reminder to me why i shouldn’t. really, i’m constantly baffled when i look at him.

@jca: Did he specify that he was married to a woman?

others have told me he is married to a woman. honestly, i am not lying when i say i’m baffled every time i look at this guy.. he even has a pink cell phone. wtf?

@jca There are many who are in denial and carry on as if they aren’t, even if they know they are. Sometimes it has to do with societal pressures, sometimes it has to do with religion… sometime they’re just trying to wish it away. Who knows with your guy.

Gaydar definitely exists, and I have it. I have it hard. I know people are gay before they know they’re gay. Some call it a gift, some call it a curse.

Ok, but seriously. I can even usually peg bi/pansexuals.

Of course. Theres an app for it.

@fireinthepriory I call it a gift, so you can then tell me:)

@fireinthepriory ; pansexuals?

@troubleinharlem Pansexuality.

Fact from fiction, truth from diction. If there is a “Gaydar” mine is broken or I don’t own one, and really don’t care. The people I know, I know. I try hard not to know them as Billy the Mexican, Sally the Little Person, or Joey the ex-con etc. I view people off their character. The Gay people I knew in the past before we ended up in different areas or paths in life I did not care to see two dudes swapping spit I left when that started up, if they always did it then I would not be hanging with them as a couple but one at a time. Before you who just want to make something out of that get going, it was not done to make a statement of morality for or against Gayness, had they been into self-medicating I would not be around them when they were popping pills, smoking strange stuff, or putting needles in their arms. Just because I don’t want to see them acting queer in front of me don’t mean I would try to stop them from doing so, I will just take myself away from that type of action.

@Hypocrisy_Central Just so you know, many people are offended by the word queer. So, if they are gay it is fine, you just don’t want to see them kissing or holding hands? Or, do you simply want little to do with gay people in general?

@JLeslie Over my life time I have had many Gay friends, some open and others stil in the closet. When we parted ways it was not because they were Gay it was because they relocated or I did. They were not my “Gay friends” they were so-and-so MY FRIEND. I may not be all jiggy with their lifestyle but they were not with mine either. We did our best to respect each other’s bounderies; I did not thump them over the head with my religion, and they did not do the heavy PDA around me. It is just the physical part I would rather not get up close and personal with, swapping spit and groping where I can see I will admit I don’t care for; the action not the people. But I also don’t want to be in the same room when people I have known or was friendly with decided it was time to shoot up, so it was not just the Gays who’s actions were avoided. Hand holding I can more than likely overlook.

What’s this got to do with Gaydar?

Gaydar is real. Otherwise, the only way they would find each other is by having conversations that include openings like “So, I was sucking on this cock the other day…”

@filmfann: That made me chuckle. :)

90% of the men that I’ve been attracted to are gay. Friends (mostly gay men) always take me to meet guys that they are involved with. We always (jokingly) say that if I like them, they’re gay. I don’t that it’s real, but it seems like the gay men that I meet I like because they often have characteristics that I am attracted to.