Parents: Since becoming a parent what have you done that you swore you would never do?
Asked by
OpryLeigh (
25310
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December 7th, 2009
Firstly I hope this doesn’t turn into a debate about whether it is right or wrong to spank kids. That isn’t what this is about.
It is probably very easy for those of us who don’t have kids to say “I definately won’t do this or that when I have kids” but, like with many situations in life, until you have experience you don’t know what you would do.
So, what have you done that you didn’t think you would since becoming a parent or what haven’t you done that you thought you would? Do you regret going against your original beliefs?
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29 Answers
I don’t have kids yet but I bet a lot of parents would have to say “have a kid!”
Swear in front of them. – But I waited until they were teens. I can’t help it. It just comes out! Surprises the h*ll out of me too! However, there have never been people in my life who have frustrated me or got me as upset as they do sometimes. I love them to pieces though!
@autumn43 My dad would probably agree with you. Since my brother and I hit the dreaded teenage years my dad has sworn more than he has ever done in his whole life (and he was in the military!!!). It’s always more tongue in cheek rather than out of anger but he stands by his belief that my brother and I are a bad influence on him!!!
Does a dog parent count? On a nice day in the summer, my dog kept bugging me while I was working to go outside or come inside from the back yard. I was quite chagrined to hear myself channeling my mother as I exasperatedly held open the back door, while saying “In or out, one or the other, but whichever it is, you are going to stay there for a while.”
@Marina Of course dog parenting counts! That is as far as my parenting experience goes as well and I, myself have been guilty of saying to my dogs “will you make up your mind” as if they are likely to turn to me, apologise for being so indecisive and then make an educated decision!!!
There’s nothing I know of that I said “Oh I definitely won’t ever do that!”
But, I will say, I never thought I’d get so annoyed by my own child that I’d be desperate for a break. I felt terribly guilty, but when other mothers admitted to the same feelings, I found that it was quite normal for your children to make you want to rip your hair out.
Oh okay, I thought of some things my husband and I say we’ll never do..and haven’t encountered yet, so I don’t know if we’ll change out mind.
We both never want a tv in our children’s room, nor do we find the need for them to have their own laptops. My husband and I will have our own personal computers, but we’ll set up a family PC for school work, and if they really need to use one, they can go to the library. We’ll see how well that works out when we have two teenage boys in high school. lol
Oy – pretty much everything, including raising my voice, sending the kids to their rooms, saying I told you so’s and various other stupid things. Fortunately, they ignore me most of the time, and they are now old enough to know right from wrong. I think I may have done a pretty good job; haven’t screwed them up too much.I love my little angels. Just wanted to add that.
GQ, by the way.
ZEN OUT
Fight with my wife in front of the kids.
I used to say ‘ugh I never just want to say ‘this is so because I’m older and know better’ but I have found myself saying that once or twice…I also never wanted to fall into the cliche fights between partners that occur because of kids and exhaustion…but we too have resented each other from time to time
Anyone used the “Because I said so, that’s why!” line?
@Leanne1986, oh yeah. But you know how that’s received. They always gotta know WHY.
Let them watch retarded kids shows. Ex: Barney. Now that I have a kid though, l’ll sit and watch Barney with him just to see his little face light up. It’s all about making him happy, as long as it’s not total rubbish, like Teletubbies.
@ubersiren haha I love teletubbies – for myself – the kids don’t watch it
He’s definitely allowed to watch Sesame Street! We love that in our house. I enjoy it almost as much as he does.
@ubersiren I don’t have children but I still watch Sesame Street! I’ve toyed with the idea of claiming that I leave it on for the dog but I don’t think normal humans will believe me!
probably (according to some) “spoil” my child. I give in to him a lot… but it’s because I don’t pretend that I know everything and what’s right…and I love him…and I want him to have what he wants..why shouldn’t he…within reason…and within reason is where the line is obscure
@Leanne1986 of course! …seriously; that was a beautiful thing to say
All the usual phrases the old school parents used to come out with:
How many times do I have to tell you!
Giving the child their full title when they been real BAD!
Tough!
What’s the magic word!
Although I find now, that because I try so hard not to use the old phrases, I just ended up using new ones, ahem:
Its only funny the first time!
I want doesn’t get!
Monkey see monkey do!
Do it again, your gettin a smack!
And my personal favorite, when things go tits up and something gets spilt or broken, I just end up screamin ‘WHY!’
A conversation I love having with my kids:
‘Dad I want…..’
‘No, I want doesn’t get!’
‘Dad, I need…..’
‘Need or want?...NO!’
‘Dad, can I have…?
‘What’s the magic word!?!’
‘Dad, can I have….please!?!’
‘well sein-as-tho you asked nicely, er, actually NO!’
Don’t look at me like that!....its usually chocolate that they want, an they’ve usually already bloody well had some!, an its usually my NUTELLA!.......
My 3 year old Jasmin, is good tho I have to admit, she comes to me with the spoon that’s just been mauled for nutella and says ‘last one no more daddy!’
@Pazza I’ve been known to say tough, only a couple of times…but I’ve cringed and severely admonsihed myself afterwards… and I love the magic word one… Theo doesn’t get it though yet… he thinks..it’s “what”!!! Can I use ”It’s only funny the first time!” ? lol lurve your answer xxx
@lynneblundell
haha, Ye feel free.
One of my mums friends used to say ‘you kids don’t know your born!’, never understood that one.
Another one of her friends was called Evalin used to always say ‘I’d stop all the sweets!’
Needless to say we called her Evil Lyn!
fighting with my husband infront of him. i sawy parents fight all the time and swore i would never do that. our marrige got off to a rocky start but now it’s gotten better and we try our best not to fight infront of him and i wish i could stop cursing.
The only thing I ever promised myself was that I would never ask them where they were going and then not believe them and that I would never give my kids contradicting conditions. I have been successful at both.
I also promised that I would never make a promise and break it but my parents didn’t break promises. That was something I promised myself and kept to it as well.
I’m not saying I was the perfect parent but my parents were pretty good and so I had pretty good role models. Of course raising children often requires you adjust some ideas to suite your childs personality or your own life style and sometimes you can make mistakes because your child does not think like you did at their age but you learn and move on. So long as you rear your child with love, commitment and disapline and direction than you can’t really go wrong.
I turned into my father and took control of the remote and thermostat…
@GoonSquad
You left the lightswitches to the kids!
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